LLL Season 11: Week 3
Standard Rules (can be found in LLL Office)
Check in by Wednesday
Drop by Midnight Friday (Eastern Time)
16 Lines Minimum
Vote on 5 Battles
Leave links in your check in or lose 2 votes per missing link
Good Luck
LLL Season 11: Week 3
Standard Rules (can be found in LLL Office)
Check in by Wednesday
Drop by Midnight Friday (Eastern Time)
16 Lines Minimum
Vote on 5 Battles
Leave links in your check in or lose 2 votes per missing link
Good Luck
Last edited by Hexzen; July 26th, 2009 at 11:37 PM
yeeeaaah. check
Originally Posted by phlymo, last weeks sign in thread
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
Lets go knuckle for knuckle, pound for pound, you’d never even the score,
dude couldn't get on a top joint winning a wrestlin match of fuckin thumb war.
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
Your the fraudulent follower.. words cant describe how wack you are,
cus I'm right on the money when I say you look like a wanna be $pitactulare.
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
So consider me your grave digger, your priest couldn't take my throne,
cus on this battle field I burial and you can get to pickin your tombstone.
die slow bitch.
Dear goof,
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
You’re a planned joke, ya parents conceived u for laughs, u have no damn hope
When I heard Smoka killed Hex easily, I assumed that u died from second hand smoke
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
Need I remind u, the day pigs fly is the only time that u’ll ever outshine dude
He thought his chances of winnin finally came when someone first mentioned the swine flu
This fag’s a mess! I read his last verse and couldn’t help but look up and laugh
Like “negro please!”…so I can extend my leg far enough to shove my foot up his ass
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
Sincerely 18,
$criptures
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
lol. pretty harsh, not much creativity though.
Lets go knuckle for knuckle, pound for pound, you’d never even the score,
dude couldn't get on a top joint winning a wrestlin match of fuckin thumb war.
meh.
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
decent wp..horribly worded.
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
alright..decent i suppose.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
miss.
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
nope.
Your the fraudulent follower.. words cant describe how wack you are,
cus I'm right on the money when I say you look like a wanna be $pitactulare.
decent.
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
nah.
So consider me your grave digger, your priest couldn't take my throne,
cus on this battle field I burial and you can get to pickin your tombstone.
ok...
Dear goof,
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
alright..not to hard of a punch.
You’re a planned joke, ya parents conceived u for laughs, u have no damn hope
When I heard Smoka killed Hex easily, I assumed that u died from second hand smoke
nah.
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
alright...
Need I remind u, the day pigs fly is the only time that u’ll ever outshine dude
He thought his chances of winnin finally came when someone first mentioned the swine flu
nope. swine flu stuff is getting old.
This fag’s a mess! I read his last verse and couldn’t help but look up and laugh
Like “negro please!”…so I can extend my leg far enough to shove my foot up his ass
fuck no.
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
not too good.
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
wow reach for a concept/personal. no good.
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
meh. terrible wording.
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
played concept and you put no twist on it.
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
vs.
nothing
Vote//Hexzen - was consistent at times and had a couple nice punches...scripture had some pretty played material, and worded his bars horribly so his punches never really got across..bad battle.
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RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
Lets go knuckle for knuckle, pound for pound, you’d never even the score,
dude couldn't get on a top joint winning a wrestlin match of fuckin thumb war.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
^I ALMOST didn't put this up, thinking that the wordplay wasn't used correctly.. cuz it has to make sense up to the word, then you can flip it.. as in "my verses metal" has to make sense both ways.. obviously it's s'pose to be "my verses met all", so yes, it makes sense that way.. but AT FIRST GLANCE "my verses metal" doesn't.. HOWEVER, it also sounds like "my verse is metal", so you're gettin' really lucky here.. your other wordplay (in your closer) was NOT used correctly tho, and didn't get so lucky..
