Cant give up.

[HellDriven]

Okay.. Give me a break for I did this quickly. Feed back would be appreciated.

They criticize me like they know what I'm going through
The words I type. Completely utterly true
this self hatred flowing through my body like a knife piercing flesh
Split open to new possibilities, I'm a new breed of rapper.. Straight up fresh
You can check and see the reflect of the truth within my lyrics,
Spitting what's on my mind, begging for help within the hints, see past the words and view the pints
See the pain held within till the day i unleash, I'm going to sin coz thats the way it has to begin
I know no other way so any attempt to display a different play is not okay,
I dont care how you criticize because till the day i die, I'm gonna be on top.
Never will I say im so fly, but my point is.. Eternally I'm going to be up high
You can never bring me down to the point of self ending
So keep on trying to end this soldier, For the only way i'm going down is a lead boulder
It's time to elevate to new heights, Drop the weight of the misunderstood fights
Let it all go, Feel the love flow.. Never give in, Coz I'll always have a raised chin

[HellDriven]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...717/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...11#post7894111

[Vinzr]

This was pretty good man. The piece had a clear beginning, middle and ending so structure is a good for me. I like the rhyming scheme until half the thing when it started getting pretty confusing. Flow is pretty good as well. Overall I really liked this and you have a lot of potential. Keep it up.

[chiboymax]

I thought this was pretty decent dawg the piece had some nice emotion to it and I can see good idea in you head. I just thought that your lines were a bit to long and you should shorten that. But ey I ain't gonna say what you have to do. Just do your own thing and what you think is best and keep writing.