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Thread: Complexity

  1. #1
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    Complexity

    Aiyo,
    All of you laugh at the thought of me being serious
    but thats the cause of disasters leavin you delirious,
    these bastards collapse at the balls when I'm spittin so furious,
    Makin em relapse on their bars cause they're legitamatly rediculous.
    Never satisfying the cause of these attidtude faults is the reason of this verse.
    I'm like a nasty mother fuckin disease that will disperse,
    throughout your family and leave em sleepin in hearsts,
    even before death even thinks to step to em first.
    I'm on the brink of a break-though to a self expressant society.
    No anti-deppresant could suppress this stress thats buildin up inside of me, and until I die,
    no person could ever write a rhyme thats as emotional as mine,
    inspite of the fact that I despise any cat that battle raps like he's dieting...
    So I arrive to the conclusion that death is the only solution,
    with the exclusion of a nuclear fusion pursuit of this criminals prosecution,
    & the mind frame of this night train that wont stop no matter who the highjackers shootin.

    (Hook)
    My minds too complex cause I cant even understand it,
    these rhymes cant caress what I'm dealt underhanded,
    In time this stress will eventually due me in,
    lemme out this looney bin so i can do the same stupid shit, all over again....
    DayumNation

  2. #2
    Original Outlaw Domain 9's Avatar
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    Damn kid, that was off the chain. The flow was definately on point and the lyrical content was great. I see you have a hook so I'm guessing/hoping it's not finished. If you need a hook, you need more verses. keep it up

    pz
    Artificial Intelligence
    *~P.U.R.E.~*
    Can't Fuck With Old School



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    Damn Girl!

  3. #3
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    thanx for da feed... it feels good to get props from a mod...
    still uppin.
    A.T.
    DayumNation

  4. #4
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    great shit it had good flow and it was pretty funny.. i liked it.. would of been better if you made it longer
    holla back at mine

    Life What Is It Made Of
    Artificial Intelligence

  5. #5
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    gotcha bro...
    A.T.
    DayumNation

  6. #6
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    uppity up up uppin
    DayumNation

  7. #7
    Arsonist, Outlaw, Watcher Withersman's Avatar
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    Damn that shit was nice dawg. Great vocab amazing flow. Looking forward to see more of your stuff.
    RIP MANET

    OPEN MICS

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  8. #8
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    thanx for da feed dawg... UPPIN
    DayumNation

  9. #9
    Pot 'Ed pot1ent's Avatar
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    I should really give you the same length you did to me..But I ain't about that...

    Your flow was hyped up alot up there...I felt it was good but wasn't quite perfect...It fell of a bit...Due to not keeping a scheme...I thought your content fell off compared to your hook...If you had made your content of the piece the same as your hook it woulda been really good...It was a good read though
    Pot` Ed.

    I dropped to show RM what hot was;
    And this faggot got Butterflies in his stomach the size of Mothra

    Your text is just another weak display
    One fist to your eye'll make it go through that black album remix phase. - Saviour Arraign

    <center>The Faculty</center>

  10. #10
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    thanx dawg... still uppin
    DayumNation

  11. #11
    class of '03 Wakiyan's Avatar
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    Okay I hope this helps fam

    I liked the hook it's great. The wordplay is good, clever enough and you displayed extensive vocab. The structure is solid and it has a nice flow to it. The only cons are the lack of metaphors and multies, just improve in that department. All in all it was a good drop. Stay active

    One+
    we are what we are, what we never think we are.

  12. #12
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    I loved this piece. That was the shit I have no compliants keep doing what you do son!
    ~~~~~I GOT A BODY LIKE A COKE BOTTLE WATCH ME WALK~~~~~~
    TRINA 2002

  13. #13
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    lookin good... still uppin for some feed.
    A.T.
    DayumNation

  14. #14
    They say I'm a fight risk A.T.'s Avatar
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    ok ok,.... dont read my shit, lmao
    DayumNation

  15. #15
    Da_Renegade
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    I liked this man, good flow and a nice drop for real

    i liked that anti-suprresant line

    1

    peep ma open mic "Da Renegade"

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