We Don't Care/Born to Kill and Queenstyle

[Q.S]

Doesn't look like it, sweetie!

People are lame in here...

lol true...

But I'll try and get some of my peepz 2 leave feed!

[sl!ck]

this piece was a nice read, you emphasised the age thing very well, i felt Born was more complex with it while Queeny was to the point, a good combination.. the vocab was nice, thought it could've done with a bit more creativity. i liked the imagery of the comparisons, specially the coming home parts. good piece guys.

8/10

[ILLunatic]

Born to Kill, this was very different from what I am use to you doing. Almost seemed like you was speaking from experience. Vocab was there, flow was consistant, and the way you explained the imagery, was very nice. No doubt this was an interesting read.

Queenstyle, your verse was consistant & simple. But this is proof, simplicity goes along way. Your verse was very interesting as well. Just like born to kill, seemed like you were speaking from experience. Although you didn't have drastic vocab, I enjoyed reading your piece. Keep it up baby girl.

Nice collab you two.

[Q.S]

Thank you guys for the excellent feedback!
Finally this shit gets decent replies.

[DaGyrlRemarqabL]

What's up you two...I thought this was a good collab...both of you brought different styles to the table with verses that still blended well in terms of doing justice to the topic...very nice...

BTK, you did an amazing job setting the scene and the mood of the piece...A lot of imagery in the hotel line and the lines that followed, really just made the reader feel a part of that secrecy and sort of 'taboo' situation that you were getting involved in...Your rhyme scheme was nearly flawless, smooth read all around...

"If we married and you missed the wedding...
......................You’d mistake her for my daughter at reception.
But upon closer inspection, you’d see it’s real between us...
And no, we’re not the same age, but love don’t care bout convenience.
Now I know I’m no genius, but with our success, I flirt...
Mornings for her’ll mean college, for me they’ll mean work."

That was the best part in my opinion, those lines, one right after another. Really nice job...

Queen...you put a nice feminine perspective on the piece...Trying to voice the independence of the young one in love...you did that well..There's definitely a lot of room for elevation as far as your overall rhyme scheme, but mostly I enjoyed reading your part also...These were my favorite lines from you:

"It doesn’t even matter, can’t they see that we don’t care
how can seeing two people in love be so much to bear?

One day we’ll find happiness with no one in the way
……..I’ll be wakin up beside you every night & day
We’ll be finally married, free and happy at last……
I made my own decisions ……without needing to ask"

Nice job..

Makes me want to start posting on here again.

[Q.S]

^ RB's 1st lady giving me feedback... DAYUM! Thanx sis.
You actually took the time to read it and feel it. Best feed.

[CAMROK]

yea, i thought this was a pretty awesome piece you two put together here. I think you've gotten more feedback in the past hour or so, then you did when first posted though. All is good. It deserves the feed...

B2k.. always comes nice, of everyone on rb always one of the nicest flows and ways of writing, atleast to me. Never been a OM that I wasn't really feeling. This here had nice lines, nice concepts.. everything about it was pretty nice. And Queen was pretty dope as well. A bit more simplistic (obvious), but I dont think things need to be complex to be good always. Good shit within the piece, nice flow, nice read overall.. one curious question though, is it at all true? I was just thinking that, doesn't have to be answered. Keep up..

[Born To Kill]

Damn!

This came back to life...

Thanks, ya'll!

[Jay Walker]

This was cool; wasn't that artistic really, but still not a bad written piece at all. There needed to be more to it though. The idea was there, but the nitty gritty was missing. Still a cool piece that i enjoyed reading. Oh, uh Queen's rhyme scheme's were kinda bland, still, cool shit . Keep writing.

[Q.S]

^ lol hey! at least you're honest. Thanx!