I wasn't born born a woman (new ish)

[Chase]

I was not born a a girl

I was born a woman,

and that I will be untill I leave this earth

I'ved rasied children with out the pains of child birth

i've had men and boys, they've used me as a punching bag
as well as a toy

I no longer cry, In fact I never have

For that is what little girls do, and I have never had the privlage of being that

I have never played childish games

No hop scotch No jump rope, not for me nope
No hide go seek no playing house

Because there were no games in my house

Far to much to do in my house

You had to do for all before you did for you,and with out a second thought thats what I did

Untill I got sick

Sick of the cryen sick of the screaming sick of those damn kids

So I Ran

Yes I took kthe cowards way out

But it was the right thing to do I know that now

Cause when I left the demon followed me

And gave her the will to grow, to wake up, to see

And when she saw her life changed
She no longer had me around to punch and stomp

Kick that empty space on the ground

But then again a space can't make those blood curdeling sounds

The screams that held tears

cause a real woman never cries she only faces her fears

So here I am to face you but you trun your back

The woman you thought was girl is here for.............................


What ?

[HazY.B]

Because there were no games in my house

Far to much to do in my house

^ that threw off your rythm that you had going
the DOUBLE house repeat made it an offset

however the I RAN line was a simple statement to what this was to me
all these things going on in this poem
and teh simple wasy out was to run

Kick that empty space on the ground

But then again a space can't make those blood curdeling sounds^ that was your strong (back bone) to eh peice i felt it was the line with the most RELATIVITY to it....

decent peice chase*

[Chase]

thanks

[Chase]

Ummm Feed please

[Verbatim]

I thought this was aight...

Sometimes it didn't rhyme, but i think it was meant to be that way... The flow was off a little bit at times. The emotion was there, but there coulda been a little more. The vocab was alright.

NIce drop overall.....was a good read
peace

oh and don' forget to check out my latest piece it's called.... What is Anger?

[WeRd-smith]

I'ved rasied children with out the pains of child birth

this was deep and emotional this particular line made me think back to people i knew like this. i went through sort of the same thing but i am male and it wasn't the same burden. i love the simplicty of the words that belie the true complexity of the matter.

No hop scotch No jump rope, not for me nope
No hide go seek no playing house

Because there were no games in my house

Far to much to do in my house

i liked this, everyone else be damned grrrrr. just because you used house more than once means nothing. if you say it a little quicker than the original rhyme scheme.

like thisV

no hide go seek in my HOUSE, no games in my HOUSE, far much to do in my HOUSE

that is ill she's trying to emphasize the house and the anger she has for it. the way you wrote it kinda brought the emotion out in it. you can't write poetry, hell, even lyrics by a blueprint, you pulled this off fine.

[Chase]

thanks, this is some thing I just just wrote I finnaly faced how I felt when I ran away from home