*Mag made by Wordz AhGod.
1-2 Punch Wordz Sexy Mag Edition
Week 3
what up with you bitch ass pussy hole niggas? Once again, its your favorite text battlers arch-nemesis.. Wordz AhMonsta. Im doing this mag basically to do my part for the league that I plan to OWN soon enough ( :
This season so far, we’ve had a high quantity with low quality drops. We need to work on stepping our games up for the next upcoming weeks. I personally don’t enjoy an easy win but I’ll take it.. so as long as C.A.S. and Tim keep feeding you guys to us like this then there’ll be nothing you can do but try and get better by looking at what the issues are with your punches and why they’re being shitted on by most voters. Before I go into the sections that all you self centered homo’s would more then likely want to read, I would like to touch on a few minuet things so bare naked with me in the sun covered in baby oil for a few pages..
Voting
Ok, I personally don’t give a fuck about voting because I know the end result will simply be either C.A.S. or Tim posting something along the lines of “Wordz Wins” but a few other battlers are questioning votes that are being made by trend followers. Most of you know who you are because if you honestly put a vote down in the Mimic vs GOW battle then you should have been swallowed and not birthed. Its one bar per battler so just leave some feed saying, Allen Knights wording was straight left ass cheeks and Hush’s verse was border line dumpster juice but it rhymed better and hit harder. That will show that you at least put some small thought into your useless little vote.
PS. If your not an American and don’t understand how the freedom to vote for anything works.. ask your neighbor (preferably some one who IS an American cos all other country’s can suck it)
NO Shows
I ROFL deeply at bitch ass pussy holes who can’t drop 2 measly little lines a week on time. Personally, I try to drop super early.. mainly because I don’t care who you are because your not going to win but still.. its something less that I have to worry about and gives me time to rack up some good votes around here. If you don’t mean to join and post on time then just die in real life so that you don’t take up air that could be helping productive people from doing real shit. You are worthless and should be Hulk Hogan kicked dumb hard in yo neck down through a fucking window while your wife and kids watch. Or just banned from the league, which ever comes first.
What is the best way to Elevate??
Are you newb constantly getting stomped by the likes of Hush, Wordz AhGod, GodofWar, Archetype, Vulgar (and everyone else that he bites that week) and your tired of it?? Need some tips to get better? Well here you have it nerds.. this is my getting better story.. be adviced, it’s a long rocky road so grab yourself some coffee and a smoke..
On my way up.. I joined multiple leagues every where and dropped as consistently as I could. I the time I had the chance to battle people like Butler in a champ match (he K.O’d me), Justify in a champ Match (he also K.O’d me lol), I battled Hush (who K.O’d me), battled tettris (who helped me with wording) Battled Nick Fletcher (who created the main blue print for my style) battled J. Hens (who I dropped as against.. Im sorry J.Hens.. where ever you are in the matrix) and a lot of other big names and some not so big names that still taught me something about what it is we’re doing here. Those times where crazy fun, and with text being in the poor state that it is because nobody joins AND shows to league battles anymore anywhere.. its quickly becoming a thing of the past and text battlers are getting slower, and dumber and cockier then ever forgetting that shit is supposed to be fun. None of us are going to get record deals just cos we be $pitacular in a battle, but the shits mad fun and full of laughs for me. Bottom line is, if you want to get better, you got to get your hands dirty and travel a bit and take a look at the different styles other then RB’s. Most of RB’s best battlers have gone to other leagues and got slaughtered either cos of they’re choice of style or just lack of dickrider votes.
Wording Help
A lot of members may have dope concepts but just end up butchering them simply because of a lack of basic knowledge in wording and why its so important. I am not an expert on the subject and wording is one of my personal demons as well. Im pretty decent at it and Ive been known to reworded about half of the punches in LLL’s highlight reel for the past 4 seasons.
yo retard, you talk shit bout people on the weekly chat you start thinking your HARD
you gonna need more than a SHIN gaurd,twat, or your gonna come out sexually scared
Simple concept.. the basis of this bar is mercenary1’s nameplay on shin. The first thing you will notice about this bar might be that its super long for such a small concept. There are a lot of unnecessary words that can be found in this bar that simply taking away from the wording in this punch. Below you will notice that Ive bolded these words to make it easier to see..
yo retard, you talk shit bout people on the weekly chat you start thinking your HARD
you gonna need more than a SHIN gaurd,twat, or your gonna come out sexually scared
now at this point you’ll notice that line still isn’t right.. the first thing to attack would be his first line (also known as the setup line). His set up line isn’t terrible but it has nothing to do with the second line. With a nameplay like Shingaurd, you can keep this setup line but it will need some basic rewording to get you started.
