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Thread: gates of hell- shamrock n gifted signs

  1. #1
    GENIUS
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    gates of hell- shamrock n gifted signs

    GIFTED SIGNS


    The pearlywhite gates can't compare to hell gates structure
    its a steel gate thats fire proof and a undistructable texture
    most people run away from them but I have imbrassed it
    I walk to these gates with a big smile and just loving it
    the steel frame ingulped in flame all inches over
    demons surround the structure
    .........................the flame none try to smolder
    souls who never get turned awayfrom this flaming gates
    dead people who walk to the gates to seal their fate
    no other structure aroundjust rocks, fire, and lava
    no parting just death and no one livin just fire like a burna
    for most no one wants to come and look at this place
    the ones who have don't look the same
    ..........................................just look at their face
    no list to know if you are really supposed to be there
    they accept you cause their moto is
    .............................you supposed to go somewhere
    livin the life to go to the pearly gates, but hell have no rules
    heaven is unlike hell cause in hell you don't need all the right tools
    to walk throw hell's gate all you need is Sin upon God
    declined from heaven you can walk throw hell's gate and be a devils pod
    when you take a glance at the gates you wouldn't want to go up
    but I love hell's gate and I can't wait to see it and run up


    SHAMROCK


    Reminicin on my lifes events as my past flashes,
    I wasted my life I let it blow away like fuckin ashes,
    I had potential to do great but I treated it like shit,
    Had a tight grip on my life, but I just let go of it,
    Careers n opportunities t make something of myself,
    But all d drugs n drink jus damaged my health,
    Had a chance in law but I thought that shit wuz borin,
    Plus I got fired, for fallin asleep n snoring,
    Didn’t listen t my family, who were tryna guide me,
    I feel ashamed of myself, I need someone to hide me,
    I wuz selfish n I wuz heartless, blocked out who tried t help me,
    Den cried myself to sleep cos I felt my life wuz empty,
    Wen I wuz wealthy I grew mean, had a desire to be number 1,
    Bossed people around n worked took no regard to havin fun,
    Everybody who loved me, I abused their friendship n their trust,
    Influenced to hurt people, by my own desire and lust,
    I soon Grew old and lonely, I felt cold in my old age,
    No wife no family left I pleaded for my grave,
    When the day grew near I lived in fear because of all my sins,
    I hung in there physically but already died within,
    After death I saw a light shining brightly before me,
    Sighed a sign of relief, thought god wuz waitin 4 me,
    As I grew near the light I started becoming nervous,
    “how come im up here, I thought I’d be in d furnace”,
    as d gates began opening I reached out my arms,
    but then they slammed shut and off went an alarm,
    I suddenly dropped n fell straight through a giant hole,
    Landed on my ass n said goodbye to my soul,
    I realised I wuz looking in the eyes of the demon,
    About t lose my freedom, man I must be dreamin,
    The black gates opened quickly n banged with a clang,
    Everybody stooped n looked n soon some of them sang,
    I wept as I realised, here I would have to dwell,
    As I slowly walked through the black gates of hell

  2. #2

  3. #3
    Ethical
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    Nice flow,Structure,wordplay,an Vocab..... This was a good piece to read... Props to both of ya'll...

    stay up

  4. #4
    The Solution Gifted Signs's Avatar
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    Thanks for the feedback uppin for more feedback
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  5. #5
    E.z. eddie
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    some nice shit from both of yall. was really feelin the topic kept me goin wit the heaven and hell thing i think u portrayed ur ideas and theorys real well as also writing ur feelings. Both ur verse flowed perfectly expesially urs shamrock it was good at the beginning but toward the end i could actually hear a little beat in my head even though it had a type of peom feel 2 it tha was nice. Signs u also had a nice flow i liked this part.

    the steel frame ingulped in flame all inches over
    demons surround the structure
    .........................the flame none try to smolder


    like how it flowed

    both of u had good struc nice peace all around




    hit up my shit called lil e's story

  6. #6
    The Solution Gifted Signs's Avatar
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  7. #7
    GENIUS
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    uppin 4 feed pls.

  8. #8
    GENIUS
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    sum feed plz

  9. #9
    GENIUS
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    feed on dis pls......

  10. #10
    GENIUS
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    feed?????????????/

  11. #11
    It's a big FUCK U Frostbite's Avatar
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    Likin this peice but concept has been done before
    Like the flow and the collab wit u two
    Keep it up

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  12. #12
    GENIUS
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    anymore feed????

  13. #13
    GENIUS
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    cum on ppl drop feed!!!!!!!!!!!!!plz

  14. #14
    GENIUS
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    anyone?????

  15. #15
    Banned
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    yea this was really good....havent read anything from you two before...maybe i should start to....cuz this was mad interesting and it nice imagery and vocab was pretty good....rhymes were good......multies were too..flow was smooth...strucutre was even...topic was cool....overall this was tight..keep it up...peace

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