rubber bands

[Jukon]

i snapped, and kissed the gravel,
each strand of my sanity
slowly began to unravel.
so tight knit it seemed,
but the anger comes so easily.
diving in, I plant my fist
into the wall
it's paper thin.

i crumple the letter,
that I sent proposing
we tie the loose ends
back together.

slingshots and these thoughts
propel me into
a theme park.
coasting through emotions,
I'm hoping
this is worth it.

[Soule]

Probably one of the more creative pieces I've read as it can be seen from different perspectives. It could be one huge metaphor for love and hoping it'll take you somewhere. It can be a metaphoric joy ride from the pov of an actual rubber band. Or it can be a metaphor for Leonardo DiCaprio at the oscars all these years. Either way. Wording was really well put together and I really liked these lines...

i snapped, and kissed the gravel,
each strand of my sanity
slowly began to unravel.

i crumple the letter,
that I sent proposing
we tie the loose ends
back together.

coasting through emotions,
I'm hoping
this is worth it.

Dope poem. Nom'd.

[Emily]

i snapped, and kissed the gravel,
each strand of my sanity
slowly began to unravel.

-------great wording and rhyme here jukon. I love the way you started this with ...'I snapped...' That gives off imagery thats strong. It gives off lots of pictures that could potentially go down. I also liked the rhyme. I loved how you followed up 'I snapped...' with '...and kissed the gravel...' Probably my favourite line of the week. Without a doubt. I don't know what it does to me. Humble me? I don't know. I just find it totally beautiful.

so tight knit it seemed,
but the anger comes so easily.
diving in, I plant my fist
into the wall
it's paper thin.

^^^ 'it's paper thin.' I can sense the velocity just with those three little words there. And how you've lost your patience. And how you've reached a boiling point. In a few short lines, you've given me a whole stack of food for thought.

i crumple the letter,
that I sent proposing
we tie the loose ends
back together.

slingshots and these thoughts
propel me into
a theme park.

The slingshots line is cool, it backs up the power you seem to have in you, your conviction, and your outlook on the whole circus of a mess that's made. I mean, I could be wrong, but...that's what I've got.

coasting through emotions,
I'm hoping
this is worth it.

'coasting through emotions? nice. very nice. I also like your last two lines. I like that you leave us with questions.
I like that you're still hoping. I like it all. You're a wonderful poet Jukon. You have a real talent for connecting with the ordinary person. You bring out emotions in you pieces that I really don't care to visit, but you take me there and I always feel less lonely, because of your words.

Beautiful Read.

Thank you.

[Jukon]

Bump

[TheIllyricist]

i snapped, and kissed the gravel,
each strand of my sanity
slowly began to unravel.
so tight knit it seemed,
but the anger comes so easily.
diving in, I plant my fist
into the wall
it's paper thin.

If there's something I can say about your writing Jukon, is that every time it feels honest. I like that. I like when I get that feeling, that link between writer and reader. We're connected by the kindred emotions we feel in this rollercoaster of life. This opener was beautiful. Snap goes the rubber band and smacks with the rubber-smacked kiss of the ground. You've hit the breaking point and you fall... Everything's so much and it unwinds and unwinds and unwinds. The threads of the elastic pull and tug, get weaker until they break or come near to breaking. Just like the rubber band, or better yet you are the rubber band. Letting go and slinging your fist into the wall. I feel this. I really do.

i crumple the letter,
that I sent proposing
we tie the loose ends
back together.

Bridging paper thin walls to the crumpling of a letter was smooth, silky smooth Juk. I suppose there's many ways to take this. An attempt to get a relationship back together, or simply to find the closure we all seek. Repairing a friendship? Metaphorically we could be sticking with the snapped band, and trying to put the broken pieces back together. With tape, with glue? But I suppose you, me, we... we all crumple that letter because the broken strands don't quite fit together anymore.

slingshots and these thoughts
propel me into
a theme park.
coasting through emotions,
I'm hoping
this is worth it.

Slingshots shoot the rubber band... These thoughts spring you into the theme park of life (I love the mirroring here. The metaphor was short and cleanly executed), where love and loss and grief and regret. The ugly and the beautiful all meld together. And here, we explore the darker emotions. The one's that keep us up late staring up at the ceiling. The one's that fester and tear the fragile band-aids off of fresh wounds. We're all just along for the ride, hoping it's all worth it. You ride this ride. We all ride it together.

Exploring emotions like that are important, and I feel what you write is very important Juke. Lets us seethe, lets us breathe, lets us heal. Thank you for writing this, and sharing it. I loved this, a lot.