Let it rain

[Conceptual]

let it rain
let it simply pour down
listen to the pure sounds

I walk detached on the misty streets left in tranquil emptiness
oh revengeful mistress of death, why have you tempted me?
thoughts collides, hazy lines forms undefined
the happy and unpleasant humans are all inside

I am consumed by solemn thoughts of no tomorrows
seeing impending doom like Sodoma and Gomorrah
still - the dark clouds harmonize with my aura



my senses wrenched together as I entered the venture
although I wasn't even invited, I still went there..
the hostile institution from my past - still an ominous sight
driven to the edge of what's wrong and right
left standing lonesome on the opposite side


draped in a dark coat I discreetly observed the grey building
in dismay of disarrayed feelings, they prayed for the children..
..numbered in a black book of sin
once again,
I was on the outside looking in..


at the same organized and petty pretense; princesses and
primadonnas besieged with cliques of champions and tyrants
I imagined peace in my mind's eye pursuing the ambient silence..
from unchanging faces that haunted me to that very day
to settle an emotional debt I concluded "they will pay"


we're all young from the start, my springtime was sprung apart
seeing them still live prosperous and effortlessly stung my heart
they were not supposed to get the last laugh
anguish and bitterness surpassed the wrath
flashbacks of passages summoned to me what the good bishop reiterated
I questioned God why I was sent to Earth only to have my spirit obliterated..


the humiliations took an unwieldy toll on my sanity
insight, I was the butt of a rather vulgar joke - humanity
misleading faith only made it more unbearable
righteousness did not prevail like in those parables
a somewhat righteous justification is what I was seeking
sounds of a cheery gathering amplified while I was weeping..


how pitiful
I had to stop this ridicule
no more tears, enough confusion
resolution claims retribution



the apprehension was a combination of horror and elation
as I walked down the familiar corridors of degradation..
I felt remarkably calm and collected - cooler than ice
this time around I had friends with me - Ruger and Knife
as I entered the party I was greeted by recognizable, disgusted looks
abrubtly as I stood, I realized my yearning to let justice shook..


"you are all witnesses to my concluding testimony"
an awkward stillness saturated the ceremony..
ah, serenity..
hearing the ringing from my dreams..
I lingered with ease..
feeling a profound relief..
as my index finger squeezed..









I pretend I don't hear the tasteless party music and dire growls
using my invisibility as protection - it's all quiet now

I can stay right here, where it's safe to make amends
let it rain, let it rain, dear God, please don't ever let it end

[Sammy]

Hey thanks again on the feed son. Well I'm not much of a poet but I know what I enjoy and I enjoyed this. Very interesting. I feel the poem was questioning the universe''s sense of justice. The like the twist at the end also. Good stuff son.

[Jukon]

I can fuck with this. Style is something I don't see very often, a lot of broken thoughts and lines that seem to have no relation but somehow it all ties together. There was a lot of good in this, but my favorite stanza

the humiliations took an unwieldy toll on my sanity
insight, I was the butt of a rather vulgar joke - humanity
misleading faith only made it more unbearable
righteousness did not prevail like in those parables
a somewhat righteous justification is what I was seeking
sounds of a cheery gathering amplified while I was weeping..

Seems the most simplistic stanza but I think it said the most,'it was the most true, not hiding behind an overly extensive vocabulary or metaphors, just true. Good post, I liked it

[Conceptual]

Thanks for the food guys.

[Emily]

This is great. I really like it. The beauty of this section is the spectrum of amazing poetry that comes this way, in styles that aren't always the norm. I like that you've been able to keep this format here, it really works with the piece imo. I think the structure was good. I also think your vocab and tone was well done.
This has imagery galore. It's jam packed with it. It's has so much detail for the reader to digest, and emotion backing it up, that it's almost movie like. At first I thought it was a party he was going to crash. Then I thought it was a wedding. Now I think it's a school.
You embody the mindset of a mass murderer. You painted the pictures so well, even the long coat brings images of those we've seen on the news. I got the black book being a bible, and I just saw so much in your words.
You're a very talented story teller.
I haven't read anything by you before so it was a pleasure reading this.
I would quote some words but to be honest, I like every stanza.

Beautiful work.

Thank you for this.

I pretend I don't hear the tasteless party music and dire growls
using my invisibility as protection - it's all quiet now

I can stay right here, where it's safe to make amends
let it rain, let it rain, dear God, please don't ever let it end

I couldn't help myself. ^^^ stunning.

[Conceptual]

Thanks for your sweet elaborate feedback Emily. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it. The original title was actually "High School Reunion" so your intepretation was straight legit. Gonna return the favor soon.

[Conceptual]

...

[Cody Phoenix]

@Conceptual was your alias Concrete?

[Conceptual]

@Conceptual was your alias Concrete?

Yeah, that's right.