Speak No More She Said

[Ace of Aces]

Words circulate these veins.
I bleed from the mouth
With each cut to my senses.
My hand breathes the air
that turns our touch to red.

Speak no more she said.

The translation burns with
Every beat of my heart
Causing these eyes to cry songs,
Reaching till my skin
Has something to say.

Speak no more she said.

Drag me by the soul
Till change falls like rain
And fills my lungs, but
Hold my tongue because
Scars can't move on.

Speak no more she said.

Drown every inch of me
In conversations I've never bared,
Then be the sun that evaporates
My living sentence.
Let's read these clouds away.

[Ace of Aces]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ou-383561.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ca-383549.html

drop links.

[David P]

This was sweet and short, i liked the vocab
and the flow of the whole piece. some nice
metaphors in the first 2 stanza's, overall
it was an enjoying read. keep writing.

RTF.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...35-383382.html

[Isn't That rydinoldskool?]

I like this.

*Reads again*

[Ebolorama]

This was a very nice drop. I liked the structure of this a lot. I felt that the detail was very nice and added so much to the imagery. Your vocabulary was very nice as well. The depth of the emotion in this piece was very nice and with the imagery it just made it come to life. I fell that the repetition worked really well in this because at the same time it was subtle and didn't become boring. Very nice drop! i don't have the link yet but please return the feed on my new collab with Legendz

[P. Mortuus]

Subtle yet some ver interesting words choices. It had a slight rhyming to it which made it an easy, fluid read. What I liked most was this stanza:

Drag me by the soul
Till change falls like rain
And fills my lungs, but
Hold my tongue because
Scars can't move on.

There was just something about this that really clung to me whilst I was reading your poem. Good work.

[Ace of Aces]

Thanks homie.

Drop links.

[Dayvid Aimz]

Drag me by the soul
Till change falls like rain
And fills my lungs, but
Hold my tongue because
Scars can't move on.

Speak no more she said.

Drown every inch of me
In conversations I've never bared,
Then be the sun that evaporates
My living sentence.
Let's read these clouds away.

Like towards the end your imagery got more and more vivid....very dreamy piece here but at the same time your descriptions were very DETAILED.

Structure was cool and this was fun to read with the little mantra or whatever in there.....same as the title. Really dug that.

The rhymescheme was good and your wording matched.....nice piece.

[Joseph Grey]

Words circulate these veins.
I bleed from the mouth
With each cut to my senses.

^I liked how you started this, really set the mood.

Drag me by the soul
Till change falls like rain
And fills my lungs, but
Hold my tongue because
Scars can't move on.

^Great choice in words, gave me that imagery.

Drown every inch of me
In conversations I've never bared,
Then be the sun that evaporates
My living sentence.
Let's read these clouds away.

^Great way to end it, i liked the whole stanza a lot.

I haven't read from you in a long time and i really like your style in poetry. This poem was really deep.
keep it up. Peace.

[Orc]

love how you don't conform to rb's style of poetry - as in imagery/structure. anyhow, i liked this. as baron said your syntax was excellent, subtle and thought provoking. i really liked the scars line. i liked the natural rhythm of the piece. also liked the change fall like rain line. clever. the structure being so strict sort of reflects the tone of the piece, focused. so yea, overall another good poem from you.

hit up dorian gray or tales from decrypt please.

[Ace of Aces]

thanks for the feed all.

i hit most of you back i believe.

cool sig Elemental. =)

[Ace of Aces]

drop links~~~

[Ntalek]

word I'd have to say that I also found this piece to be very thought provoking and thought the imagery was worded beautifully....the eyes cry songs line was dope..this piece was short and simple yet jam packed with emotion..I to also enjoyed the sort of rhythm contained in this piece it seemed to flow very natural and nothing seemed out of place...and I thought you ended it well with read these clouds away...that kinda put the finishing touch on things...overall good drop..great read..and sorry I took so long to RTF..been hella busy with homework...

[Ace of Aces]

thanks homie.

drop links.

[Alphaeus]

The way you wrote this, in my opinion was very pure.
I read a piece from you a few months back and thought the same then.
Your work it presented very simplistic, it's not overshadowed by pictures or different colour fonts, and it's great.
Your writing is there for the reader to see and connect with.
A nice short piece here, you have your own style and you present nice writing.