I don’t care what this Guile do.. I’ll beat his ass stupid
N’ we can see shin guard.. while I come at his top with Hadukens.
Notice the extreme change in wording and over all concept.. I put a wordplay in the setup using guile/guy’ll to strengthen the set up but not over power the punch or wordplay in execution line (the second line). By cutting words out and replacing other words you can make the concept as good as you ant it to be depending on your outlook on flow and how you want to come at your opponent. In this punch I used the same Shin guard/shingaurd concept that was used in mercenary1’s punch and simply moved a few things around so that the word shin guard isn’t the most important thing in his bar but it supports the direction of my punch making it have more solid and crisp wording for a stronger punch. Every site and league has different styles that they follow.. so don’t just stick to the style RB likes just cos this is where your are from.. remember that most LLL battlers aren’t even from this site naturally and just come in when the season kicks off and don’t usually post anywhere else.
Top 10 Lines (in no order at all)
Blacketh tells stories, but nobody understands the kid,
son, God didn't put you here.. my dick n' some slut did
10. The Saint vs Blacketh
I heard T packs da hammer, they goin have to pray for u fagget
cos my fist'll put this tool man down.. n make Tim Taylor a casket.
09. Wordz AhGod vs Tim
your records 1-2..so if your dope please show and prove it
tbh only way I see punk breaking even is if I throw him threw it
08. Hush vs STL Punk
claim ur on top ur lying , dude your acts are bluffs
when your race to the top was only caused
...cuz u running from rats and bugs
07. El GOD vs Trebol Kleff
i'ma let u believe the hype, cuz ur nothing real just all mouth
N ur revolution is beginning....with a poster of prince and a laced blouse
06. Quest vs Hologram
Bitch in poker you'd be the Queen n' I bet you'd fold after our meeting
when you've only raised ur hand to cover ur face from this fucken beating
05. Hologram vs Quest
He had a ruptured childhood, & prayed his mom could end it
So its been the same ole S.O.B story, even though she was a hoe to begin with
04. N.R. vs Vulgar
I have integrity, honor, respect<--3 things this whore lacks…
I’m building character……he’s building characters on world of war craft
03. Vulgar vs N.R
lmao@ the dandruff in ur hair..only word you kno is stupidity.
water head nigga your garbage!!!..who the fuck gas UTALITY?.
02. MarvJ vs Versatality
ya av is twisted, lookin sketchy ...n mines been known to kill some bitches
so i'll simply spin off some caps ....and pop a purc like i had a pill addiction
01. Slowhands vs Purcepshun
My WTF’s of the WEEK
WTF #1 Terror Eyez vs Rahul
Your at the point of no return, so don't get bullied into giving some head,
I'll Cut your life short, now I'm sure he won't have trouble living on a edge.
Vs
this bitch is at wrong place,at wrong tym cuz i'll rape him hard like a pirate/
then you are gonna bleed hard,not frm limbs but pussy,like u mesnturate/
This battle had home shit written all over it.. if you voted on this and didn’t say WTF at least ones, then your man hood is now currently in question. Minimize the anal sodomizing that’s going on here.. its not a good look for ya’ll at all ) :
I would also like to add that Rahul’s punch made my spell check look like a bloody tampon. WTF is wrong with your spelling and grammer fam??
WTF#2 Mimic Bites an OM piece and gets banned
Ok, who the fuck does shit like this ever?? In all my years of owning and slaying newbs, this has got to be the first ive seen on a case like this. If your retarded enough to bite an OM piece then you should banned for life from life. Mimic, you should end yourself.
WTF#3 Blacketh getting votes after feeding and people claiming atheist lines are still nice??
Blacketh tells stories, but nobody understands the kid,
son, God didn't put you here.. my dick n' some slut did
Saint
Vs
king tells stories too, his tales of MMA with no proof
but no ones believing saint's words like an atheist group ..
Blacketh
To my extreme celestial knowledge, you are not allowed to feed on another battlers punch and blacketh did exactly that and its obvious. He also dropped an atheist/religion line that was getting props and votes. At this stage I expect some voters to say this cos they might still be new to the scene but the majority should have a fix on this common knowledge.
