naw, he didnt have a real breakdown anyway
EL COMPA
BEAZY813
naw, he didnt have a real breakdown anyway
95 views, 1 vote that dont count, 0 RTFs....wow I love this forum,lol
lmao^^^ word
Jay
My flow like young jordan, my battles, mogusey boges steals/
(wait....pause)
actually...Dennis Rodman in off season so high r the skills/
Umm, no, fail..
my bars will kill like this 'twenty-two'(.22) minus two will/
I'm lethal, leave you see thru like thru peepholes u so lil/
Wtf, no..
Im gonna win, in tha 'dalorean', goin back to tha future/
hop in to '0-5' ,not the year, my votes loser/
No AND played..
this easier than my name, this geezer is claimin fame/
name another geek wit a first name predicting shame(EL)/
No..
no need to fix tha prefix, I think it suits you just fine/
helped me kill you in my 'tenth'(bar), I dont need a bottom line/
No, lol..
No 'law and order' in this 'criminal', my 'intent' is killin you/
this line will bloody your whole verse and you just leavin residue/
No..
blessed to know that you would show, cuz im down 'O and two'/
this my 'one' like 'neo', cuz 'n-e-o'l dude could beat you/
Wtf, wow, no..
saw on your last battle that u needed more personals/
so this dumbass went on craiglist-"HORNEY MALE FOR HOES"/
I just gotta be honest.. NO!!
This battle aint for money, get on your knees and give thanks/
cuz if your wins were your bettings, you would always 'chase bank'/
Meh..
but you still look like money with your 'louis vuitton and dk'/
(wait.....pause)
oh never mind, just realized, you were modeling 'run-a-way'
Wow, no, horrible.. overall your verse was SHIT.. n that's it....
EL
his tolerance sucks..this bar's for you easy drunk
hoe , slut and cunt..your all those an easy fuck..[no homo]
Nope..
punchin your gut..so you can get proud of an L to throw up
im thirtsty for a win but, this'll be sweat and easy like soda
No..
i got venom like kobras..while you bone thugs and get busy/bizzy
fuckin gay its sleezy, you needa get school'd just to B easy
Blah..
Uhh, ok, an ATTEMPT but still weak..
i know your quizzing..sick in the stomach that i ate your 1 & 3
but please.. you'r time is up shoot yourself with a gun & leave
Meh.. weak but good compared to his shit, lol..
im done with beef..but still hungary to beat easy like vegetarians
that whole nameplay was better then, all your help from veterans
No, whack..
i'll switch this cuz my last style from above was killing him
like gin..you'll have a better chance overdoesin then a win
No..
Man fuck 8, skip to 1-3 like a pin..its done you got bodied
& wowww you better pray godly..if open mic's your hobby
Pfft.
nowonder you wont mock me..look at your structure its funny
you suck b..& only time ur hot is when old ppl call you sonny
Wow, no
b easy your a nobody..mods feel ashamed when you battle
they know you like uppin so much they name you a hassle
To many lines i drop it's sick..like illness'es, i got this..
so beazy no need for punches ima win just for kicks..
See THAT was nice in my opinion.. good concept, coulda definitly been done better but props..
Flow: Tie
Punches: EL
Wordplay: Neither
Personals: Neither
Structure: Tie
Creativity: Tie
Consistency: EL
\\//ote: EL COMPA
props on votin i just needa elevate, 1-0 uppin
Damn...i usually respect ur votes bar and i know everyone got their own opinion,but i dont agree on both of ur breakdowns, guess i jus gotta wait and see others critique...and this aint feedin cuz i thought compas breakdown was fucked up too...nothin personal jus sumthin i had to say, whatever uppin
Dune, I don't care if you don't agree with my breakdown.. BOTH of your verses were whack.. sorry dudes, I'm just bein honest.. I'm drunk as fuck n ONE line maybe caught my attention n that's it.. just my honest opinion.. I have no reason to to favor either of you, you BOTH need to elevate clearly....
damn i dont wanna know when your not drunk lol and i know my verse could've been wayyyyy better, atleast your bein honest better then lying to usOriginally Posted by Barcotic
^Word, so don't hate.. I was honest.. wait for more voters....
thats all i was sayin bar, imma wait for more critique...dont make this personal my dude...your opinion and my opinin thats it...aint no hatin involvved b
Siswquansh....
