1st drop in a long ass time...its called "where can i go"

[YJ]

I wrote this to Nas' - if I ruled the world
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=166920
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=166683

God, I cant sleep cuz theres violence in our streets
theres no sign of improvement, Lord they'll never be peace
with all this hatered outside a nigga's door step
plus these new niggaz swearin they have a hardcore rep
the only shit I believe in is the bloods and the crips
the real bitches are the fake thugs with the clips
we got blacks tryna kill blacks with the gats
Rap which is beyond real, which is straight whack
sendin negative messages to the ghetto youth
but not me nigga, cuz like some, I speak the truth
tell me who knows a peaceful place where I can go
like Pac said to clear my head when I'm feelin low
tell me, is there a place where we'll all be able to shine
a place where racism, selfishness and crime
never come to mind, cuz death is my last request
no more suicidal tendencies cuz I'm blessed
lyrically and also tryin to plant seeds in a lady
and relax, puffin weed as I watch my babies
advance in life, watchin my seeds grow
prayin not to be at any of their funeral watchin them go

[lyrically_insane]

pretty tight rap bro...im also a Nas fan....i like the whole drop xcept towards the end it kinda got a lil wack...overall bout 7.5/10...keep droppin tho!

[Mag...]

not bad for this type of shit... kinda simple stuff but it wouldn't sound bad outloud...

suggestion... think of something really original to say about the situation ... maybe a new way to look at it

use a metaphor or something... because this is all been said

["fi-del"]

not to bad, a solid amount of emotion. good wordplay.

[Kill.]

well this was decent..........i wasnt really feelin this..........i hear shit just like this all the time so it didnt really stand out..............you should really try and put in some creativity and metephores to spice it up and make it more interesting

[Kill.]

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...1&page=1&pp=15
Hit this up aight