Until The End Of Time

[Toon]

When life as we know it is over, whos gonna come out on top
In 100 years who will care what guns been popped
Whos lives been ended, who was befriended
Who matters in life, who mattered the most
Who was your wife, who gave your reception its toast
Look past the flaws, who helped the world in its cause
Just take a pause, and look further than lifes draws
When you leave this life, what will they remember you by
Knowing your limits, looking past the sky
Helping those who cry and plead with them til they die
When you finally leave, whats gonna matter?
As your life melts to glass, who will let it shatter?
The climb to heaven aint easy, take more than a ladder
Takes more than popularity, clothes, and people
When people make your life into a movie, who will be in the sequal?
Are we all equal, or is that what your forced to believe
Dont understand what you want, whos to tell you what you need
Life cant be divided, you can only add to it
Weither you lie, or stay true to it
How did you use a friend, it worth to lean on and depend
When its all over, who will be in the end?

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...242/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...299/index.html

[QwarterZ]

This came off more as a poem to me, nothin' stood out
but the realness of it....had you scared a minute ehhh?
it reminds me of that track by Nas, I can't recall the name
but it's kinda like that, just watered down a bit on your behalf
still a alright piece tho'......keep writing

[Erebus]

I believe the heights of this piece are actually the philosophical thoughts put into it. It is not very lyrical and lacks some of the metaphorical sides and the rhyming and flow that are needed to turn a pice from good to great, but as an actual concept and thought you had a very good idea. Your transitions are not forced either, although quite an easy feature when your rhyming is quite basic. A good read in terms of making you think afterwards, but not a very strong lyrical piece. If you could work on the rhyming and vocabularly, as well as the flow, then this will be a very strong piece. Keep working at it.

RTF: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...265/index.html