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Thread: Golden Doves and Sour Plums.

  1. #1
    Shadow Effect
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    1x PS HoF
    Posts
    57

    Golden Doves and Sour Plums.

    She loves reality, she loves him not.
    Picking flower pedals from acquitted roses,
    bleeding out these sharp, green thorns.

    Laying against rotting- ashamed logs,
    of a tree who lost pages of her free will.
    Where the storm of depression broke free
    and tormented the palms of her forest.
    Does this change the average of her day?
    Does this change the dreams of her night?
    Does this change the chapters of her books?
    Will this have a permanent effect on the beauty?

    She changes the words of nursery rhymes,
    feeling it would inflate the heart of children.
    But you can't replace music-

    falling from a sky of starlight and dark clouds,
    dreams are separated from nightmares and reality.
    Capturing the gas of the north star inside a bottle-
    sending it down the river to her sister.

    'Hello reflection, let's trade riddles and dance over seas'
    Where dolphins move like a ballet- as the whales proudly sing.
    Schools of fish; multi-colored, together similar to artistry,
    and such dreams- ruined by the old fisherman.

    She paints her imagination on the great wall of china,
    as children walk through it, cross the yellow brick road.
    Golden doves and sour plums all on one plate-
    because her nature was too mother like to go write back go.
    Last edited by White Abyss; April 18th, 2008 at 12:40 PM

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    Apotheosis/Hidden Talent

  2. #2
    Shadow Effect
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    1x PS HoF
    Posts
    57

    Re: Golden Doves and Sour Plums.

    will have links up tonight.

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    Apotheosis/Hidden Talent

  3. #3
    Born from Ink Spekz.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Age
    35
    Posts
    3,184
    Battle Record
    37-24

    Re: Golden Doves and Sour Plums.

    Fun concept, very abstract ideas which definetly made the piece what it ultimately became, it was a pretty nice piece, mostly based off the ideas with in the piece..the wording could of been a bit more supportive of the ideas, but for the most part it was good. the first stanza was nice..but all the questions at the end of the 2nd was all fine n dandy but it kinda was abrupt n left a lot to be desire, as did the entirity of the piece to be honest, and thats where my biggest fault came within the piece..ovearll nice job.
    Succeed Without Fear



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