WTF#4 Ghost Town
This week was no show city.. hopefully we can push out the no showers towards the direction of the backburner and clear way for those who have the time to drop and shit.
TOP GUYS
West:
GodOfWar 4 – 0
This is one of my favorite people on Facebook (I don’t have too many friends ) : there) I write all of his lines so he is dope beyond belief. GOW has made a name for himself in FL and is looking to prove to the rest of you average joes that he’s good enough to carry the word GOD in his name. (only the dopest battlers ever have it in case you assholes haven’t noticed) I see him going as far as he wants to go this season if a no show or two don’t interrupt his climb to the top.
Caesar Augustus™ 4-0
To me Augustus is ass, nothing personal but he hasn’t really showed potential in his writing and so far has been slipping through with mediocre shit. Im sure he can come dope if needed though because I remember battling some one with that name in a past life a few hundred years ago in another league/site. Im expecting to see something more from this nerd so hopefully he’ll step up and stop disappointing me.
H.T 3 – 0
This kid is another motivated new guy who doesn’t seem to have been doing this long but has had some pretty good success. He I can tell he’s always up for a challenge and can understand that this shit is all in fun. Ive seen him improve gradually but he’ll need to step it up if he plans to champ anytime this season.
Switchaman 3 – 1
Switchaman is the type of guy that would have the battle of the year any day if put against some one as dope as Alyse Flowers. He’s still growing metaphorically and has a long way but seems to be having good time along the way. Long out for this guy to be in for years to come and still not do shit though. ( :
C.A.S. 3 – 1
My favorite computer programming on RB, CAS does weird shit like close FL battles, ban a lot of newbs and no give a flying fuck about your issues. Last week almost missed his own dead line and almost caught another L. Ive also noticed that he put himself in the opposite side of the World from me and my animal hands. This was the smartest move this man has EVER made.. cos I KEEL YOU!!
The Archetype 3 – 1
Every ones favorite pervert is back and his sigs and avy are as nasty as ever. For those of you who do not know, that is actually Archetype in those pictures posing for all his fans on RB in hopes to get dickrider points. So far it seems to be working as he’s only lost ones and holds a pretty good record on FL. He was in the season champ match last season so he’ll be another guy I’ll be requesting for you guys to keep down in the near future.
n.r 3 – 1
Inituals to me are like super heroes who wear masks (compares n.r to Zoro) you know those to crazy little letters mean something, you just don’t know what the fuck it is. Not that you care but you probably will when n.r decides to come in swing and K.O. on his way to the top. Keep an eye on this one as well.
…King Autistic 3 – 1
Not really sure how he got 3 wins but *applauds* there you go loser.. that’s your five seconds of fame. Suck it..
Cry 3 – 1
Cry has just about every award on this site other then the LLL hw/Season champ and Legendary Member awards *laughs hysterically* he doesn’t really have to prove anything to RB members anymore and just does this for fun and to show the old EMO still got it.
Per$onal 3 – 1
I don’t really know this cat other then my battle with him in LLL where I dropped super played ass nameplays on him on purpose and some how still got the K.O win lol.
East:
Allen Knight 4 – 0
This might be one of the guys to beat.. he has a good following of dick riders to include Hush so all voters must get to his battle before he drops his bias ass votes lol jk nigga, you know you straight haha. But naw, he’s a cool dude who can also go far in this league if he applies him self to do so. Keep an eye open for this nerd, he’ll be on the come up.. no homo.
Verbal hologram 4 – 0
VH was here last season and although I can’t remember what the fuck he did to slip by everyone un-noticed until the very end, the bottom line is that if your not careful.. he will slip past you with out you even knowing you were battling him until its too late. Im putting a price on his head, anybody who keeps him from getting to the champ match will get a cookie. I expect to see a flood of niggas hate voting and rallying around his threads from now on waiting to post something hateful. Go my minions.. do my evil bidding and place heavy judgment on his bitch ass.
Slowhands 4 – 0
Slowhands reminds me of me in a parallel universe where I suck and shit just doesn’t go my way. Personally I like his attitude on things cos he doesn’t really care for the most part. Dudes serving time in Iraq (saving the world) and still has time to post on RB.. fuck conveys and peace missions, god forbid he misses a dead line or tarnishes his internet record. Well, bottom line is.. at the moment his record says that he’s doper then you so get on his level bitch.
