Soft focus: randomly better than you [w/content,fah Q, rule]

[deacon]

deacon

With no help from these mail order brides
frail disorder won't bail on our unfortunate lives,
couldnt coordinate arts passion and our jobs
just another cartrige inserted into corporate slots,


Manikins lie restless, cressoned with to do lists
As I lie blessed and bruised with truth and real limbs
Interpreting their surfaces with worthless use of two fists
I smother wisdom with hard thoughts and get rewarded
back with food stamps

FaH Q

A mind game interferes it's cause while leading to effects
Peers stumble, Won't scrap the sheet metal in this wreck
I'm outspoken provoking this rage while opposing the press
Urging for breath to grasp the opportunity that's left...


Content

I feel like a drug dealer with
all these fifty fifty cats trying
to see where my heads really at,

And being boys again now is so far
from possible when I got fifteen
narcaleptic friends that wanna
double their roster too,

But tables turn when my futures
compared to you in a hospital,
Man you lost the truth and left me,
Gods left me to let you breathe its true.

Rule

Rule Devoloped A Taste Of Forever,To Reword Phrases To Sound Clever
No Matter How Stormy The Weather, I Wont Settle For Less Then Better

-
Chances Come & Then They're Gone, Becareful Don't Hold Wishes To Long
You Can Slip & Drop What's In Your Palm, Don't Be Scared Or To Alarmed
Reach Your Personal Best & Have Fun, Never Be Scared Of What You Become
Never Reach For Less Then The Sun, Cause If You Reach For The Stars..
....Reach The Biggest One

[Thrust]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=133004
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=133168

[Qwality]

Deacon:::

With no help from these mail order brides
frail disorder won't bail on our unfortunate lives

this was really your only quoteable i found your piece was nice but it was missing depth it only scratched the surface of ideas and didnt demonstrate them properly

FaH Q

A mind game interferes it's cause while leading to effects
Peers stumble, Won't scrap the sheet metal in this wreck
I'm outspoken provoking this rage while opposing the press
Urging for breath to grasp the opportunity that's left...

for what little piece you had it was nice well rounded i liked...

Content

And being boys again now is so far
from possible when I got fifteen
narcaleptic friends that wanna
double their roster too,

But tables turn when my futures
compared to you in a hospital,
Man you lost the truth and left me,
Gods left me to let you breathe its true.

this was nice i gotta say your style is original... like i said with the first guy it dosent seem like you fully expose the content you intend to convey but nevertheless this was nice...

Rule

Rule Devoloped A Taste Of Forever,To Reword Phrases To Sound Clever
No Matter How Stormy The Weather, I Wont Settle For Less Then Better

-
Chances Come & Then They're Gone, Becareful Don't Hold Wishes To Long
You Can Slip & Drop What's In Your Palm, Don't Be Scared Or To Alarmed
Reach Your Personal Best & Have Fun, Never Be Scared Of What You Become
Never Reach For Less Then The Sun, Cause If You Reach For The Stars..
....Reach The Biggest One

i like your style i like how you set yourself up your flow was nice this was the best part of the whole piece....


overall each emcee came with a different style and each are on different levels this was a pretty good read overall i liked.... hope you can return the fav.... big upps to all of you

[Perpetual]

yea, this shit was straight
it was good for me to read
poor rhyme scheme tho
but, besides the rhyming
everything else was good
it should've been a lil onger
from all of ya,
overall, it was good
nice mix of styles to make a good crew
keep this shit up

[Thrust]

it was supposed to be 4 lines from everybody lol...

[Content]

Fah Q was the only one who followed the rules
he gets straight A's and hes fuckin special

and he still came just as nice

[deacon]

word this was a straight up cool collab...honestly i look past any critique anyone has to offer. Keep it........ This collab had it all nice job boys

-1-

[rule]

Upping...

We should get another crew collab together

[Thrust]

word..with people following the rules lol
thanks content, your sexy

[Chris Black]

Pretty nice shit. I liked the first stanza by deacon alot more than the second. Fah Q'a verse was nice. Con's shit just didn't catch with me though. It was the rhymesccheme. I couldn't get it. I fels Rule's verse the most. Overall this was a cool piece. Keep doin you fellas.

My Open Mic:http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=133021

-W1

['PercepTion']

It's been said that the rhyme scheme was
inconsistent, it should ahve been evenly
panned out between the four of you.

Deacon
you had nice imagry and your flow was pretty
good as always, preferred the first stanza th0.

Fah Q
nice flow, it had some nice fluency about it, and
seemed to roll of my tounge, nice wordplay too,
bit short but good th0. Godo luck in SS this wk!

Content:
wasn't feeling it too much, the style changed
from Deacons and Fah's, maybe thats what
put me off, but it was decent, more poetic
th0 i felt, nice th0.

Rule
You had the best flow IMO, some dope
added internals and it had a real sense
of fluency about it, you came hard with
nice imagry too...

was a decent piece, nothing extrodinary..
but nice..3/5...sorry about the short
replies but it wasn't really that long...

if you 4 got time..:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...66#post1476166

[deacon]

^^^^^just shut up will you seriously...... You couldnt even compare so why critique. Contents piece was grand but you just cant see it because your use to this cookie cutter bullshit kind of topical...move on sally

['PercepTion']

^see what happens when you critise ppl, how about you grow up and accept that not all ppl share your same views..seriosuly, i'm giving MY opinion, and why the fuck are you hating on me...i thought Wicked said about the same thing...so hop off your own dick...seriously, grow up.

[deacon]

^^No

[Thrust]

upp