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Thread: clarity through my seed

  1. #1
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    clarity through my seed

    why must i act like a father at the age of eighteen
    chances to expirience childish things escaped me
    left feelin empty, still not grown but raising a seed
    being punished for lack of clarity, witness desparity
    look in my eyes to see a life long sacrafice
    wasted my youth to raise another right
    can't believe what i coulda been
    but because one night of passion
    i lost my friends and gained responsablity
    feelin lousy, lost, and left being lonely
    im in need of a true friend to hold me
    phony is the lifestyle thats over hyped
    it aint right livin life regreting one night
    now im stuck as a role model at too early an age
    living with decisions i made, in pain,the worst way
    too cool for condoms, that is just an oxymoron
    like how a one night stand cant be prolonged
    my god, please, what did i get myself into
    the wrong girl without thinking it through
    i guess it's my own fault, maybe i should have listened to my pop
    parents can be right, thought not, now i gotta live with what i got
    a kid nearing age three constantly looking up to me
    it's so hard to control the unforseen but im trying
    i acknowledge the mistakes that i have made
    using them to teach, patience is the road unpaved
    so someday my son will know you can go your own way
    this knowledge i will engrave in his brain and he will retain
    the fundamental values of the truth
    the world revolves around the youth
    and it's up to you, what path you choose
    lifes not a game, you dont just win or loose
    you can either follow or lead
    either way do the right thing
    and remember life is a journey and not a race
    slow down there is no thropey for first place
    especally in this case, but im not a disgrace
    cuz i have learned from the problems i faced
    and now i procliam my son will be much better then me
    for he has learned life long lessons from his dad at age 18
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  2. #2
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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  3. #3
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    anyone got some feeback for me?
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  4. #4
    nothing
    Guest
    Well, what to say? Its difficult for feedback to do such a hearfelt and skillful piece justice. Keep up you sound like you are a good father, the world needs more of those as well as good rappers.
    peace to you and your family

  5. #5
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    uppin
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  6. #6
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    are you guys alseep? uppin for honesty. drop solid feedback please. i will return the favor if wanted.
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  7. #7
    Picture Perfect elm0 da crackur's Avatar
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    returning the favour...

    I got the point after the first line, that your a father... the theme is dope, real deep shit you've got here. the beginning touched me the most, about how you have to become a role model at such an early age just because of one night.. really makes you think about consequences due to your actions.. one small thing can change some ones life, just like a bullet.. nice piece!
    You Dont Want None
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  8. #8
    Bruce Wayne
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    i liked this shit ..i like it when ppl rap about real shit other than who they killed and how much money they got.. it was deep shit..alot of messages in this writeing hope to read more from you..

  9. #9
    deine mutter BeRLin`S BesT's Avatar
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    real life situations n struggles always attract readers, especially when they're as well composed as this one...nice piece but i can imagine this being hard to spit to a beat...still I recognize the hard work...keep doin u n good luck....return da favor...pz
    Hit N Run

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  10. #10
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    thanks for the feedback guys and the favor has been returned berlin.
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  11. #11
    Banned Ill Game's Avatar
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    hey djb alot of my homies go through the same shit its tough and my cuz had her son at 15 and he is in the pen now remember to raise that young gun right dont fuck up anyways good shit right there its deep as helll please return the favor for hate this and shit ive seen

  12. #12
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    ill game that wasn't really feedback but favor returned anyway. uppin this mother
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