brutal multiz

[Devils_Diamond]

How Come Thinkin' of Hard Descion's is like Quantum Physic's
Cause Afflictions are Apart of Livin, sum don't get far from tha Start.. they Finsished
Who would Know, reality is Illusional, .. as Death Pursues our Human Soul
a Gruesome Toll, to Choose a Road that will eventually lead to a Tomb of Stone
Disconnect ya Head from ya Reciever, make tha Next Step u take Attempt ta Take a Breather, Break your Femur, Revenge is Sweet but Avenge is Sweeter, Select ya Leisure, Attention Seeker, or Intentional Cheater?
I'm tha Incredible Creature, with tha Special Feature as if im a Rentinal Reader, Essential Research, for ya Parrental Teacher, Successful Achiever
is my Rep When i Step Onto tha Scene...First one i See Either Eat's Dirt..
or get's Buried Beneath 6 Feet Deeper then tha Normal Procedure

- - - Updated - - -

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?484649-Evolution
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?484856-vent

[cz]

Nice rhymes.

[dkoy88]

In the beginning the multis were going for you then it got choppy. Try to maintain your syllable count but also tryto develop a story line or just an overall idea. Just seems like a ramble without anything relevant. Some near hits and I can see you have talent just keep writing. Hopefully I see more from you.

[_Lyrics]

What up devil diamondz!.
This was a cool little read and you know what i gotta give you some props on yohr multi usage as your wording was not bad at all either and usually the rhymes get sacrificed for content or context takes a hit for better multis. Rhymes should never be forced, and the beginning was a great example of using multis in a fluid way. As far as the aftual content is was a decent little flex piece i was feeling the beginning more though. Thought you opened up very strong

[Devils_Diamond]

Thanks guys I appreciate it

[Usurp]

yeah i feel kinda like lyrics .. i did enjoy the way the multies sounded in your verse
but at the same time u did sacrifice your content and creativity for multies use
alot of these were just placed there because they rhyme, they are missing alot of elements

Disconnect ya Head from ya Reciever, make tha Next Step u take Attempt ta Take a Breather, Break your Femur, Revenge is Sweet but Avenge is Sweeter, Select ya Leisure, Attention Seeker, or Intentional Cheater?

i mean what exactly does this translate to?

I'm tha Incredible Creature, with tha Special Feature as if im a Rentinal Reader, Essential Research, for ya Parrental Teacher, Successful Achiever

u lost the syllable count here , but the content got alot better and more logical

and then the final bar has no little to no multi use

over all shits still a cool keystyle props on this and keep working at it