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Thread: For My People

  1. #1
    Gully Flow
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    For My People

    For My People

    Inspired by the story of Emmitt Till



    Born into a world of hatred trying to live my life
    The white man steadily trying to deprive my pride
    But I stand strong.. Bold.. look through my eyes...
    See the innocence you've taken away from mankind


    Ignorance, simply didn't know what I'd gotten into
    When it hits you, after something simple as a whistle
    Showing some gratitude, to get back attitude
    And a compliment given makes another color mad at you
    So what is there to be? of me, I just live in thin skin..
    The color God chose to bless with another pigment
    But oh how mad these pigs get.. when you're being yourself
    Now there's a threat for health, have you fleeing for help
    Freedom for self? Haha, I should've just went to the shelf
    Picked up a gun when I was ready and blasted myself
    But...

    For My People

    I get brutally beaten and put through hell
    At the dispose of the bat that this white guy held
    Covered in barbed wire, so I raise my guard hire
    And take this pain till finally, I'm just tired
    Of taking this hatred.. God'll open the gates when
    He see's what I've done to unlock this basement
    That these prejudice white folk been guarding for ages
    So some day a guy can start flippin some pages..
    And notice just how high some of our rage went..
    When we were killed in a deadly engagement..
    By some white men purely fueled by their hatred


    Now my life is lost over simple gestures of kindness
    Not to mention that I suffered a sort of "blind death"
    They tore my eyes out but my heart can still see..
    That the death of me brought the world to their knees
    The tears wept will come back with a vengeance
    And change everything the way things've been, hence
    I sit in this casket, always to remember the day..
    When my people remember what you did to my face


  2. #2

  3. #3
    R.I.P Sean Taylor #21 Chronical's Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    Wow this shit is deep yo i give this a 9/10 this was good......good open mic

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  4. #4
    Gully Flow
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    Re: For My People

    Thanks man but please when you leave feed, people appreciate it if you elaborate more than you are.

  5. #5
    R.I.P Sean Taylor #21 Chronical's Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    iight my bad

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  6. #6
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    Re: For My People

    I really liked this it showed good imagry....was deep. It made me really think about shit. Good drop nigga

  7. #7
    Newbie Cas's Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    nice piece famo i was really feelin this shit

    ..:Living Vanquish:..
    Asperse
    Breathe!
    Cas

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  8. #8
    TreaZoN sILLable's Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    good lord no one knows how to give appropriate feed back...i like this piece...it was simple....had nic eimagery....your wordplay wasnt complex was very evident...it flowed smoothly,nice rhyme scheme and your vocab was choice..all in all this piece was ill...very consitent..nice drop...maybe more multis..il ike tha multis you incorporated in this piece but i dig a lot of multis....dont know why..keep droppin and elevatin.~1~


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  9. #9
    Gully Flow
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    Re: For My People

    Thanks. And please, to everybody except for TreaZon, leave better feed.

  10. #10
    Gully Flow
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    Re: For My People

    Bump

  11. #11
    Deific Ink Entertainment Joel Venom's Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    ncie stuff i def like this piece right here vivid and deep the emotion hit hard..your topicals that i've read so far are pretty nice man...they put a good mindset out there for the readers..keep it up famo

  12. #12
    Gully Flow
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    Re: For My People

    Thanks for the feed man.

  13. #13
    Chop Chop Axe.'s Avatar
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    Re: For My People

    Wow, I actually have never heard of you man, but I liked this to the point where I felt like I've read something from you before and I was like well he drops like this always I bet, I think you might be a consistent writer because you had some nice mellow metas and similies at points, with the imagery to mix I like that alot man a couple wordplay complexed lines in there as well very good your writing strategy to interest the reader is quite good I want to see more drops from you, but in the mean time hit up Gold I think you have hwat it takes to become a dope writer man...


    pZ.
    CΛVEMEN
    Axe


  14. #14
    Gully Flow
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    Re: For My People

    Thanks for the feed man.

  15. #15

    Re: For My People

    Sup nomad, this is I think, the 2nd piece I've read from you. This was good, I like'd it. Simplicity at its best. The rhyme-scheme was cool, made it very easy to read. The emotion of thie piece was deep, without using complex metaphors or similies or major vocabulary, I'm telling you simplicity at its best. The imaginary was good, didn't put any detail in your words but the picture speaks a thousand words brah. I've read about this back in middle school, we was shocked. Nicly done. Thanks for the read.

    Return a favor...

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...fs-351314.html

    1luv.

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    Peace.Love.Unity.Respect.

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