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Thread: Passage

  1. #1
    The guy below me is gay. Easy.'s Avatar
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    Passage




    Passage has begun—
    The leaves' colors celebrated
    A fiery, burning passion
    A picture has been painted
    Oh, it seems like magic
    Has came and had its ways with
    Every color imagined
    Mother nature gets a facelift
    —But why must we let it happen?
    We stand in awe, amazement
    When all we're really seeing:
    Is death by deprivation

    We celebrate another year
    And granted, that is fine
    Because soon? Summers here!
    But while its cold we whine
    We have never thought or feared
    What we have left behind
    We have never shed a tear
    For what we allowed to die

    Maybe I was forgotten
    Getting closer to my death
    Hanging on to the bark then
    I breath my final breath
    Surely I had fallen
    A place where I would be kept
    Instead of turning rotten
    Maybe I would be swept
    But I can only lay here
    Not knowing what is next

    Passage has begun—
    Posterity is celebrated
    Pictures remembered me
    But your memories have faded
    You look at the scenic view
    You have viewed it, painless
    What do you think has happened to
    Your previous creations?

    I was the victim of poor placement
    So I can only float around
    Dead, with the wind—
    Aimless.

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  2. #2
    Landed Emily's Avatar
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    Re: Passage

    Easy, it's one link per drop (for this month).
    Chuck a link in here so we're all good : )


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  3. #3
    ::..VOCABULUS..:: 143's Avatar
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    Re: Passage

    Ease...

    I like how you play the seasons to the progressions of life. This matriculation of events and temperatures that shape the conditions till the passing of the character. The subtle influences of nature really defines the imagery and connects to the topic of the poem. I like that you pulled out the less common aspects of nature rather than being so blatant with the representation. This poem was good in many ways and it's one that I had to read multiple times. Good Shit....


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    Best Topical Writer: 143

  4. #4
    The guy below me is gay. Easy.'s Avatar
    Join Date
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    Re: Passage

    http://www.rapbattles.com/showthread...=1#post8771229

    Sorry, @Emily . Would have been sooner if I'd have known.

  5. #5

    Re: Passage

    Maybe I was forgotten
    Getting closer to my death


    I loved this line. I lke the smooth diction which lead to a pretty
    Cool progression of the story. Simple rhythm good imagery through out
    Felt like you wrote just wnough in each stanza mothing was missing is what
    I mean. Really wnjoyed the way you told the story and used certain subtle
    Hints to keep it going. Def enjoyed the read. ThNk you
    DamNation

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