Freestyle

[<SamPle>]

"I will and I can now let me tell you why I am so evil to a woman
Cause ever since I stuck my dick in this bitch of a game you see
All it gave me was aids and now nobody wants to fuck with me"

wasnt random, but was allw written to get to the punch on the last line

[Edison Av]

this drop wwas meh. ALTHOUGH, i choose to give you the benefit of the doubt, and assume that you're at least fairly new to this sorta thing, and if that's the case, you definitely have potential. you have the idea of setting up punchlines and mixing in well-known concepts to tie in with them, but the content and execution is lacking.

but basically, i can't diss you for throwing out the only references you could come up with even if they were a bit cliche', like the elijah wood line, peter pan line, etc..but like i said you HAVE THE CONCEPT which is more than alot of people can say for themselves.

one thing you need to work on bigtime is STRUCTURE. write to a beat and try to keep your words lined up with the breaks, because if you can't write accapella with some sense of pattern and flow you'll defininitely need to write with a beat on..at least until you get more comfortable with your flow.

like i said man, you have potential, and you should definitely keep doing your thing! stay up

[<SamPle>]

thanks for feed guys