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Thread: The Revised Three Little Pigs (2)

  1. #1
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    The Revised Three Little Pigs (2)

    The Revised Three Little Pigs (2)


    The Wolf was the Pigs great fear,
    because he was mean, big, bad, and loved to eat Pigs.
    The Wolf came up to the first Pigs house which was made of thin,
    worthless and flexible straw.
    The Wolf was not very smart but he found a way to get to the Pig,
    blow his straw house down.
    (The Wolf huffed and puffed at the house,
    his lungs were filled with air,
    and his cheeks were the size of a balloon
    the house fell to the ground without a sound,
    his house blew away like the wind blows leaves.
    The Pig was dead)

    His lifeless body hanged out of the wolfs mouth,
    the bones made “crunch” and “pop” noises,
    the entire time the pig was in his mouth,
    the wolfs face looked like a man struck with joy and pride
    The Pig was gone.
    The second Pig looked just as round as the first,
    he was gentle and innocent like a yellow smiley face.
    The Pig was kind, thoughtful, and smarter then the first,
    but had a house made of needle sticks like a rose bush,
    but looked like,
    new limbs from a tree that were thin and flexible.
    (The Wolf huffed and puffed at the house,
    his lungs were filled with air,
    the wolf blew softly and calmly
    the house collapsed and the sticks were lifted,
    in the air like a hurricane picking massive objects up.
    The Pig was needled with sticks,
    the Pig was dead)
    When the wolf ate the round innocent Pig
    he slowly chewed the bones as they broke,
    into splinters in his mouth,
    he chewed the Pig along with the sharp sticks.
    (The Wolf was dead)


    For It was the third Pig that gave the sticks of wood to the second pig.
    The sticks had spikes on them and the Wolf was cut inside by the spikes.
    The third Pig was smart enough to do this so the Wolf didn’t,
    get around to him.
    The Revised Three Little Pigs (2 pigs)

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  2. #2
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    upin thoughts

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  3. #3
    SmoothCrmnl
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    All i can say is..ooooooooooooooh shyttttttttttt..talkin bout me and X being wack...u and yo pig story don't even make sense...(whats ur battle record)-without no shows and cheap azz wins that you call your own...i don't battle-=poetry aint yo shyt..

    what ya'll think....

  4. #4
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    nigga whats yours.....oooooooooooooooohhhh yeah ur pussy as hasn't battled yet

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  5. #5
    ~*Lil' Miss Caramel*~ Calisto's Avatar
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    I for one thought it was an interesting veiw point, had no rhyming and I would say it was more of a story than a poem but nevertheless it was a good ending. When I saw this I thought of the book they read you in fifth grade (the wolf's side of it) but it's got a twist which was interesting and I liked the way you explained it at the end, it was a little tedious because everyone knew the story and I was searching for the elements that made it a poem but it was a good peice, the twist made this peice tho'
    Formerly known as ThundaThighz
    ~*Divine Diction*~
    "...For life is not a paragraph.
    And death I think is no parenthesis"-E.E. Cummings

  6. #6
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    yeah i know poetry is supposed to have rhming but i did this one by changing the tale

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  7. #7
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    uppin for more thoughts

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  8. #8
    Retierd Lyricbrutalizer's Avatar
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    more people this isn't really poetry but kind of a story thing

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