30 days of Kon

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Thread: 30 days of Kon

  1. #1
    Get Touched abiona's Avatar
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    30 days of Kon



    Don't forget to number your posts... and have fun!

  2. #2
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    I.

    It all started with one last wish.

    You wanted me to be successful
    and I wanted you to leave.

    I've completely lost count
    of all the times
    my smile faded.

    I guess I lost the motivation
    somewhere along the way
    to finding out who I really was.

    Now I say this
    with fear and with
    hope that you will somehow
    come back.

    But the tombstone
    sporting your name
    is crushing those hopes
    and burying them with you.

    [I apologize]

    For my childish antics
    I know you resent me still
    but as a Father,
    I hope you forgave me
    when you took that last breath.

    And I suppose if you didn't
    I hope those
    emotions have been released
    and that you no longer
    have to carry the weight
    of my failures.

    Rest in Peace, Dad.

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    the theory of cause and effect is flawed,
    we expect the outcome to mirror the struggle, that's wrong.

  3. #3
    Azriel unadored's Avatar
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    I've completely lost count
    of all the times
    my smile faded.


    ^I'm right there with you.

    Respect for this Kon, it's obvious from the writing that the concept of this piece is personal to you, so respect from letting emotions flow the way you did.
    I pin-pointed the writing above^ as it stands out from the piece and hit's like a force 9 when you take it in. Same as I said for Abi, that last stanza was deep and tied the deep emotions together, fantastic.

    Peace Kon.



    never thought you'd miss the blueprints in my eyes.


    s c y t s o p h r e n i a

  4. #4
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    II. Eye Realize.

    Eyes notice the simplest things,
    and I notice
    how you try to hide
    your eyes from mine.
    You act as if
    eye can't see your ilashes
    hiding the truth.

    I apologize in advance
    for the way my eyes deceive.
    but they just want to see
    inside of you,
    and what makes you tick.

    The mirror ball inside
    just reflects
    all the nights you were

    alone.

    And if nothing else, I
    just want you to know
    that you're

    never alone; with me.



    #subliminal.

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    the theory of cause and effect is flawed,
    we expect the outcome to mirror the struggle, that's wrong.

  5. #5
    Get Touched abiona's Avatar
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    I use the eyes theme often in my pieces. Working on one right now. lol. But yeah, I think I probably write about eyes more than faces because they convey so much.

    Liked the first few lines - very simple yet they just sounded nice. If you wanted to extend this piece I'd expand a bit on that second stanza... how is it they deceive? Felt there is more to the story than what we see in the lines.


    As for your first piece...

    So personal. So honest. Hopefully writing it helped bring some catharsis. Thank you for sharing it with us.
    ArtificialIntelligence


    TNL
    ps... abi punchlines are played


  6. #6
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    III.

    Cigarettes

    Surrounded by you
    my teeth chatter and scream out
    I just need your warmth.

  7. #7
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    IV.

    I'm sorry that you're
    stuck counting on me.
    Cause I'm kind of a flake
    and I disappear 
    when you need me most.

    I've never been good with math,
    I don't know how to
    decipher the problems
    that we run from 
    once they rise.

    I've done it to her, to you
    heard both stories many times.
    And even though
    this doesn't add up.
    We will solve this.



    So sleep deprived.

  8. #8
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    V.

    I don't know where to begin.

    Maybe this is the end.
    It was never meant to be
    you were never
    the one for me.

    Maybe it never started at all.

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    the theory of cause and effect is flawed,
    we expect the outcome to mirror the struggle, that's wrong.

  9. #9
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    Fuck you double post.
    Last edited by Jukon; April 7th, 2011 at 06:29 PM

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    the theory of cause and effect is flawed,
    we expect the outcome to mirror the struggle, that's wrong.

  10. #10
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    VI.

    You're just one more
    forgotten memory to hang
    from a string on my wall.
    the noose that carries you,
    bounces and loses
    all consciousness.

    The ceiling fan, turns
    and provides air
    when you cut off my oxygen.
    everytime you
    look back at me with
    those; dead eyes.

  11. #11
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    VII.

    Seven--
    days of each week
    ways to seem weak.
    mistakes that I can't forget.

    Six--
    Apologies you won't accept.
    melodies you constantly repeat.
    glasses of wine that helps you drown.

    Five--
    senses that make me human.
    emotions I can't hate.
    songs that stay in my head.

    Four--
    pictures that stain my walls.
    hours that I can't get back
    months I wanted to relapse.

    Three-
    lies I practiced and memorized.
    words I said over and over again..
    tears I shed when you left.

    Two--
    People in the ground this year.
    bouquets that no one caught.
    lives I never witnessed.

    One--
    goodbye remains on my lips
    hug that I'll never get back
    love, you'll always be that.


  12. #12
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    VIII.

    Moving on
    takes time
    but my clock is frozen.
    on the seconds
    that we
    kissed, and fucked.

    questions that rise,
    are you ready, is it time?
    baby, as long our hearts
    beat together, in a melody
    with perfect rhythm.
    it'll always be
    the right time.

  13. #13
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    IX.

    I'll never be
    caught up.
    but...
    this is a start.

    it'll never be over
    it'll never change
    it'll never faulter
    but
    there's no way around pain.

    the truth is
    I'm broken inside.
    and as it makes
    it's way to the outside
    my mask will fall.

    this is no masquerade ball,
    no harlequin women,
    no golden shoes
    to take you home.

    just me, in a car
    with you by my side.
    taking the roads less
    traveled.

    and when the road
    curves, remember
    to hold on tight.
    wear your seatbelt
    and just face the light.



    finally caught up

  14. #14
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    X.

    Footprints in the dark,
    dust finally settles; but
    i will never see.


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  15. #15
    SirVent
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    Re: 30 days of Kon

    XI.



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