Dear RB
I'm sorry; I can't hear you.
When I give you my heart,
I’m not looking for praise.
I guess I lost the passion,
Or they took it away.
See, I feel pain in my chest,
So I write my poems.
Spill my heart to these kids,
like I know ‘em
But they ain’t feelin’ it,
When I give them my soul, see?
They don’t want Chris Black.
They want the old me.
I hope the cold leaves,
But I know they can’t understand.
No matter how much I rewrite,
& pitch it underhand
They don’t want truth,
Nor do they want facts, people.
I caught my last 3 L’s,
Cause I wrote about Black people.
But maybe I expect too much.
Maybe I should write something dumb.
They’re White teens,
& can’t grasp where I’m coming from.
They want me to make up a story.
Write what I don’t care about,
Not about my life as a Black man.
They say I wear it out.
But I can only remain me,
When faced with the obstacles.
The piece, “Pluck . .Pluck. .Bag,”
was my greatest topical
Better than my Legends work,
So you know that it hurt,
When I lost the battle,
To Brandon’s mediocre verse.
Maybe I’m wrong and arrogant,
For thinking he didn’t out-write Chris.
Or maybe it’s because,
I dropped lines like this:
Originally Posted by Chris Black
When I saw I lost that battle,
I tried to deny it.
How could I loose,
To lines like this:
But maybe he did deserve the win,
So I kept trucking it,
& wrote a verse against Mariah.
I was loving it
It was one of my illest.
No one could deny this.
“That Nigger Shit” was the title,
It went something like this:
Then Mariah dropped a verse,
& I was mad about something.
She wrote a verse,
& managed to talk about NOTHING:
Yet her rambling won that batte,
& I can’t even cope.
No surprise she was discovered,
Recently aiming for votes.
But maybe she had the better verse,
And no one can feel my shit like me.
But when I lost those matches
It felt like they tried to deny me.
Then last week I lost,
And Spoken wrote dope
I thought it was close,
That could have been hope though.
I didn’t get a single vote.
I can’t say it overwhelmed me.
But it pissed me of,
When P Mortuus called my verse "underwhelming”
I put my all out,
For the love of art.
So fuck, P,
Cause that verse was my fucking heart!
Then I saw the similarity in the 3 loses
This is the fact:
I loose whenever
I write about the history of Blacks
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
But so what?
They don’t and won’t get it.
It’s all I can write.
Kids, I live it
They want me to change,
But I can’t hear them.
I’m sorry, and the voters;
I don't fear them.
I’m going to write “that nigger shit,”
No matter the cost.
I’ll spill my heart to you,
& take the GOD-DAMN LOSS!!!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I will take the loss, every fucking week!
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ChrisBlack Lives (1:50:04 AM): I honestly think most people who read my verse, even if I don't mention their names will take it as a diss to them - the whole topical/poetry community.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:50:39 AM): I think I'll lose and maybe that's pat of the point I'm trying to prove.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:50:51 AM): part*
ChrisBlack Lives (1:51:26 AM): That it no longer matters to me. I'm going to write shit that very few may be able to relate to and be unappologetic.
MariahPoetic (1:51:36 AM): from one perspective, that could be true - but it could also leave the people that enjoy you're work or fear you lol, to vote for you out of fear or sympathy.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:51:58 AM): Fear of me never stopped them before.
MariahPoetic (1:52:11 AM): "oh no, chris loses too much...I feel bad for him...v/Chris"
ChrisBlack Lives (1:52:22 AM): More people hate me than like me.
MariahPoetic (1:52:28 AM): not to the extent obviously, but generally speaking, RB politics is shitty.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:52:31 AM): I'm inviting the loss.
MariahPoetic (1:53:13 AM): I don't see the point. You might as well have posted it in OM or PS and left it at that if you're whole point is to lose.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:54:34 AM): My point isn't to lose. It's to make a statement that I'm going to write whatever comes to my mind, no matter what it is & if I lose, I'm fine with that.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:55:24 AM): It just so happens whenever I go with my heart/mind, I lose. When I pick a stupid topic and write a stupid story I don't give a shit about, I win.
MariahPoetic (1:55:29 AM): Ah. Well, then, I suppose you're spot on and I think I'm only getting on about it because me and my brother were both named. It seemed liek you personally chose us both...instead of picking a different person and me...or a different person and him.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:57:50 AM): Well, It was the fact that I wrote three verses somehow relating to Black culter and I loved them and they all lost. That's what ties them together. Before those three loses, I'd only lost like twice in the last three years. These losses all came bunched up and my topic in all of them somehow had to do with the Hirstory of my race.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:57:58 AM): They were just ties together.
ChrisBlack Lives (1:58:36 AM): culture*...Tied*
MariahPoetic (1:59:14 AM): I see. I'm not worried so much about it anymore...my inital thought was like "this dude always seems to think I'm a shitty writer...blah blah blah..."
MariahPoetic (2:00:51 AM): and that's only because I have somewhat got an ego myself probably.
ChrisBlack Lives (2:01:35 AM): Can I post some of this convo in the thread? I actually think I got out a lot more here than I managed in the poem/
MariahPoetic (2:02:00 AM): I don't mind.
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