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Thread: Cry For Help

  1. January 13th, 2005, 04:19 PM #1
    Steven William
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    Cry For Help


    Check it...
    As far back as I remember... I was always dope...
    Everybody out there, loved everything that I wrote,
    and Nope, I aint signed... but yall know I'm hot...
    People say "Yea, look hes wack", My skills show I'm not,
    Sometimes though, I'm like... I think that I'm not Ill...
    And then the world just stops, stomach sick, is how I feel,
    Then my mind juss fills... Then see my imagination runs wild...
    Hense I find muh will, Other Emcees creations? Just Mild,
    So Now I find it near... The time I hold so dear...
    Though How I wind my fear, just rhyme into my wholesome ears,
    Now all I see is green... Has nothing to do with hate...
    As I sit, wish and wait, The game just sets my fate,
    I'm beatin' myself up... Got my knife in hand...
    Why needin' this help sucks, as bullets strike this man,
    Attempts at suicide... Leavin without a legacy...
    My minds blank... writers block, It's the plague of We,
    Emcees we all catch it... It's just our common cold...
    Watch us break and fold, This can't be controlled,
    So we sit back and watch... A dagger pierces through...
    Flesh just splits in two, Brain gets ripped and chewed,
    As I stab through my thoughs... Dopeness still gone...
    The game is what I rip, My creative Images are drawn,
    Bluntly beatin' down... Bruised by all this wealth...
    My past has been rewound... This call...
    .Is Just A Cry For Help.
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
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  2. January 13th, 2005, 04:27 PM #2
    Steven William
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    BTK-Advice For Mr. Mathers
    Jekyll-Impenetrable Fortress

    -SyaNidal
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
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  3. January 13th, 2005, 04:40 PM #3
    Chris Black
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    I like how the tone changed, because I thought you were just going to suck your own dick thoughout the whole piece. It was ok. Hated the beggining, but decent piece. Keep writing.

    -W1
    Hence Forward
    axis powers
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  4. January 13th, 2005, 05:10 PM #4
    AbusivE
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    This was a good peice...flow and structure were very good..multis were also there..emotion was good, could feel what you were sayin...nothin really bad to say abotu this.. good drop, i'll be lookin out for more open mics from you
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  5. January 13th, 2005, 07:21 PM #5
    Steven William
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    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
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  6. January 14th, 2005, 12:27 AM #6
    Steven William
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    Bounce!
    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
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  7. January 15th, 2005, 03:04 AM #7
    SMZ
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    emotion was evident - not captivating but certainly there - diction was coo - some awkward lines but the meaning got thru - pretty decent piece - left a pretty clear print of your thought patterns - keep at it - peace

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    I'm dead.


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    Hence Forward
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  8. January 15th, 2005, 03:25 AM #8
    djb
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    yeah the begining kinda turned me off but it got better. this was good i only caught a couple things that could have been worded differently. this was good though not great but good. i really like your last 4 lines. they made up a lot for the begining. anyways it was good.

    please drop some feed on my piece.
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=164942
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    Music --->>>>
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  9. January 15th, 2005, 03:41 AM #9
    =YaZ=
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    I like this alot, It's quite true. I like how u captured the writers block every emcee gets. Also your flow is madd ill, fo real outta 10, this is sitten on 8 an 9.
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  10. January 15th, 2005, 06:46 PM #10
    Steven William
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    ScytsoPhrenia
    CrazyDope

    Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
    "You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
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  11. January 15th, 2005, 07:05 PM #11
    onslowboy21
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    [QUOTE=SyaNidal]
    Check it...
    As far back as I remember... I was always dope...
    Everybody out there, loved everything that I wrote,
    and Nope, I aint signed... but yall know I'm hot...
    People say "Yea, look hes wack", My skills show I'm not,
    Sometimes though, I'm like... I think that I'm not Ill...
    And then the world just stops, stomach sick, is how I feel,
    Then my mind juss fills... Then see my imagination runs wild...
    Hense I find muh will, Other Emcees creations? Just Mild,
    So Now I find it near... The time I hold so dear...
    Though How I wind my fear, just rhyme into my wholesome ears,
    Now all I see is green... Has nothing to do with hate...
    As I sit, wish and wait, The game just sets my fate,
    I'm beatin' myself up... Got my knife in hand...
    Why needin' this help sucks, as bullets strike this man,
    Attempts at suicide... Leavin without a legacy...
    My minds blank... writers block, It's the plague of We,
    Emcees we all catch it... It's just our common cold...
    Watch us break and fold, This can't be controlled,
    So we sit back and watch... A dagger pierces through...
    Flesh just splits in two, Brain gets ripped and chewed,
    As I stab through my thoughs... Dopeness still gone...
    The game is what I rip, My creative Images are drawn,
    Bluntly beatin' down... Bruised by all this wealth...
    My past has been rewound... This call...
    .Is Just A Cry For Help.    [/QU
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  12. January 15th, 2005, 07:07 PM #12
    onslowboy21
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    I think the shits hot, keep it coming pimp.
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  13. January 15th, 2005, 07:32 PM #13
    Chronic Cancer
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    Dope shit ......Keep this shit comin............
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  14. January 15th, 2005, 07:56 PM #14
    conquistador
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    this was great I am jealous because your imagery was better than mine...seriously
    <div style='font-size: 11pt;'><center>
    <embed name='RAOCXplayer' src='http://videocodes4u.com/video/file_39227.asx' autostart='true' type='application/x-mplayer2' width='300' height='250' showcontrols='1' showstatusbar='0' loop='True' enablecontextmenu='0' displaysize='0' pluginspage='
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
    Jay-Z - Excuse Me Miss - Featuring Pha...
    <br>
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    </center></div>
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  15. January 15th, 2005, 08:10 PM #15
    Omniscient
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    Yo this was good...the beginning was kind of off but it got better round da middle parts and stuff...good vocab and flow...overall 8/10 good drop man
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