Vs
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
Ehh, I was expecting more from Scriptures here.. cuz I've seen better from him in FL, dropping only 10 lines, which is pretty weird.. he did have a couple quotables tho, and his "wallets" wordplay WOULD have been cool if I hadn't already used it, lol.. the rest was just gay concepts.. like I said, I was definitly expecting more from Script.. Hex dropped decent.. he got lucky on one of his wordplays, but the other one wasn't used right.. he had one more stinger than Scriptures when it comes to quotables, and a couple of his misses weren't as bad as a some of Script's.. CLOSE, but.... \\//ote: Hexzen
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
aight/ok
Lets go knuckle for knuckle, pound for pound, you’d never even the score,
dude couldn't get on a top joint winning a wrestlin match of fuckin thumb war.
corny
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
nah.. the wp is fine but the setup is contrived
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
played double-meaning
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
set up was slightly long/awkward, otherwise average
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
nahhh, didn't like the concept
Your the fraudulent follower.. words cant describe how wack you are,
cus I'm right on the money when I say you look like a wanna be $pitactulare.
no
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
ehh
So consider me your grave digger, your priest couldn't take my throne,
cus on this battle field I burial and you can get to pickin your tombstone.
wp doesn't work both ways smooothly, meh
vs.
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
simple and or played, that sports team has been around after all
You’re a planned joke, ya parents conceived u for laughs, u have no damn hope
When I heard Smoka killed Hex easily, I assumed that u died from second hand smoke
iffy concept, didn't capitalize on the pesonal effectively
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
played and not well worded
Need I remind u, the day pigs fly is the only time that u’ll ever outshine dude
He thought his chances of winnin finally came when someone first mentioned the swine flu
nah
This fag’s a mess! I read his last verse and couldn’t help but look up and laugh
Like “negro please!”…so I can extend my leg far enough to shove my foot up his ass
nope
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
aight
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
nah, reaching
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
dont really like it
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
aight i guess
v/ hex, scriptures your sign in links were better, this wasn't up to par
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
vs.
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
not a bad battle here.. i was actually pleasently surprised. both of you had alot of good concepts and even though the quotes only show that there were a few in each of ur verses.. there were alot of near-quotes. i dont really have time to go too much in depth but i have to give the win to the person who executed those concepts to the best, and i think hexzen had the better wording, thus better punches overall. this is actually quite a close battle though, but yea.. im going to have to go with hexzen.
vote - hex
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
vs.
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
Hex, ur opener was dope, a nice personal with good wording. Bolt thing seemed a bit forced n' also that was dope when it was happening, but now its a bit old. The other quotables were good, but still they coulda been worded better. $criptures, u started off dope with the few bills thing, I was really feelin' that. The avy line was nice cuz it does kinda look like that, but other than that, I felt like u had some corny stuff like the foot in the ass thing, and also ya bars are a bit too long. Next week try this. After u write the bar, look at every word and see if there is a way to say the same thing with fewer syllables. Usually u can find a way, and what this will do is make ur lines more direct and harder hitting. Anyway, while both had dope openers, I think Hex's plus a little more consistency got him this.
Vote - Hexzen
Hex:
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
decent diss...nothin special..
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
shit was nice right there....nice wordplay
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
decent shit here...a bottle of mad dog will have a mufugga on tilt lol..
vs
$criptures:
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
lol...pretty cool flip here
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
lmao...funny shit
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
i liked this...cool wordplay decent diss...
this battle could definitely go either way in my opinion...hex's verse a straight...had some cool shit and some shit that was basically kinda blah...$scriptures verse came off a lil bit fresher to me so ima go against the grain here and vote for him but man $cript you are just barely scrapin by on my vote
v/ $criptures--more originality and creativity and some decent punches to go along with it...
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
Good personal...
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
Eh...aight...
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
Clever, kinda forced...but cool...
Your the fraudulent follower.. words cant describe how wack you are,
cus I'm right on the money when I say you look like a wanna be $pitactulare.
