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Thread: Echoes of Love

  1. #1
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    Echoes of Love

    Echoes of Love



    Passions of caring rations, involved a love which echoed a far
    Gazing raptures of engagement captures a thought like a shooting star
    A destined occurrence, life’s obstacles hurt this, but love is permanent
    Divorce settles disputes, but a way to solve is determinant
    Repetitive connections, cause romance extensions in dark places
    But a half empty heart swallowed love whole, filling the spaces
    Orgasm of sound, yet a natural profound, a beauty seen to stare
    With bundles of rose peddles, laid across the bed spread everywhere
    The moaning echoes of gestures, caused a sudden vibration in time
    Only heard as silence to herself, described as an emotional mime
    Hand to hand, life contemplates and congratulates a born child
    Future holds dynasties of baby legacies with every name filed
    A close relationship locked with a fastened lip, as vow of love
    Lurking the house with a perking smirk, love filled the air like doves
    Romantic hours redeem stressful powers, like taking medication
    Soothing skin rests on my aching limbs, such a solace sensation
    A loving care, plenty stare on jealous wounds of lacking a mate
    But love at first sight controlled the night, destiny chose the fate
    Never-ending echo, screams of impaling pain arouses a sound
    Surrounding care around, a destined apex disturbs the town
    Climax of heart attacks, chest drenched with sweat from restless sex
    Glaring at each others pupil’s, still engaging in echoed dialects
    midnight conversations, relations of romance in the peaceful setting
    blistered eyes impair the glaring stare, such an unbearable resting
    Sweat blunders the vision, reminiscing on the last soft bliss kiss
    The concaved love torn apart, ditched in abyss, no more exists
    .
    .
    .

    An unbeatable relationship, the candle of love lit, blessed with each
    I think back on the echoes of love, one last time I say rest in peace
    Last edited by comadose; June 14th, 2005 at 04:44 PM

  2. #2
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    Very nice piece full of imaginary and everything just gathered together made this a wonderful piece...but i would love to see more topical pieces with more multi's because it adds alot to the piece that i enjoyed....But i thank you for writing such a great piece and it was worth a read...i hope you elevate spiritually,lyrically,emotionally...and PSYHICALLY....God Bless
    PM for battle

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  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jay Says...
    i hope you elevate spiritually,lyrically,emotionally...and PSYHICALLY....God Bless
    lol.

    Dope read K to the ost.


    Your rhyme scheme seemed more solid throughout the piece, and your flow was alot better. your vocabulary was on a high level again, but this time, it wasnt to the point that it would slow the flow. each read seems to get better dude, so keep it up. this was a deep, illin piece dude.

    You really think ur tough... come 'n try me man
    I’ll get a hiccup that isn’t spasms of the diaphragm

  5. #5
    Wordbenders Jawn Raw's Avatar
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    nice imagery good cpmplexity nice stucture very good flow some multiples in there a lot like me i'd have to say. but shit man you elevated a lot i'd like to do a collab with you man. but overall i was feeling it lots of good creativty and emotion. caught the readers eye fast.

    rtf links in the sig

  6. #6
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    The Vocabulary Was Amazing...Very Deep Piece, Obviously U Put Some Time Into This. I Was Very Interested After Reading The First Line. No Doubt One Of The Best Pieces I Have Seen...

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    -Record-
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    -Merked Niggas-
    .........

    -Battles need voting-


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  7. #7
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    Thanks everyone.

    Upp

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    Uppp ?

  9. #9
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    But a half empty heart swallowed love whole, filling the spaces
    Orgasm of sound, yet a natural profound, a beauty seen to stare
    With bundles of rose peddles, laid across the bed spread everywhere
    The moaning echoes of gestures, caused a sudden vibration in time
    ^my favorite segment...i love the wording

    I like the idea to do a peice based on a picture. You're vocab and
    descriptiveness is your strong pt. I mean really worth the read. a
    couple of more multis wouldn't hurt the content tho. Anyways
    a pleasure to read look forward to catching more of your stuff.

    1-2

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    Thnx.

    Up.

  11. #11
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    Upppppppp.

    C'mon

  12. #12
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    the fuck .

    up

  13. #13
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    hum... great imaginative peice.. really easy to read and i liked the flow.... the topic was good and i enjoyed the rhymes,but would like to see multies and anywayz liked the flow and structure.. good job with this.. your gonna be better and improve in the future.. good job again

  14. #14
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    Uppin

  15. #15
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    Climax of heart attacks, chest drenched with sweat from restless sex
    Glaring at each others pupil’s, still engaging in echoed dialects


    i loved this line..



    great descriptive detail used, yet simple. i liked it
    Soldi throughout, flowed well blah blah blah..

    but at the end of the day its the story painted with words that made this sutch a great piece.
    Almost like there was a counter story inside it..of a battle or fight...when they where actually having sex.
    Great piece, another great read from you kost.

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