Open Topic
16 lines limit
Due in 24hrs. After the first person has checked in
good luck.
Open Topic
16 lines limit
Due in 24hrs. After the first person has checked in
good luck.
ATTENTION @Mr.Write,
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Check Check ...
He slept in peace but within reach of the coldest emotions,
It ran deep and within weeks he was lost and corroded.
Never too spoken but his thoughts would always run in a daze,
Deep in a coffin he laid, a stain of what can obviously change.
Mahogany reigns a foot race to a probable case,
Piercing rage that fled the scene once the flames went away.
Night skies would relayed safety parted these days
So he gathered all emotions he solely wanted obtained.
Slit wrists for the crave, living in shadows for long
Message to who oppose of what most want to be gone.
Hardly a song it's a medley that plays till the wrong
finally see the strong burn and explode like zeros on bombs.
A consensual prog that dilates the rhapsody sung,
Till his eyes bled dry and dormant i.e. left to be hung.
Most are strung and the belief of life after strums fire
To burn the stern thought that amongst us are vampires.
"Every magic trick consists of three parts, or acts. The first part is called the pledge. The magician shows you something ordinary.
The second act is called the turn. The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it into something extraordinary. But you wouldn't clap yet, because making something disappear isn't enough. You have to bring it back. Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled." — Cutter.
Last edited by Spoken; November 18th, 2014 at 08:13 PM
ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE
https://usjapancouncilstories.files....1/04/odaka.jpg
"The Power Of Man"
..Once A City That Flourished, A Bustling District Where People Awoke Cheerful In The Morning..
..Where All Poverty Was Harnessed, The Streets Filled With Tourists, How Could This So Quickly Be Tarnished..
..No Symptoms Of Carnage, Just A Life Filled Market, Full Of Farmers & Vendors Selling Their Garments..
..Artists Constantly Drawing, Beautiful Structures Lined With Garnish, & Bright Lights Illuminated Darkness..
.....That Dreadful Morning.....
..A Normal Routine Started, As People Awoke Saying Prayers To Show Respect To Their Dearly Departed..
..This City Has Overcome Struggle, But Nothing Could Prepare Them For This Day, The Hardest..
..A Fleet Of Vehicles Lined The Streets, As Militants Began To Shout At All The Men Women & Children..
..If They Ran They Killed Them, & They Were Overcome With Fear As Soldiers Began Looting Their Buildings..
..Tears Began To Fall As They Executed Civilians, Even The Nicest People Were Now Viewed As Villains..
..For Pain & Agony Slowly Began To Fill Them, & Their Only Expression Was A Show Of Bewilderment..
..The Soldiers Plans Worked Perfect, Not One Left Behind Person , Mirushima Slowly Became Deserted..
..Their Leaders Were Never Nervous, & This Was Only A Drill? But They Demolished A City On Purpose..
..Now Do Me One Favor, Ask Yourself Was It Worth It?..
Harmcity™
U know I've voted.... more proof I've even voted in the 1-2
Anyways @L.E @DEV aka Endeva @Professor Frost @Nigma @ILLunatic @Jukon @143 let's go writers votw
ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE
I'll vote rite after school
right, here goes... first off im gonna say who my vote is going to, then i'll tell you why
so... my vote is: Mr Write
Write, some might say yours was a done concept, but it makes to difference to me as long as the content isn't... I thought it was well written, solid mechanics, maybe lacking a few multis here and there, but that's probs just cos I like to pack as many in as possible, plus the topic was right down my street, I was looking for something that popped right out at me though, which I didn't get
Harmcity, to be honest I didn't recognize your name so wasn't really expecting much, and at a glance I was like, wtf's with his structure, and at the beginning I thought I was right but as it progressed, I got in to it more, once i'd got ur structure, nice take on the concept, you really built it up nicely, so yea... some nice writing there, just a shame you used such an odd layout, stick to lines and bars, don't disadvantage yourself
overall... for me this was a close one to call, a decent quality of writing from both, so I took it down to which one suited my eye, and style...
...good battle
[youtube]99ns8n2S40g[/youtube]
Battles been open almost a week and only 1 vote?
Word up people....
ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE
Good battle here, seems like you both are neck & neck.
The Rhythm is in Harm's favor, he had way more internals which made it flow constantly.
He had a more cohesive & coherent story. His emotional connection was also better.
On the other hand, Vocabulary/Rhymes & Signifying goes to Write.
He had advanced wording & metaphors.
I ended up giving this to Harm City, for more of a versatile verse. 3:2 was my score.
Vote: Harmcity
@Lenox School Has Been A Few Days Huh LoL
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