User Tag List

Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Showing results 1 to 15 of 19

Thread: Camping For A Weekened

  1. #1
    Word Of Mouth Kaotic Theory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Grizzly City, California
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,160
    Battle Record
    16-5
    Awards PC HOF OM HOF

    Camping For A Weekened

    camping for a weekend

    it was a warm and beautiful day, not a cloud in the sky
    the weather on the news said to expect a ninety five degrees high
    i then thought to myself what a perfect day to camp outdoors
    fondly excited i called a special friend who i happen to adore
    and invited her to enjoy a weekened of camping in the mountains
    she was usually fun and outgoing, but did alot of pouting
    but none the less i really enjoyed her company
    lately we havent had time alone, so i wanted to do something

    and off we went set to go camping for a few days in the wilderness
    to me it was fun and exciting, but to her it was just plain filthyness
    we set camp at a small camp ground near a small creek
    the site was beatiful , but the odor in the area really reeked
    but i wouldn't let that stop me, so i spent the evening fishing
    although lisa my friend brought her radio and sat there listening
    to her favorite talk show, later we made a fire and held conversations
    about our friendship and possibly relationship all the way to our vacation
    then proceeded to our tents for some rest and shut eye
    because on day two me and my friend travel on a 6 mile tough hike

    it was now seven o'clock in the mourning and we got set for our walk
    during that hike we came a cross a few deer and magnificent waterfalls
    took a few pictures to record what we have seen
    then made our way back to the camp grounds to rinse our selves clean
    but on our way back lisa suddenly tripped and stumbled a few feet
    she cry'ed outloud in terrible pain, but came to find out she sprained her knee
    i carried her back to the camping grounds and bandaged her sprain
    she got scared and continued to scream out in throbbing pain

    we then had no choice but to return home to a local hospital for help
    i can't say i was too happy because i wasn't feeling to good myself
    i happened to receive a bunch of mosquito bites all over my body
    it itched so bad i was reconsidering on making outdoors my hobbie
    i must say the weekened started out pretty fun and enjoyable
    i could of never thought lisa was so interested and lovable

    it has now been six very crucial weeks since our crazy trip
    lisa and i are considering going again, this time with an aid kit
    so we are prepared for anything dangerous that may happen
    i must say if lisa was to get hurt again, i would be saddened
    but for now i will enjoy my time away from outdoors and wildlife
    i plan on staying safe and far away from my crazy wild side
    Last edited by Kaotic Theory; December 21st, 2004 at 10:54 PM
    AI

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  2. #2
    Word Of Mouth Kaotic Theory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Grizzly City, California
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,160
    Battle Record
    16-5
    Awards PC HOF OM HOF
    AI

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  3. #3
    Word Of Mouth Kaotic Theory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Grizzly City, California
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,160
    Battle Record
    16-5
    Awards PC HOF OM HOF
    uppin
    AI

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  4. #4
    jizza
    Guest
    It was a good drop and everything, but it didn't peak my interest. I like verse's that have a deeper meaning, you were just telling a story in a wordy way. The rhyme scheme and everything was on point; the subject just didn't catch me.

  5. #5
    You did a lil bit too much...you should beable to get ya point across in a cple of bars...it was aight tho dawg, save the best for last that how i feel
    HARLEM STAND UP!!!!!!!!

  6. #6
    Banned
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    South Carolina
    Age
    38
    Posts
    1,202
    Battle Record
    19-13
    overall this wasnt a bad drop...your flow was ok...and your structure build up was fine...i liked your choice of the topic..i think you handled it well..you worded most of your lines pretty descent..i think you did a good job on that...your imagery was pretty good also..overall nice drop man..

  7. #7
    Administrator ILLunatic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    21,708
    Battle Record
    124-23
    Awards 100+ Wins OM HOF SOTW
    It was an ok drop, but I think that you tried to hard.
    The word choice in a few of the lines, was poor
    It could have been better, but atleast you tried.
    This drop had me interested here and there
    but I kept getting thrown off. Which aggrivated me
    But in the end, it was a decent drop.
    Just work on the word usage, and try throwin in wordplay.


    Add & Follow

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
    ·
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


  8. #8
    Banned
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    South Carolina
    Age
    38
    Posts
    1,202
    Battle Record
    19-13

  9. #9
    jizza
    Guest
    some of y'all are on some dicks man.......this shit had no point

  10. #10
    Administrator ILLunatic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    21,708
    Battle Record
    124-23
    Awards 100+ Wins OM HOF SOTW
    Are you saying i'm on his dick?


    Add & Follow

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
    ·
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


  11. #11
    Word Of Mouth Kaotic Theory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Grizzly City, California
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,160
    Battle Record
    16-5
    Awards PC HOF OM HOF
    jizza is gay....

    uppin this piece
    AI

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  12. #12
    jizza
    Guest
    awwwww, I'm gay cause I didn't like your piece and I'm not scared to say it........

  13. #13
    Administrator ILLunatic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    21,708
    Battle Record
    124-23
    Awards 100+ Wins OM HOF SOTW
    How bout ya'll do a topical battle...




    ...then...




    ...winner battles me to lose


    Add & Follow

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
    ·
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


  14. #14
    Word Of Mouth Kaotic Theory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Grizzly City, California
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,160
    Battle Record
    16-5
    Awards PC HOF OM HOF
    lol i luh illunatic....
    but no jizza is no compotition
    AI

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  15. #15
    Administrator ILLunatic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    21,708
    Battle Record
    124-23
    Awards 100+ Wins OM HOF SOTW
    Lol.. alrighty then, skip him


    And come lose to me (again)


    Add & Follow

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
    ·
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Similar Threads

  1. My camping trip...
    By Swift Death in forum Member Pictures
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: February 7th, 2005, 08:47 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •