Savior Of Text

[Venom]

Links:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...74963-my-story

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...OL-IN-THE-RAIN

When your on top of the temple looking down at pin holes
it's simple to show off them dimples and ride fames tempo
all without so much as one pen stroke that's shown to them folks
that get to critique every peak and low they can see in flow
Then you get to receive your dough, it's unbelievable
Emcees like me who are writing to a degree you don't
get robbed of feed and votes, let's invoke greed and breed a hoaxe
Feed a fleet of trolls to greet newbies with a lethal dose
of insults that pry apart the site like a needle nose
It's indisputable, yet as usual its hurting and
Diverting eyes from the musical gist that this site fits
This should incite fists to slam down to fight this unrighteous
virus that is spreading around cyber space and heisting
the iris of text, if it's not tonight is it the next
that the love of my life takes the plunge to its death?
We've got to come on a United front to save what's left...

[KnowP]

Emcees like me who are writing to a degree you don't
get robbed of feed and votes, let's invoke greed and breed a hoaxe
Feed a fleet of trolls to greet newbies with a lethal dose
of insults that pry apart the site like a needle nose

SHIT!!! This hit home bro. been there! Good multi's too!

This should incite fists to slam down to fight this unrighteous
virus that is spreading around cyber space and heisting
the iris of text, if it's not tonight is it the next
that the love of my life takes the plunge to its death?
We've got to come on a United front to save what's left...

MAN!! Good metaphor usage.



My brutha, this was extremely fruitful to the point that i remember thinking this very same thought back when i first started so i know where you are coming from in this piece. The flow was a bit shaky at parts even in the lines i quoted but the message was gripping and true in most sections of this site. Very profound drop. i appreciate this heart felt piece. Especially the needle nose/ fleets of trolls part. I just got through sifting through some OM's with that same issue like damn, people dont wana read this garbage. Dope drop man. Keep em coming.

[Emily]

Wow. That was great!
Outstanding. I loved it.

Two first bars grabbed me, and I was caught up in the imagery those lines had to offer.
And then it just got better.

Then the third line guts ya....... ‘all without so much as one pen stroke that's shown to them folks’.
-----------I feel like I just got kicked in the kidneys.---------------------

And the forth line’s sensitive....... ‘that get to critique every peak and low they can see in flow’

And then the fifth line........ ‘Then you get to receive your dough, it’s unbelievable’.
It’s unbelievable how good, ‘unbelievable’ sounds in that sentence.
You’ve got the ‘our’ sound in ‘your’, then ‘dough’, then unbelievable’. I like it.

‘Emcees like me who are writing to a degree you don't’ ----------
‘get robbed of feed and votes, let's invoke greed and breed a hoaxe’ -------- Listen to those ‘o’ and ‘e’ sounds ‘coming at you full bore.’ ---- Awesome.

“Feed a fleet of trolls to greet newbies with a lethal dose ----- lol, yep.
of insults that pry apart the site like a needle nose
It's indisputable, yet as usual its hurting and

Diverting eyes from the musical gist that this site fits ------- Oh yeahhh….ain’t that the truth.
This should incite fists to slam down to fight this unrighteous
virus that is spreading around cyber space and heisting

the iris of text, if it's not tonight is it the next ------- tad close for comfort.

that the love of my life takes the plunge to its death? ------- stunning bar here.

We've got to come on a United front to save what's left”... -----I hope so. This is great.

This piece inspires me, great theme.
A drop of poison flows to the heart and really made me think about what it was you were saying.
The feeling lingered longer than it should have, great stuff.
It’s upfront with the msg it delivers, doesn’t muck around.

I like the structure of it, I like the flow, but what I love the most, apart from the theme,
is the acoustics. Those sounds are strong, and have considered my audio sensibilities lol.

I love it when I hear music in words. So talented.
Great writing.
Great read.

[Emily]

@KnowP

? lol

[makengknowcentz]

wow a buffet of multis... you abused your pen here homie no doubt. alot of line sthat stand on their own that ill

[KnowP]

@KnowP

? lol

Got it. Thx for alerting me.

[Venom]

Appreciate the in depth feed all.
I will look over the o.m. tonight and return the feed

Good looks though @KnowP
@Emilyinthepool