Wordz AhGod 4 – 0
Hi ( :
Purcepshun 3 – 1
The self proclaimed veteran, he’s just below average but with some work and a little dedication he’ll still be just below average. Nigga kill yo self, cos who ever gave you that loss just put yo bidniss out there.. this is you chance to tell em why you mad son.
Puncha Nasty 3 – 1
I LOL heavily at this kid, I think he’s like 4 years old or some shit but he’s got a good sense of humor to match his sausage fingers. He may not be shit now but give him some time and his progression’ll depend on him.
Interview
Earlier on in the week I had a chance to sit down and talk with the 1-2 punch mod of the week C.A.S. (sorry Tim but you suck at life and should be sweet chin music’d in the face by Shawn Michaels). I had some interesting questions to ask him and here’s what he had to say;
1# How did you get into RB and what was it about it at the time that made you stick around?
I think it was one of my friends that told me about it. Or I just typed in “Rap Battles” on Google and click the first link. And I stuck around because I had about 3 friends in real life that use to post on the board. After they quit logging on, I just stayed, idk why..But here I am today lol
2# As some one on the outside looking in, who do you think have the best chances of taking the title first in week 6 and why?
I dont really understand the question because I'm competing as well lol..But if I had to choose a couple people that I think stand out to me as making it pretty far I'd just have to say everyone that has a perfect record so far or just one loss
3# Ive noticed you don't show any favoritism as the leagues mod, but are they're any people out there that you just don't agree with or who you'd probably punch in the face if you saw them at a club or in the streets roaming around? Or is there anyone you would simply like to battle just for the chance to get them to STFU?
I don't take anything personal on RB..So I dont really hate or have a grudge with anybody, but again if I had to choose some people that I've gotten annoyed with, it would have to be Hush & Shin
4# Who are your top contenders in the end for the season champ spot and why?
Like I said before, just the people that are at the top right now. Just simply because what their doing is working. I don't want to throw any names out there cause I'm not trying to get on anyone's bad side or put anyone down.
5# What do you think could possibly be the downfall or uprise of this league?
Ehh..I'll just say this. People need to calm down with all the complaining, give good votes, drop strong every week, and just enjoy it and have fun. It's not up to Tim and I, it's up to all the competitors on how well the season goes week after week.
Word association.. when you hear these words.. what comes to mind?
1-2 Punch League..
Glad to be back modding this section, especially with Tim
Champ
New Orleans Saints
Contender
If you aint first your last
Super Nintendo
Back in the day when times were simpler
Suspect
Guilty till proven innocent
Breast
My ex in my car today..Sorry, can't elaborate more than that lol
Cockmaster
Wordz AhGod posting the truth in the chat thread haaah
Creampie
Funnier when they don't expect it's cuming. Yes, pun intended
6# what side do you think has the most competition and did you guys intentionally make it that way?
I don't think any side has more competition than the other. Aside from me and Tim being in separate divisions it was random
7# Do you plan on switching people around to keep the competition leveled?
Naw. We'll have a few special matches coming up that'll spice it up, but people won't be switched around to different divisions
any last words or shout outs???
Shout Out to: God0fWar, Caesar Augustus, Allen Knight, Verbal Hologram, Slowhands, & Wordz AhGod for being 4-0, Congrats. Also a big shout out to Tim..Y'all don't realize how much time and work it actually takes to do everything and get everything prepared in the league, so having a good man right there to help out is really nice. Also shout out to all the people that don't ask when the battles will be set up or closed. And as my last words, you guys are what makes the league. If you guys are giving bs votes, dropping weak, etc..Then the season won't be fun. But if you guys drop nice punches, vote fairly, and save the arguments for the pointless chat thread arguments...Then the season will be really good. Choice is y'alls
In Closing
Well gentlemen and Alyse, this was my mag.. if you don’t like it Im really sorry but I can’t seem to find it in my heart to care. Stop dropping ass cheeks and you’ll get the dopest mags in the world coming your way. These mags and leagues are a privilege to devoted members of the sites who want to go above and beyond the weak FL scheme. Act accordingly, stop mouthing off as if your all vets because of your FL success.. it doesn’t mean shit and neither do you as of yet. But by joining this league, you have just taken your first big step in getting your name out there. Keep at it and I’ll holla at ya’ll through out the Week. Special thanks to C.A.S. and Tim for running this league so well and not being discouraged from it by bitching members who complain about battles not being up super early just cos they’re bored and always wanting mags even though they drop garbage or no show all the time.
Wordz AhMonsta out.
