The first one

[Cody Phoenix]

Had a heart half full
'till the day she broke it
it's changed now,
still see her ghost when I focus,
those bad times
split this head in two,
still got a rope on my throat
to remember you,
its hard to swallow,
in the depths we drew,
sex, blues, everything we meant to do,
see, I realized we're best in two,
you and I's like a suicide letter,
do or die together
you and I for better?
nah
why ride the weather?
when I can just say
bye forever
'live your life', whatever.

- - - Updated - - -

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?486587-Multiverse

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?481918-A-release-of-tension

[Nohbody]

giving other sites a test run eh Cody?

This was a cool short little piece here man. I like that it embodies emotion, but as a true typical human reaction we give it the old "whatever" so not to make it seem like the situation isnt eating at us haha. . good wording and said a lot for such a short piece

hope all is well with you and your family. . . whatever you do, keep writing. even if its not online

[Cody Phoenix]

giving other sites a test run eh Cody?

This was a cool short little piece here man. I like that it embodies emotion, but as a true typical human reaction we give it the old "whatever" so not to make it seem like the situation isnt eating at us haha. . good wording and said a lot for such a short piece

hope all is well with you and your family. . . whatever you do, keep writing. even if its not online

Thanks man, for the feedback. I'm dropping these little bits to keep off the rust... I still got my skills sharpened...but forums don't really seem the place to showcase them anymore..haha

In a nutshell.... I'm still around, I'm growing old of forums and all the drama embedded on them. I'm not too fond of constantly being pushed to do something I don't have time for anyways, like RR always wanted me to do shit and they ended up disrespecting me 'cause I didn't give two shits about them or their disrespect. They're full of bad staff and immature moderation, I ran their text drops and reformed it into a pristine machine in my short time I put into it and made PoA (the greatest crew that site ever seen), I had my fair share of that 'forum life' rofl... bigger and better pastures await someone like me.

[cz]

I like this, simple, love, rhymes very well, very good would like to read more from you.

[Baron Mynd]

I thought this started off well, shorter style than I'm perhaps used to reading but I've adopted this one myself on occasion.

The opening line, or two lines, was the standout of the piece for me. The rest read almost like you were just flexing quickly on the keys and letting the letters fall where they would.

I thought the 'you and I's/u and i's' like a suicide letter stood out too though I'm not entirely sure why that got my attention, or if it was even intentional on your part but I'm leaning towards giving you the benefit of the doubt there haha!

All in all an enjoyable read. Good to see a familiar face still at it.

Keep that pen moving!

[thatdudeB]

Thought this was a nice short rhyme. Only thing i could say is wish it was longer. Nothing super complex or whatever. Just a good read.