Got no girlfriend, and girls are good for your health,Know what I mean? Uh, at least I work for myself,You see me here, kid, and I rhyme crazy,Used to have a job reading to a rich blind lady,You rhyme crazy, and sometimes you rhyme lazy, But I love this rap game, ?cause rhyming is my baby, Visually, lyrically I?m known as a mystery,Y?all couldn?t even see me on HDTV,
wow..
uhm...
First of all, you need a structure, so that your shits organized and makes sense. You can write it any way you want, but it should look like this...
ashdgajhsgdjahsgdjhasasdasdasdasdasd/
asdasdasdasdasdasdadasdasdadsasdasda/
asdadsasdasdadasdasdasdasdasdasdadas/
asdasdasadadasdadasdadadassdsdasdasa/
ashdgajhsgdjahsgdjhasasdasdasdasdasd/
asdasdasdasdasdasdadasdasdadsasdasda/
asdadsasdasdadasdasdasdasdasdasdadas/
asdasdasadadasdadasdadadassdsdasdasa/
ashdgajhsgdjahsgdjhasasdasdasdasdasd/
asdasdasdasdasdasdadasdasdadsasdasda/
asdadsasdasdadasdasdasdasdasdasdadas/
asdasdasadadasdadasdadadassdsdasdasa/
ashdgajhsgdjahsgdjhasasdasdasdasdasd/
asdasdasdasdasdasdadasdasdadsasdasda/
asdadsasdasdadasdasdasdasdasdasdadas/
asdasdasadadasdadasdadadassdsdasdasa/
each line of random bullshit being half a bar. theres other ways to give it structure, but thats just an example.
Secondly, you need to take your time and figure out what you want in your "verse". Do you wanna go audio with it, or just stick to text rapping/poetry, cuz thats really gonna influence the way you want to write your verse in order to really grab the person thats hearing/reading it
Third, Pick a topic. "im dope" isnt a topic unless you know how to flow with it, and thats only in audio. Self Glorification isnt cool in text 99% of the time. Stick to your one frame of mind. You wanna rap about your psycho ex girlfriend, then do it, but stick to the subject. Dont throw in some random rich blind lady.
Fourth, and most important step to elevating in any area for any reason, is that you need to be able to accept criticism, Both good and bad, and work with it. Take the hate and find a positive. Take the positive and find a reason to work harder. Always practise.
That is all from me for now.
Pz.
-Shawn Mac
http://www.soundclick.com/shawnmacsongs
[youtube]oJsFnFIWRuY[/youtube]
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I'm posting on my ps3 it doesn't allow me to post it normal
Thank you for your comment
Get a new name too.
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Ok, thanks
You understand though right? If your just dickin around from your PS3 cuz your bored then ok, if you want to be even considered something to look at, I'd change it.
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it's going to be while before i get a laptop
if you knew about the pain i felt about the life I was dealtwould you stand there and ask for help or would you fall, ball, would you be a victim to it allwould you crawl, and not try to get up off the flooror would you stand up on two feet and man upand not fall when the wheel begins to stear toughthats a question we all gotta answer ill tell you like this I aint dependin on no damn luck
MC Ghosty here.
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here, I think your trying to rhyme too much. Its hard to follow your bars sometimes without a structure, but yeah. Thats what I got from that. Showing your power to rhyme is cool, but you gotta be able to still say something with it, and not just ramble on or its just gonna sound lame most times.
kinda sounded like you stuck to a subject I think...?
More so then last time anyways, so good job I guess. Keep workin on it.
In my opinion man, if you really wanna get better and gain the skills, go straight poetry for a while first before trying to rap. Doesnt have to be all sentimental n girly shit, but just a softer slower type of pace. Build your flow from that, and then after a while, your writing content will improve, as will your ability to communicate through writing as opposed to the spoken word. Cuz people cant hear you, and cant hear the way you want them to sound. You need to be able to express yourself through writing in ways that most people dont/cant.
Thats my word for the day
Hope it helps..
Pz
-Shawn Mac
http://www.soundclick.com/shawnmacsongs
[youtube]oJsFnFIWRuY[/youtube]
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Might be cause of the text format, but it felt really rushed. I can't imagine you being able to do this audiowise without running out of air somewhere after the first line or two. definitely needs structure, tho.
hes on his ps3, he cant make a structure. its lame. lol
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He could use the slash button/Pretty cheap feature that I'm sure his PS3 will have.Originally Posted by Shawn Mac...
^^ Fair enough. I thought about that right after I posted last night lol
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Got a girl in the trunk
How long will she last
She won't remember anything she is too fucking drunk
I went out with her in the past
Driving down the quiet lane
My head is bouncing with rage
She caused me too much pain
I remember when she hit me on stage
She left me for a guy called Mitch
My life is no longer worth living
She just a fucking drunken bitch
That time at thanksgiving
Tied a boulder to her feet
Dragged her across the floor
She a fucking cheat
Lots of gore
MC Ghosty here.
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