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Thread: The Waters Reflections

  1. #1
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    The Waters Reflections

    Through the flowing paths of the waves in the ocean spray..
    A man see's a lifes reflection, slowly eroding by decay
    a fluent dream of happiness is common, but for life it didnt show
    This poor elderly human would fall down in his lifes road
    Standing hoplessly on the balcony, waves crashing in the rough
    his emotions erupt in anger, his bones aching and such..
    This liquid reflection is clear, but the life he chose is not
    A true victim of lonelyness, a man left there to rot
    the foam bubbles reach the surface, creating a vibrant splash
    drops of water float in air, and apparently............crash
    a coincidal occurence, this mans life to the liquid forms
    On rotten days this man is hectic, and the water storms
    on sunny days this man is happy, forgetting is lonely life
    and on a sunny day, the ocean spray is calm all night
    call it a coincidence, but he see's it as a meaning....
    almost destined to be on the balcony its seeming.
    the weathers fairly distorted, but i see a future clear
    the loud drops of water...stopped, as he hears in his ear
    the clouds part away, leaving a bright sky to see
    and suddenly this mans problems dissapear from destiny
    .
    .
    .
    gods gift is given to him, inorder to keep this special way..
    he must follow the given path, and not let this road decay


    Links Soon

  2. #2
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    Upppp

  3. #3
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    Thanks Fore.

  4. #4
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    Up foo's

  5. #5
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    wtf


    up

  6. #6
    Banned Visual-X's Avatar
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    Good piece of work, nce flow, i liked it
    Work on multi's a lil more
    and some of your lines didnt rhyme but i see where your coming from
    not everything has to

    Ummm. The subject wuz good i liked it
    i liked the ending but could be alil stronger

    keep the good work up man, peace
    check out mine Falsely Accused

  7. #7
    ...Philly® aka Teacher Token Muslim's Avatar
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    first of all i have 2 say good choice of words, and nice wordplay...... i was realy feeling this peace cuz you really stuck to ur title....i also liked the flow....not 2 crzy, but not lazy niether..... the ending could have been stronger........but i figure that if u just give it a lil more thought you'll b gd 2 go........but no disrespect.......keep up the good work, look 4wrd 2 reading more peaces from u.........thx 4 a nice rhyme!!!
    Artificial Intelligence

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