...Call Of Duty...

[Awaken]

Novacain - My One Uniqueness Is My Deepness
Atticus & Ideph - Metal Mulisha

Title - Call Of Duty
Author - Awaken

Lt. James Dilks Class. Sniper
...Erie nights pass by, tension grips life with a vast sigh...
It's like time doesn't matter, war shatters and smashes cries
...Lights flashing by, bomb speciments deliver soldier's testiments...
Deep in trenches, we get drunk, but I'm the sober specialist
...Hand tight on gun, ready for war, instinct, steady for sure...
Foreskin rotted ashore, bones shattered, my rank, already adored
...My aim is precision, don't make this shot, It's my fame I'll be missing...
Covered in leaves, sand, trees and a hint of death, my reign's a collision
...As I pull the trigger, lead injects into a pool of blood, figures...
I missed my target, spotted my position, my spine, full of shivers
...So the bullet is delivered, but not from the barrel of my rifle...
Enemy is approaching quickly, swiftly...with more power than a disciple
...Once hit, my lungs'll shift, opening up a tunnel of bliss...
And my instinct, loses his wish, to follow the myth
...The one that shows I'm invisible, well I'm not invisible today...
I stodd up slowly with pace, knowing my life is at stake
...Four men within ten feet, firing as each of the bullets race...
To strike my conscience, unity was not there, so I was called for duty

R.I.P James Dilks
1900 - 1942

[Awaken]

i guiess I wrote this for nothing then.

[noncentz]

i like this as a soldier and someone who faught in baghdad i relate very well you captured alot of thoughts that any soldier can relate to its some scary shit out there sometimes your bravery is your only allie this was well done i hope to see more from u

[Novacain]

This was nice...

You had emotion at its peak, i was really feeling this. The imagery was a bit left out, but you had enough just to grab my attention

Your rhyme scheme was above par, your structure was hot, pretty much the whole piece was on point

One thing, i think it ended pretty abruptly, maybe make the last line into two lines would of gave it that finished feeling

Overall, a very nice drop

Keep up the work man, peace

[Awaken]

Thanks to all who replied.
Fuck everyone else........

[Awaken]

...what the fuck
24 views? 2 replies? u guys are pretty pathetic

[Swift Death]

i liked it even though i don't like disscusing the topic unless im debating against it but nicely done here had nice thoughts of the mind portrayed over all you did well, would be nice to see more imagery in this maybe add a lil more of a story to it but its also good just how it is keep it up

check out sour beer sawdust and urine if you have a chance

[STAT$]

This was nice....good topic imagery was nice, vocab, flow, everything was on point good drop.......

[Facts Machine]

nice multis and concept very creative. dope peice.

[Kein Witz]

Pretty good concept. Dedicated to someone...perhaps your grandfather? I'm trying to think which war he would be in. The multies were good, structure was good...nice vocabulary, also. Ended a bit suddenly, but it had me reading it throughout it...Keep dropping, man.

[Kein Witz]

Pretty good concept. Dedicated to someone...perhaps your grandfather? I'm trying to think which war he would be in. The multies were good, structure was good...nice vocabulary, also. Ended a bit suddenly, but it had me reading it throughout it...Keep dropping, man.

[Awaken]

^^nah it wasn't dedicated to someone, just a topic to write on. And I'm gonna try and fix up the ending tonight, I agree i ended it abruptly, thanks for the comments.