[QUOTE=BEAZY813;6815781]My flow like young jordan, my battles, mogusey boges steals/
(wait....pause)
actually...Dennis Rodman in off season so high r the skills/
^^wow epic fail
my bars will kill like this 'twenty-two'(.22) minus two will/
I'm lethal, leave you see thru like thru peepholes u so lil/
^^umm,no to b honest
Im gonna win, in tha 'dalorean', goin back to tha future/
hop in to '0-5' ,not the year, my votes loser/
^^wtf,no
this easier than my name, this geezer is claimin fame/
name another geek wit a first name predicting shame(EL)/
^^no,wheres the punch
no need to fix tha prefix, I think it suits you just fine/
helped me kill you in my 'tenth'(bar), I dont need a bottom line/
^^no real punch,but I crack a smile
No 'law and order' in this 'criminal', my 'intent' is killin you/
this line will bloody your whole verse and you just leavin residue/
^^umm,close,he might just....no fail
blessed to know that you would show, cuz im down 'O and two'/
this my 'one' like 'neo', cuz 'n-e-o'l dude could beat you/
^^hell to the no very forced word play
saw on your last battle that u needed more personals/
so this dumbass went on craiglist-"HORNEY MALE FOR HOES"/
^^yeah the personal ad hmm is a concept but it didnt work u
This battle aint for money, get on your knees and give thanks/
cuz if your wins were your bettings, you would always 'chase bank'/
^^wow,18 lines later a punch wit word play,and this was meh
but you still look like money with your 'louis vuitton and dk'/
(wait.....pause)
oh never mind, just realized, you were modeling 'run-a-way'
^^wtf no but at least im done reading this[/QUOTE]
alright your problem lies in making punch lines,set up and punch ok try going to 1-2 punch and gettin all that wack shit out ya system, then you'll do punches on the fly example of a set up and punch:
when comes to gettin hoes,your sexuality vanishes foreal(set up)
but it magically appears,wit guys,you always tryin to Cop a feel(punch)
see how vanish set up the for cop a feel punch you no the famous magician guy david copperfield but cop a feel word play the wasnt force that took me only took one sec to think of its not that hard ok
you have the idea of punches,its not perfect but at least you tried,work on concepts ,word play,personal...but you really need to elevate.....cause your verse wack no lie wow...im done whew
this was a wack battle,very poorly done verses,ya'll need to get stronger at battlin before attempting to drag out 20 line k,but the winner for actually attempting at punches even tho they were weak as hell was El compa
vote: El Compa
rtf on old battle
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...vs-384587.html
hey ima use that cop a feel punch that shit was kinda hot
im really feelin myself on that one (no homo) but rtf
My flow like young jordan, my battles, mogusey boges steals/
(wait....pause)
actually...Dennis Rodman in off season so high r the skills/
weak
my bars will kill like this 'twenty-two'(.22) minus two will/
I'm lethal, leave you see thru like thru peepholes u so lil/
na
Im gonna win, in tha 'dalorean', goin back to tha future/
hop in to '0-5' ,not the year, my votes loser/
weak.
this easier than my name, this geezer is claimin fame/
name another geek wit a first name predicting shame(EL)/
lot of rhymes but no punch
no need to fix tha prefix, I think it suits you just fine/
helped me kill you in my 'tenth'(bar), I dont need a bottom line/
meh
No 'law and order' in this 'criminal', my 'intent' is killin you/
this line will bloody your whole verse and you just leavin residue/
wording was a little off
blessed to know that you would show, cuz im down 'O and two'/
this my 'one' like 'neo', cuz 'n-e-o'l dude could beat you/
ok attempt
saw on your last battle that u needed more personals/
so this dumbass went on craiglist-"HORNEY MALE FOR HOES"/
na..missed on that one
This battle aint for money, get on your knees and give thanks/
cuz if your wins were your bettings, you would always 'chase bank'/
meh
but you still look like money with your 'louis vuitton and dk'/
(wait.....pause)
oh never mind, just realized, you were modeling 'run-a-way'
weak closer
vs
his tolerance sucks..this bar's for you easy drunk
hoe , slut and cunt..your all those an easy fuck..[no homo]
na
punchin your gut..so you can get proud of an L to throw up
im thirtsty for a win but, this'll be sweat and easy like soda
weak
i got venom like kobras..while you bone thugs and get busy/bizzy
fuckin gay its sleezy, you needa get school'd just to B easy
wasn't feeling it
i know your quizzing..sick in the stomach that i ate your 1 & 3
but please.. you'r time is up shoot yourself with a gun & leave
meh
im done with beef..but still hungary to beat easy like vegetarians
that whole nameplay was better then, all your help from veterans
ok
i'll switch this cuz my last style from above was killing him
like gin..you'll have a better chance overdoesin then a win
ok
Man fuck 8, skip to 1-3 like a pin..its done you got bodied
& wowww you better pray godly..if open mic's your hobby
meh
nowonder you wont mock me..look at your structure its funny
you suck b..& only time ur hot is when old ppl call you sonny
lol na
b easy your a nobody..mods feel ashamed when you battle
they know you like uppin so much they name you a hassle
lol
To many lines i drop it's sick..like illness'es, i got this..
so beazy no need for punches ima win just for kicks..
ok closer
V/EL COMPA
can you guys plz RTF as soon as humanily possible.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...vs-387746.html
3-0 nice on voter's propz will elevate
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