First Post Song called Dont Kno why audio n text n imgs

[TechOmega]

replied to
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...08#post1790908
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...10#post1790910

copy n paste for hi fi link below
http://www.soundclick.com/util/strea...D=1660279&q=Hi
copy n paste for lo fi link below
http://www.soundclick.com/util/strea...D=1660279&q=Lo
copy n paste for download of the song link below
http://www.soundclick.com/util/Downl...cfm?ID=1621441



Is it childish/i went to college/
to gain money rather learn n gain knowledge/
buy the style where the style is stylish/


Never paid for joy but everything else i brought/
T's conrorws nikes ya boy is sharp/
money still shinin even when its world is dark/
and yet I was taught/
makin cash dont make you smart/
i onno why i loved you from the start/
cause you only tore apart/
The love i kept in my heart/

I moved my feets in west/in the wrong direction/
fell n love up to my chest/wit a material possesion/
yet it only added stress/and kept me stressin/
now a days you only f/excess and keep f'n/
never wanted you for sex/but u was a object for obession/
chorus ( lady singin i dont know why I love you)
(drugs)

Been through alot so i kno pain/in vain with no shame/
and i loved the way cocain/would flow blow my brain/like propain/

When my parents faught went to war/
my heart was sore for sure
but drugs opened the door/
had my nose beggin for more/
1's by the 2's and 3's by the four/
Yet i got addicted to this meanin/
blood fell everytime i was sneezin/
and please believe im not even close to leavin/
still sniffin like im smellin a deeper meanin/

my friends gave it to me...yeah some friends/
a life of pain n sadness with no end/
said it was just a trend/
now im losin this battle tryin to win/
but this pain just wont break and the pain wont end/
chorus ( lady singin i dont know why I love you)

(sex)
My hearts sick out help/
cause i learned sex is bad for health/
cheated my girl n made her heart melt/
sex got me lovin sex more then love it's self/
when love shouldbve been her my greatest wealth/
not the job i got done under the belt/
not the feelin..but more how the heart felt/

onno kno why im tryin to change minds on a song/
when im the one who's doing the most wrong/
tell me why i try to keep fightin when im the not that strong/
why i try to reach so far but never hold on

tell me why i love money drugs sex and hoes/
rather then my inner beauty and my beatiful soul//



tell me why true love begins to split/
why rap isnt legit why best friends submit and quit/
why a autistic kid cant grab the mic and rip//
tell me why i dont kno why aint the greatest hit//



chorus ( lady singin i dont know why I love you)

[Johnny 6-feet]

an original approach to posting an open mic. those audio links should really be in the audio section. the subject material was pretty standard though. i thought the first verse was the strongest since you seemed to be leaning more towards multis and real life stuff there. i think some uppin of your vocab wuldnt hurt, not to mention some specific imagery of what this charecter went through.

keep writing and and elavating.

p.s. could you do me a favour and rep one of my pieces? id appriciate it.

[TechOmega]

yeah no doubt the story's character is actualy me hahah u caught on well fam that its based on some trueness some people felt it was another song
hmm i got few text/songs were i use bigger vocab i just felt the need to keep it simple but i think ur rite few things could be improved
good lookin out n ill return the favor n 1 sec

[Foreshadow]

Unique none the less but I wasnt really interested in the piece all that much.

[TechOmega]

word its all good truthfully its ment for audio but i have better text ill drop later
1