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Thread: Crossing The Gap

  1. #1
    ToTheTop Steven William's Avatar
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    Crossing The Gap

    This is an old piece I wrote months ago but never posted.

    Crossing the Gap

    Plunging deep into the dark, damp pits of Hades,
    A dog with three heads... and a mouth full of rabies,
    Approaches my being - there he stares into my heart broken,
    I sling my hand into my pocket, and whip out a token,
    The black robed figure sails over to me on his wooden raft,
    Reaches out a boney hand, and slams down his crooked staff,
    I slip the token into his grasp - then board the little ship,
    Off we go - my second wind, as I cross the river styx,
    To me his eyes played tricks, on whether or not this was real,
    and atmosphere to unique, was the only thing that could make me feel -
    so weird and tingly on the inside - as we floated down this stream,
    My visions began to change and I had thought this was a dream,
    Now I know this is reality - and I must bring it crashing down,
    A second wind of racism storms by and whites still are the kings crowned,
    This river is a chain reaction of words mis-spoken by the iggnorant,
    Arrogant... souls and it is passed down to the kids form the rents,
    As I finally make it to the other side of this giagantic puddle,
    This is when the human race, begins to realize our struggle,
    These un-spoken words never made their actual spring,

    "If I had 2 chances... first I'd try peace, then war."
    Signed ,Sincerely yours

    Dr. Martin Luther King
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!

  2. #2
    ToTheTop Steven William's Avatar
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    Last edited by Steven William; July 25th, 2005 at 08:21 PM
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!

  3. #3
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    That's two links, please, not one.
    ...

  4. #4
    ToTheTop Steven William's Avatar
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    Bump
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!

  5. #5
    Whiiteboy Daz's Avatar
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    Approaches my being - there he stares into my heart broken,
    I sling my hand into my pocket, and whip out a token,
    The black robed figure sails over to me on his wooden raft,
    Reaches out a boney hand, and slams down his crooked staff,
    I slip the token into his grasp - then board the little ship,
    Off we go - my second wind, as I cross the river styx,
    To me his eyes played tricks, on whether or not this was real

    iloved this part of it. The imagery the flow the whole scheme of it
    Plus the mythological aspect of the whole thing. Def wassup.

    Go peep my Diss. "Allow me to reintroduce myself."
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


    Supermod Me.

  6. #6
    TreaZoN sILLable's Avatar
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    your imagery was tight..some of your structure was too bunched togethre but over all this piece was tight...keep droppin and elevatin.~1`


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  7. #7
    ToTheTop Steven William's Avatar
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    up.
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!

  8. #8
    Newbie
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    Good stuff nice story
    but like most black rappers (im guessin your black)
    you added the whole whites being racist thing....thats not all true
    good stuff though

    U-Neek
    <--~--.:..::...:::....::::U-Neek::::....:::...::..:.--~-->

  9. #9
    Im WHITE.

    -SyaNidal
    And They Said
    I Was Gone...


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    ...But It Looks To
    Me, Like I'm Back

  10. #10
    Be Safe!!! Lingwistik's Avatar
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    yah, nice piece man, the flow was consistent, the lmagery and symbolism were great, painted a clea picture in my head. The topic was cool too, and it had great storytelling. All in all a very good read, check out my shit in my profile.

    Peace

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  11. #11
    ToTheTop Steven William's Avatar
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    This needs more feed.
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!

  12. #12
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Ace the Prophet's Avatar
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    nice imagery man. personally, i dont like most of these story-telling, lots of vocab using, more poetic type raps, but you still made it hot. your message was clear. i like how you used the MLK quote at the end, it was tight. but yeah, i'd like to see another piece from you sometime, you seem pretty tight. so yeah, im out man. keep it up and keep elevatin. peace
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  13. #13
    up.
    And They Said
    I Was Gone...


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    ...But It Looks To
    Me, Like I'm Back

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