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Thread: Escape

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Conceptual's Avatar
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    Escape

    living, dying
    striving, staying alive-ing
    don't nobody ask why we
    live up, to "don't give up"

    cities of steel
    impeccable cogwheels
    in the machine
    run by ego-defense mechanisms

    shit, out of luck
    one day
    not a single soul
    will give a single fuck

    going under
    drowning in an ocean of failures
    burdens of fabricated expectations
    rinsed away

    breathing again
    I feel, I function
    finally free
    embracing the downfall

  2. #2
    Cypher Alumni Sammy's Avatar
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    Re: Escape

    well, i wasn't a big fan of 'staying alive-ing' (although im sure it was done in jest) but the concept of this piece was very enjoyable.

    i feel this piece touched on a taboo of some sort. "don't give up" has been a mantra of society, not just american but every nation. To question it is very ballsy. love the city of steel segment. i took it as our intrinsic (or perhaps societal conditioning) urge to keep a straight face and just keep going.

    very next stanza seems to question the value/worth of it alll; will i or anyone give a fuck whether i succeed or not?

    it ended in a strange concoction of "who cares" kind of sentiment? lol. very weird but the body of work held that ideology in place. thanks for sharing.

    also, are you from LA? seen you mentioned it

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  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Conceptual's Avatar
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    Re: Escape

    Sup, @Sammy thanks for giving your thoughts on the poem. You're right, it's about modern grey mass social conditioning. Given it's arbitrary nature, it doesn't provide the worker class citizens much aspiration beyond fitting in. Do anybody care about the subservient people from 200 years ago? The ending is open-ended, embracing failure through soceity's standards and be free to do whatever, kill yourself, live in a cave or become a self realized entrepreneur. Just end pointlesss striving at any cost.

    Anyways, thanks again for commenting, and yeah it's your proverbial slacker from LA, Concrete. Give me a shout if you want some feed or wanna do a poetry collab!

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