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Last edited by Illus'; November 23rd, 2008 at 02:48 PM
dont say im a noob im not, ive been on rb since 04 september anyway ima leave feed on this cuz none of these dumb noobs leaves feed or follows the rules so im gonna leave feed
the stucture is very good the flow is very good the imagery is very good kinda random type of style but i like this piece still the vocabulary is very good and im feeling this piece a lot man. the emotion is on point imagery was good and i was overall feeling this man good job i have seen some better shit from you in the past but this is still good, probably didnt even take you long to do this.
but anyway can you rtf here: http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=211112
1
yah man, it's true as well, the flow was good, not offkey at all, the vocab fit the verse fine, no need to change anything, the points your hit on were pretty true, it's a damn good reason to leave, but it's sad to see someone leave for this reason, well it was a great verse. I do have one question, when you said "to escape their race", are you implying that you need to be a certain race to rap? Just a question.
peace
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Thanks appreciate the feed back and yeah at
Articulate It was a quick keystyle...whatever
How I felt at the time just keyed....
"I do have one question, when you said "to escape their race", are you implying that you need to be a certain race to rap? Just a question."
Quote Ling...
Nah just means they come on here and no one knows who they are what race they are however in reality individuals know their race and get picked on because of it, so when They come on this site they act something they totally are not..
thanks for feed I will leave feed Articulate.
As for me leaving , just left my crew IJL
just wanna do me long story my drawings and ish.
iight cool, yah i see what you sayin now, will you reply to mine please, it's in my sig
but yah, again sick piece, peace
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people that call wack emcees n00bs are ruining the culture motherfucker. your ruining the culture.
This was real. The flow was there throughout it all except for the very end, which REALLY fucked it up. And because of the short lines and lack of description of what U were trying to get through in certain parts it caused me to have to re-read. Never should have to do that. But that was pretty much the only bad thing, I could feel Ur emotion in this, as if U were pist about it...because it really showed in the piece. The vocabulary was up to par and the multies were dope as fuck. Not bad...
8/10
Farewell man.
ight just to let u no before i post im not a newb this is just an alias ive been here for a long time. i thought it was really good and really true. it was very original this is the first open mic ive seen about this topic so good job.
^^whatever hahaha
very ill piece...and the more amazing thing to me is how true it is......your vocab was very ill...wordplay ill...emotion and rhyme scheme was very ill....imagery was ill.....creativity and consistency was very ill.....all in all this piece was very ill....on a more personal note,i to agree with what your sayin.Ive noticed tha difference from 2000, to now how many noobs are amongst us,of course rapbattles has changed alot as it is,it hopefully will pull back together...once again though....very ill piece...keep droppin tha hottness if you stay lol.~1`
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Thanks for the replies...appreciated.
and Vylint thanks for your opinion you bird
brain.
good shit yo.....i like the fact that u killin noobs in this shit lol...creativy was sick yo..stay up....check my open mic..it's coming soon
yo wackus rapper u aint prepard for wat im bout to do/Originally Posted by Articulate
a noob aint killin the culture he about to kill u/
i dont think wack got a clue/
uve been in it since 04 and im better than u/
then how u gonna say that u better than me/
when u eatin mac and cheese and thats the only cheddar u see/
u gonna be in a box while i got ur bitch on her knees/
please ima tell u where and when cuz i dont give a fuck/
u come down u gettin stomped on jus change ur name to young buck/
jus come and try ur luck/
but i aint scared ill let u kno i keep the gun tucked/
nigga u a chickenhead and u bout to get ur feathers plucked/
and u u a bitch in the game/
u dont even rap its a god dam shame/
but i got to ask u y u ridin his dick/
so im bout to have to murk dibitch syndicate/
wen i see u u gonna try to turn your back/
u can bring a vest i got shells to eat through that/
any bodywho want it fuck it come on but bring a lunch motherfucker
i see u bugzy these niggas dont want it with the team sonthats wat im bringin 4 these niggas that want war im callin that bitch ass nigga syndicate and wakus rappa yall bitches and that nigga articulture holla at the kid
Last edited by pnutgottheox; August 6th, 2005 at 11:46 PM
^ Point proven wdf...? lol
Point proven like whoa...
Now let me give my two cents on this piece...
I love the concept you went with here because you are speaking on a real issue. You also worked it out very nicely with clear pictures that give an example of the theory you were speaking on. The emotion was definitely there, you expressed how you stand towards certain things in a powerful way. The vocab was on point and your flow was very good: internal rhyming really improved the flow and your lines were also rather short so no stretched out shit.
Solid piece and oh so true...sadly enough...
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