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Thread: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! walkerblack's Avatar
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    a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    I walked down a corridor dimly lit by candle sticks.
    Its white, whispering walls wore slanted paintings;
    All oddly ordered, each suggesting stories.

    I sauntered for a while, experiencing all the art.
    My pace quickened with each painting;
    Till I was panting, racing in the dark.

    This went on for a bit till I no longer felt alarmed.
    Time escaped my mind, and I began to feel a part;
    A part of every painting, then I realized that I was.

    I stopped the mindless movement.
    I watched the works and waited.
    Contemplation construed a shadow self;
    And I fathomed that the paintings were what fate is.

    The oddly ordered paintings did suggest some stories.
    But rather, not in plural; they stored the story of my life.
    I saw its paths per my decisions, how I might choose and why.
    And very single section ended (under flowers),
    with worms around my spine.

    I realized this and sighed, opened my eyes and saw the light.
    I thanked God to be alive, then thanked the fungus to my right.
    greetings netizens

  2. #2
    Xtermnation Xtraordinaire Genocide's Avatar
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    Re: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    abstract style, dark content as i read it. this is my cup of tea. appreciate the feed. this seems more poetic in nature than a typical verse would. am i correct assuming that this is considered poetry to you and not your typical format and style? either way. i enjoyed it and its dope. thanks
    Adolf Spitler.

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    You've Earned a Custom Title! walkerblack's Avatar
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    Re: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    Quote Originally Posted by Genocide View Post
    am i correct assuming that this is considered poetry to you and not your typical format and style?
    You are correct. My verses are almost never laid out this way in terms of rhyme-scheme or actual structure

    Thanks for the looks
    greetings netizens

  4. #4
    Xtermnation Xtraordinaire Genocide's Avatar
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    Re: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    fuh sho, dope piece
    Adolf Spitler.

  5. #5
    Cypher Alumni Sammy's Avatar
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    Re: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    Hmmm...u familiar with hypnosis? This reminds me of the this induction method by James Braid. It was one of the earlier form of hypnotic induction pattern. Ur piece shares many similar imagery and language sleight. The obvious inference here is trance by substance lol. I feel in regards to inherit rhyme and technique, we look and see "it" very similarly which is refreshing as most prefer the more "pronounced" rhyming (multies for example). I think ur brand of rhyme mechanic is the kind to subtly developed, ultimately urging the reader to just "keep going, you'll catch it. trust me" not many can observe that type of scheme. I only know of two others that can pick up on it and theyre my buddies Self Activate and Alice. It's a subtle art but I think u definitely "see" based on ur analysis of my verse in Oz. On the real, this piece is very dope. Concise and loaded with poetic devices and subtle scheming. Keep in bro.

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  6. #6
    You've Earned a Custom Title! walkerblack's Avatar
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    Re: a meditative experience (a journey with closed eyes)

    Quote Originally Posted by Sammy View Post
    Hmmm...u familiar with hypnosis? This reminds me of the this induction method by James Braid. It was one of the earlier form of hypnotic induction pattern. Ur piece shares many similar imagery and language sleight. The obvious inference here is trance by substance lol. I feel in regards to inherit rhyme and technique, we look and see "it" very similarly which is refreshing as most prefer the more "pronounced" rhyming (multies for example). I think ur brand of rhyme mechanic is the kind to subtly developed, ultimately urging the reader to just "keep going, you'll catch it. trust me" not many can observe that type of scheme. I only know of two others that can pick up on it and theyre my buddies Self Activate and Alice. It's a subtle art but I think u definitely "see" based on ur analysis of my verse in Oz. On the real, this piece is very dope. Concise and loaded with poetic devices and subtle scheming. Keep in bro.
    Thank you sir I appreciate all that a ton. It's pretty fulfilling when someone can identify your idiosyncrasies. I'm sure you're right about that capability being credited to our stylistic similarities
    greetings netizens

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