Ballerina Girl
I never had a regret in my life, and if I did it's too late for repentance
Gripping this pen so tight I know the only end is already my sentence
If I fall it will be from another’s vengeance / My life, smothered in remembrance//
Crucifixation is my only real penance//
Of my flaws, I’m looking for answers you can’t locate with search engines
Was it lack of temperence? Or living eye for an eye with a vengeance?
The witnesses in reference said here in attendance / And it’s been rocky ever since //
As my heart beats like a reminder of what I must finish//
Maybe it was the look in her eyes, maybe it was the bruises she tried to describe
Or the secrets of nightfall she’d keep as she sleep that’d she tried so hard to hide
Maybe how she treated me kind / but know she was always on my mind//
Loneliness and love for the seed I knew was rightfully mine //
What does it matter? It would be the last time... a reminder to rewind her
Refusal, an explanation as twisted the lime light with a finder to refine her
But, before he came along we were strong / stronger than the mile was long //
Now all I have left are these words from an old man’s sad song //
[Interlude]
Her soft kiss even softer cause they’re from her soft lips
To dismiss those hips, the ones that I’d miss, had me nestled deep in her abyss
I had to be wrong because eventually you were his / but still I’d dismiss //
The punishment? Her eyez and the hope within them that I’d always miss //
Your honor was my crime of passion! As I solemnly march to my back lashing
I swore my acts were justified and random, and them --- just bashing
Besides you weren’t to know what happenned / Or that no one argued if I had to stab him //
Buried with all my memories of back then //
It’s whether or not I should have, would have, cause in truth, I could not
Seems as if everything I had learned, I conveniently forgot
His brother 3 cells away from my cot / I ignore because for some reason I been reading a lot //
Maybe it is and maybe it is not, but I refuse to submit, it’s my last shot //
I’m sorry but I can’t regret that I gave my own life for you to live yours right
In retrospect, we're even, even if just returning what you gave me that night
If this never reaches her ears / I just want her to know my sacrifice...wait ... //
Officers patrolling near, they’re only vice, but in my hate I don’t want them seeing me here //
I don’t want them knowing "I love you" for it was my only hope
The only justifiable reason I cope, my only sobaxon (sp?) for that dope
The only loose rope on the noose around my throat / sealed with a deuce who’s emotions I emote //
Taps... my time reached its limit, taketh the life I gave and then live it //
I lived a shifty life with you as the only happiness, if this is how it has to end...
good bye ... but no longer the rules are yours to bend
The lights dims, only 2 cells unlocked I can hear them / never baby girl ever shall you fear them //
Someone is coming, I am ready to be judged for my sins, as I hear you whisper it’s ok, it never really begins //
I love you......