u want war

[YoungChild]

i'm a threat like unprotected sex....fuck a hand me down mc...gimme the best....bet i lay his ass to rest....i'm a rookie like lybron james....with the words of a vet....u ain't know....i was borning spliting flows...mic in my hand when i came out my moms inner theigh window...so who really wanna go war...do u...maybe u....i don't think so...cuz u know what i do to fools who choose to battle this dude....crush em...along with his so called crew who love em...i guess i'm bugging...whatever the time....i don't mine.....just name the stakes...i'll treat u like a 16 year old girl....and r-kelly ya face....

[Endeva.]

first thing id say is, sort it out into some sort of bars, lay it out better even it up.... it was very basic, wasnt feeling it.... you need to work on your scheme, your flow was ok, but you need to evelate man...

[credz, ill save you a job..lol] you need to leave 2 links....

[Maven.]

to clarify...
you must reply to two other open mics and post links to the replies that you made...failure to do so will result in this thread being closed, hard-core ninja style.

[FormulaMC]

Maven is a ninja, and hardcore. . Maven, get your ass on AIM. . fucking black-hair ninja boy person you!

As for this piece. . no, just no. Structure, you need it. Flow, you need it. Solid and readable content, you need it. Work on everything, drop something, and i'll give better critique.