Nice personal...I been wondering why he copies Spit myself...
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
Eh...never seen this before...clever...wording's off...but nice...
VS
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
Funny...
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
Better...
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
Eh...
Just more...and better shit from Hex...
Clearly.
Scriptures is using all old type shit..."strike a pose", "second hand smoke"...
Seen the shit before...lots...
Peace
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
vs
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
there wasn't a lot that was awful... but both came with a lot of bars that were just average... Hex just came better...
vote Hex...
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
Fuck you..But no hate this was funny
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
vs
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
Close battle/I got hex by a bar
Vote/Hex
Last edited by Barz.; July 26th, 2009 at 08:59 PM
RAS was gettin signed n Phly looked you over thats fuckin brutal kid,
your such n embarrassment to the league, a proven biter got in before you did.
(heh, ok. wording kinda awk. but cool)
Lets go knuckle for knuckle, pound for pound, you’d never even the score,
dude couldn't get on a top joint winning a wrestlin match of fuckin thumb war.
(ok)
$ beat Hex? Haaa I'm laughin, my punches will cause your dome to spin,
could look exactly like Bolt but even then no1 believes Usain thinking you'll win.
(seen too much)
I come through, give bitchs a look, they blush n tend to follow,
while this virgins livin his life headless... like the Horsemen of Sleepy Hollow.
(set-up was wrong, nice going for creativity though)
You came weak in your boot match n another go in this league gets spoiled,
my verses Metal the expectations,
N yours fold under pressure like Aluminum Foil.
(too forced)
So its no wonder this rookie falters under my mighty clinch,
He got the boot wit a record of 1/4 n couldn't elavate past a quarter of an inch.
(creative, ok)
Your the fraudulent follower.. words cant describe how wack you are,
cus I'm right on the money when I say you look like a wanna be $pitactulare.
(the set-up of punch makes this work for me, coo)
Plus he’s of the queer type always ends up lookin like the fuckin punk,
fruit figured he’d look fierce with a Mad Dog but now he’s stumblin drunk.
(eh, ok)
So consider me your grave digger, your priest couldn't take my throne,
cus on this battle field I burial and you can get to pickin your tombstone.
(decent-ish)
Dear goof,
you’re so damn broke and cheap that ya girl don’t wanna be near you
A few bills will get her on my team quick, like a Terrel Owens career move
(simp. statement-ish)
You’re a planned joke, ya parents conceived u for laughs, u have no damn hope
When I heard Smoka killed Hex easily, I assumed that u died from second hand smoke
(nah)
Hard rights unload on Hex, as he swings back frantically tryin to keep this fight composed
But swingin punches ain’t ya fortay bitch, you even have trouble tryna strike a pose
(nah, did this in my second battle)
Need I remind u, the day pigs fly is the only time that u’ll ever outshine dude
He thought his chances of winnin finally came when someone first mentioned the swine flu
(eh, wild but not good)
This fag’s a mess! I read his last verse and couldn’t help but look up and laugh
Like “negro please!”…so I can extend my leg far enough to shove my foot up his ass
(ehhh.. no)
…which is something u should be used to. The way u get ya ass kicked is unreal dude
You have trouble filling a vet’s shoes, but no trouble havin they shoes fill you
(wow, more foot in ass material. this is slightly better than above but still not good)
The future’s easily predicted, u’ll never win and u’ll only own defeats
Even ya avy’s psychic abilities reveal that ur record is bout to be 0 and 3
(nope)
He’s prone to bang 9’s, get down or lay down is what he told his victims
He has 2 Mac 10’s…for this pedophile to claim he’s flirtin with some “older women”
(eh, nah)
I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger, but ur fat bitch u can’t afford or house
Cuz if she ain’t breakin ya wallets more than likely she’s breakin ya floor or couch
(decent)
Hex came smoother and more creative, Scriptures was pretty off
v- Hex
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