Here is I

[Spoken]

The skies shift with each tube,
The panic room quiet; ethical ambiance.
Lucid woes grovel at the thesis
We heed beyond warning of our faults
-in the stars
Waning introverted depictions
Deep beyond our thoughts; mind bending
We serve our hunger for insight
Thirsty for knowledge that's a fallacy.
Endeavors tied to succinct past transgression
Heavily scripted yet denied its place.
Its here that we begin to...
... build such a facade; our metronome
Our best to a solstice creed wading.
-at the daggers tip!
Crossroads with pebbles.
Mere shards scattered acrossm
this plateau of verbal cadence;
Treading the essence of being within its circle.

We were man before;
Words became reality...
.. a matrix of dreams.

Hardening our souls
This web engulfs- the richness
Behind guarded cages that beats;
Fluidity in our veins thriving!
We were..
Targets yet marksmen
Victims but still in control of these...
...wretched bygones eating.
-from the inside out.
A monster; nothing less with no...
...beautiful rivets. Just scars.
My closet of secrets deems me-
An imperfection in denial of the deeds.
The greed in me for wanting...
... saving myself and leaving other;
Prey.
To be slain of the norm while I keep
Etching thru infinite crevices.
To emerge beyond the root of evil.

As long as my hands were clean
-i was free of my past.

Waiting to be seen,
With psoriasis pigment;
Each scab reveals- ME!

[graf-x]

great read here man. like the wording and deep thought you put into this
nothing overly complicated or seemed out of place - every word seemed to carry its meaning properly
overall the message was clear --- imagery was on point

i enjoyed this read. like i said great job..

you had a lot of quotable lines here but my favorites were

The panic room quiet; ethical ambiance.
Lucid woes grovel at the thesis
We heed beyond warning of our faults
-in the stars
&
Its here that we begin to...
... build such a facade; our metronome
Our best to a solstice creed wading.
-at the daggers tip!
Crossroads with pebbles.
Mere shards scattered acrossm
this plateau of verbal cadence;
Treading the essence of being within its circle.

[Emily]

I agree with mic s here, solid imagery Storyteller.
I think for me the stand out element was the use of wording and the way it didn't go over the top, but was still so real and interesting for the reader to digest. Your wording built nice atmosphere and with the images that were so vivid, epic, it all took on a pop-up book reality.
Some parts were exceptional imo, ie...

The panic room quiet; ethical ambiance.
Lucid woes grovel at the thesis

We were man before;
Words became reality...
.. a matrix of dreams.

...Hardening our souls
This web engulfs- the richness
Behind guarded cages that beats;
Fluidity in our veins thriving!
We were..
Targets...

... saving myself and leaving other;
Prey.
To be slain of the norm while I keep
Etching thru infinite crevices.
To emerge beyond the root of evil...

As long as my hands were clean
-i was free of my past.

^^^^^ I especially love this bit.

Waiting to be seen,
With psoriasis pigment;
Each scab reveals- ME!

Great outro Storyteller! I like the psoriasis/pigment/scab imagery, and then telling us that it equates to you, is superb.

This has a solid feel to it. It's jam packed with pictures and clean wording that cuts me up when I read it.
There's some really nice phrases, I didn't quote all I like.

Job well done Storyteller.
You're such a talented writer.
Your words come alive and live in front of my eyes.
They breathe.


Great Read.