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Thread: is this good?

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! nekrowlogikal's Avatar
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    is this good?

    GAS CHAMBER - suffocating all with no remainders
    choking on saliva and the vapor - ruling of a dictator
    battered and naked, baked ‘em inside ovens when they chained ‘em
    got some children? taken - shaken by the hangings of the necks
    -
    feet dangling, strangling, the knots are tangling
    another hangs again by the rope; choked and slayed again
    victims of the experiments injected with infections
    genetically mutated corpses stacked - abnormal flexions

    im looking for a topic to write about and to master at something and deep subjects might be my thing. sooooo the question is: from these 2 bars, wat did i do right/wrong so i could continue on making sure i do the right things for the rest of the song?

  2. #2
    Not Retired The Archetype's Avatar
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    Re: is this good?

    i'll tell you what you did wrong... you posted this in the wrong section... go to open mic... read the rules... post there

  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title! nekrowlogikal's Avatar
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    Re: is this good?

    i know but its not what i wrote that this topic is centered on; its the other half of the question which asks wat i could do to elevate the skill before finishing and if i should continue on with it.

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