Goodbye

[Johnny 6-feet]

Goodbye

Pull the curtains closed, turn the light switch off
And switch off, zone out, exhale, big cough
I'm alone now, isolated in my little cave
Freed from the slaves and not a bit afraid
A free thinker, free speaker, answerable to none
Cut off from the human race until the fable comes
A new prophesy to drop on me glowing in the distance
Slowly approaching waiting for the right for instance
I'm tired, i'm exhausted, my plans have been thwarted
Body's battered, spirit's bruised, thoughts deported
I need this break, i need these drugs, need some time to fly
A fresh fire for this phoenix to change and climb the sky

I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye
I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye

Can't describe the catalyst, that irked this dramatist
A couple of sprained wrists or vodka that got me pissed
Maybe it was 5000 miles of travelling, constant battling
Or no escape hatch which gave my brain a hammering
A 6am call, lifting a thousand pounds
Arguments with the ignorant, we went a thousand rounds
I turned their power down, i was counting the cost
Preaching sermons in the company and outting the boss
But too much, too often, now i'm a misanthrope
Hating the human race so i have to elope
To the coast, and shut myself off, nail the door shut
And spend time with the raw cut, escapism, more sluts

I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye
I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye

I've spend months now meditating in sanctimony
And gain such perspective you couldn't tell a phony
No need to telephone me, now i'm broadcasting
And the roars lasting, infused with raw passion
I'm ready to re-emerge, give sunlight to herbs
School flocks of dumb birds with knowledge, golden words
A new chapter in the saga, blessed by the holy father
Inner wisdom from isolation, i stood still but travelled farther

I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye
I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye
I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye
I'm out, so long, i'm ghost, i'm gone
T-T-F-N, fuck off, goodbye




Good to be back rb.

[sILLable]

ill piece as usual....always a solid drop from you homie...long time no communicate...loved the vocab..it was subtle..never over the top but always hot...your rhyme scheme is solid...i loved the story...never fell off point....whats T-T-F-N??eother way no complaints..i just returned to rb myself..welcome back..ill be droppin something new soon..as always keep droppin the hottness.~1~

[Johnny 6-feet]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...se-390244.html

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...al-389914.html


Cheers for the rep treazon, and TTFN means 'ta-ta for now' btw.

[Esc0BosS]

dope piece actually, nuthin spectacular on a lyrical side, but the flow was smooth, nice easy rhyme scheme...
agree with the other dude, really good use of vocab but not over the top at all...good topic and execution on that bitch, but depite the vocab i still felt it was a bit simplistic

^^ maybe thats just me tho, regardless, good read, props on this...solid drop... stay up #1

[Johnny 6-feet]

22 views, 2 replies. Goddam, rb never changes.

Booting this up ^^^^^^^

Leave links people, i'll rtf.

[Baron Mynd]

lmao @ the hook
that was wild, i felt that thought and
thought the TTFN was funny as hell...
not sure if that was the intention but
i enjoyed it a lot. also you have a real
steady flow to your joints... making it
flow like butter and its obvious you
know what you're doing here. your
writing establishes that. that raw passion /
broadcasting couplet was siiiiiiiiiiiick [ !! ]

Feeling this one fam. Return the feed...

[Johnny 6-feet]

Booting up one more time. Leave links people, i'll rtf.

[Rosetti Frost]

nice poetic piece......

flowed pretty nice.......vocab was all there......

rhyme scheme was pretty nice........

I saw some nice multis thrown in there which helped it flow......

overall nice drop..........worth the read.....


I hope to see more from you because your storytelling is pretty good.....

everything meshed well together........nothing was bad at all.....

oh yeah what is T-T-F-N


please rtf
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ab-390347.html

[Johnny 6-feet]

Ta Ta For Now (TTFN)

One more time to boot this shit up, Leave links people.

[Intellexual]

Can't describe the catalyst, that irked this dramatist
Feels forced. Rhyming it with "got me pissed" feels awkward too, but it may have been less so without the quoted choice.
I've spend months now meditating in sanctimony
And gain such perspective you couldn't tell a phony
Clever wordplay, but the setup feels forced. When you continued into "[n]o need to telephone me", that seems to dwell on the prior wordplay or try to get the audience to notice what you've done. If you'd properly set it up, without the awkward rhyme, you may not have chosen or needed to superfluously expound.
I'm tired, i'm exhausted, my plans have been thwarted
Tired and exhausted are redundant. When you didn't use that synonym to support a change in your rhyme pattern, it seems completely pointless to say both. Whereas, if it was used to help transition the rhyme, I may not have noticed it.

[Soule]

Straight piece. Wording was alright, and your flow was pretty cool. This seemed more of either..

A) Not a serious piece and just to show your back...

or

B) a serious piece that you really just wanted to show you could rhyme...

either way the story wasn't all that creative though it was original. Imagery was weak, emotion was decent. Overall not your best, cool flow is all I can really say about it bro. Sorry, liked your Horrorcore verse a lot more.