we as americans

[ninjaboy]

we as americans... as a citizen... look at how shit has been...
... to protect ourselves... as americans...

see as americans, we have a reputation
it's being tarnished now, and people they test my patience
take a step back from it all, look at the situation
economy starts to fall, global humiliation
wasting time overseas, well what about our own shores
cuz here on the streets, us teens fight our own wars
cops reaching quotas, by untightening holstas,
listen up wontcha u aint frightening soldiers.
one of the flaws, is these guns being sold
plenty of laws, but they still aint controlled
plenty of kids, who won't live to grow old
they'll end up in a ditch, so alone layin cold
and we don't wanna allow marriage of the same sex
so we march through the streets, and carry on with our protests
"adam and steve is evil, that shouldn't even be legal"
yo tell me what the fuck is wrong with these people
when you live in a house where the grown-ups are so ignorant
tell me how are the kids supposed to grow up different
okay they're disciplined, but not informed, what's missin is
a talking to, so here's the mic, we're listenin

[YoungHusla]

well first off bite off eminEm with idea, and most of the lil hook, but not bad
the shit u wrote urself i mean...

[ninjaboy]

rock$ - rock to the money sign

gene pool - passing divinity

[ninjaboy]

it was supposed to be an added verse to ems song, i forgot to put that, and the lil hook thing is completely his, it's supposed to be his hook fading in and out. then my verse.

[YoungHusla]

o ight yeah i understand now, tite then dawg

[XM]

nice shit there i got watcha was talkin bout

[MXC]

thias is descent
keep up the work

[ninjaboy]

thanx for the feeds, but maybe i could get some more, a little in depth? thanx tho

[Gene Pool]

it wasn't bad for an easy read, mighta done better if it was a lil more extended though.
the last line I wasn't feelin flow got dropped due to structure seemed to me that u were just kinda rushin that part and wanted to get the verse done so try takin a little bit more time with what u write. some more vocab and complexity would make this verse for a hot piece but as far as flow go's it was alright stayed on point mostly way through and the message here was delivered quite well. an alright job with this but nothin to special keep droppin man. peace.

[ninjaboy]

thanx, up for more