Falling Apart

[Daz]

The night claps, wind fights back the breeze brings pain
With life's facts all tight packed i bleed from these veins
We might act, like things change but really we know
that time wraps, and brings age and the feelings we've grown
Healings we've shown, are false and dont provide truth
Feeling alone, and lost, who can you lie to?
How do you hide you?, from mirror and rain drops
Who can you cry to? when does the fear of the pain stop?
Pride of fools, thinking that peoples's hurt vanishes
Damages, dealt with the evil the hurt handed in
Damning sin, Felt that the product of life was half-assed
It's that bad,riddles unanswered like dude with the mad hat
That passed, a bad fad, nothing left to free it
Rap Ad's, life falling apart crushing my soul beneath it

Replied to BTK and Nique

[ThE kId BiG]

^^^ nice, is this a beef? who started it? mine is betta... lol, jk

[AbusivE]

This was a good peice... Topic was good, you came creative with it...multis were very good, emotion was also strong, it was structured pretty well..but yeah i was likin the emotion in this.. the last two lines were good, i liked em.. good drop!

[AbusivE]

wtf @ kid big.. Try reading the verse before postin

[Daz]

Up.

[Foreshadow]

This was a nice read daz. I thought that the story was nice and it flowed well. I liked the mulites in this because it really added soemthing to this piece. I think that there was a metaphor in there as well and overall I thought this was a nice drop.

[Daz]

Thank you. OM of the month?

[Expo.]

The night claps, wind fights back the breeze brings pain
With life's facts all tight packed i bleed from these veins

- well put, liked the way you constructed it.. couldn't
have put it any better, liked the flow, emotion too. great bar.

We might act, like things change but really we know
that time wraps, and brings age and the feelings we've grown

- truth there.. nothing more to say, just stands out.

Healings we've shown, are false and dont provide truth
Feeling alone, and lost, who can you lie to?

- ill. nuff said, that alone gets you OM of the month for sure..

How do you hide you?, from mirror and rain drops
Who can you cry to? when does the fear of the pain stop?
Pride of fools, thinking that peoples's hurt vanishes
Damages, dealt with the evil the hurt handed in
Damning sin, Felt that the product of life was half-assed
It's that bad,riddles unanswered like dude with the mad hat
That passed, a bad fad, nothing left to free it
Rap Ad's, life falling apart crushing my soul beneath it

- had to quote the entire section emotion and flow just wrecked it, tight shit, liked it, like, sick. keep ya headup and keep droppin. short piece, but still good..


OM of the month son.

[Chris Black]

Dope shit. The flow and rhymescheme are crazy. It's got emotion. Overall, an really easy and good read. Keep up the good work.

[Daz]

Thank you Mr. Black

[Frontrunner]

The sheer creativity of this piece was nice....I see you put thought into your words....as well as you held down a nice rhyme scheme throughout...good multies....it was a very witty drop....nice job son......keep it up


Aye could ya return the favor on one the links in my sig........1

[Daz]

Hi.

[Daz]

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