Street Ministry Objective

[H.Notik]

Check It...


Beyond perfection - I sit atop a moutain staring
glaring at the misconception of greatness an all it's essence
I've painted a fallen message through cloud's an dust from comets
but to my dismay, the people reading cant rush the progress...
lush in vomit, the sickness corrupting sonnets
is fixed with resistance through elixirs conducting toxins...
through the minds of minions convinced we must abolish
the futile times of happiness continuing it's rush for promise.
Why? - well...ask yourself the question
did god put us here... to strap our belts with tension?
grasped around the necks of children in search for glory
as apprehension crashes headset's an mutes their story.
...picture a thousand people...man, woman and child
standing atop a building disgusted by looks of the ground
all of a sudden; there ego erupts and wings'll sprout
etching in there skin a destiny concealed in doubt ...
step by step they move together... like lemmings hungry for power
and leap into there end, covered by wax... the sun devoured
so sickening it was to see this, high above the clouds...
but as I looked down, I realized why they say icarus always frowned
bodies fell into a spiral of flesh coated in blood
struggling to contain myself, as the earth began soaking them up...
one by one...souls fled into hysteria
demons grew with hunger as there coffins arose from the mud...
digging through bones...I saw the devil smirk in amazement
pissed that I wasn't apart of the slaughter an his arrangements.
so as I saw him stare at the sky with his disbelievers
I jumped off the moutain top and flipped him the finger...
Wake up - I bet you can hear the alarm...
rarely we're calm...My people this here isn't song...
we've caked up many a profit no matter how feelings were torn
and laced up dealings in closets containing the bomb
BOOM - know the vagrants are gone;
but what happened to peace?
if my nation was strong we'd allow war to rage on the streets
but all was do is race over seas...further corrupting this futile hoax
instead of attacking from inside and constructing a truthful hope
my brothers move an toke...exhale the energy of my words
and pleasantly any enemy will eventually lose there nerve.
Now think for a second and realize defeat is certain
Since the people we most common associate with, hide behind curtains
staining any drape of knowledge with semen ,drained from a monster…
known simply as a prophet we pray to for praise and prosper
DECAY THE GOSPEL – set ablaze the pages we made resourceful
Cuz true knowledge reigns from the days the brain was tortured…
Thoughts contained in misery cuz opinion was not allowed
If you ever dared to be proud…..it was easy –
you were slammed to the ground.
Go to sleep – is it a dream I live in daily?
Going through this mud hole with a fiend I call my family…
Pullin' an tearing at my will an it's dwindling sanity
Killing the amnesty I distill in this sinful obsanity
Few will come stand with me so I've filled my calamity
To the brim of insanity focused in on the phantom, he….
Granted me vanity here I am with a hammer we…
Formed a plan and torched ramblings…Free.
Numb to the word ..that's how non-believer's follow…
They don't bother with tomorrow, but'll suck the air ya breathe,
It's a gauntlet where we hobble bobble monsters wit a scowl
Yet the fantasy's a cancer I created to devour.
RING THE ALARM
Fuck it, dig in ya arm…
Write some lyrics in the blood…sing me a song..
Scream the essence of life, forget the petty an love…
And maybe one day hades will lend a ramp to above
Yo…we stand in the sludge…I'm just proving a point
Why bother fighting with belief, stop abusing the choice

[Baron Mynd]

Yeah yeah yeah - This is that shit!

I think I replied to this at Blunts or RnR already, definatly an impressive drop. Some ill imagery in this here, the BOOM! BOOM! section reminded me a lot of Insane Villain from RM. Lol. When heads know I introduced you here, the replies will come...

Its good to have you back bro. Keep that pen moving...

[SuperQuo]

wrd Spiritz this shit was fresh man.

<-- Poe

but yea rhyme scheme was killing it. imagery throughout. shit was nice man. you always drop heat tho lol.

[Jimmy Ripper]

damn homie dis was pretty long, but i don dat shit too mayne jus flow till i'm tired, but i was definately feelin dis shit hea mayne, u got a unique style mayne i was definately into dis whole drop, keep doin yo thang mayne

[Baron Mynd]

wrd Spiritz this shit was fresh man.

<-- Poe

but yea rhyme scheme was killing it. imagery throughout. shit was nice man. you always drop heat tho lol.

You Poe from Blunts? Man, stick around... Write somethi, post something, reply to something! ive tried to bring a bit of renaissance to this board of late, theres quite a few old heads re-surfacing again. I dont give a fuck if you havent wrote in the longest time, just drop and ill respond to it. Its time we started writing just for the love of it again, weve all been doing this long enough not to need to try and impress, so lets just get back to whats really real and means something to US. I want you guys back at this board, and writing again...

Keep those pens moving!

[LedgenZ]

I enjoyed it! It was a dope drop. The writing was entertaining, introspective and very insightful! The design of your rhyme was pretty dope as well, you had strings of multi's that kept this piece fluid, fluent, and flowing nicely. So the length of it all never really became a factor or a reason to dislike - I mean by the time I started it, it seemed like I had already finished it. It just moved alone so rapidly. So I'd say that your mechanics were definitely on point! There were a few ups and downs here and there, but nothing so major as to disrupt the overall cohesiveness and or enjoyment of the read in regards to transitions. As for the content, well, like I said it was dope. Very intelligently composed and articulated. It seems like you took a lot of time trying to critique the concepts and just make everything fit and or come off relevant as a whole. So I applaud you for your effort and accomplishments. I think you had some very crafty language riddle throughout this joint as well, and I think the metaphorical devices you used were pretty interesting. However, I wish this piece had more of a figurative overtone in accordance to the way the bars were set-up. It just seemed like at times the wordplay lacked impact between bars, like I would be expecting to see something really, really, dope and deep or metaphorical the next line but then nothing happen. It was kind of a let down and somewhat decreased the overall WOWNESS factor of the piece. And, yeah, I know, that made absolutely no sense, but right now it's kind of hard for me to find the words to express what I'm really trying to convey. Make sense? Anyway, this was a dope drop regardless of my own personal qualms ... So I'll give it the just dues it deserves!



Favorite Lines:

step by step they move together... like lemmings hungry for power
and leap into there end, covered by wax... the sun devoured
so sickening it was to see this, high above the clouds...
but as I looked down, I realized why they say icarus always frowned
bodies fell into a spiral of flesh coated in blood
struggling to contain myself, as the earth began soaking them up...
one by one...souls fled into hysteria
demons grew with hunger as there coffins arose from the mud...
digging through bones...I saw the devil smirk in amazement
pissed that I wasn't apart of the slaughter an his arrangements.
so as I saw him stare at the sky with his disbelievers
I jumped off the moutain top and flipped him the finger...

^Great imagery, some what abstract, nice rhyme scheme, tight flow, and ill fucking lyrics. It was probably my favorite part of the entire drop.



Also:

To the brim of insanity focused in on the phantom, he….
Granted me vanity here I am with a hammer we…
Formed a plan and torched ramblings…Free.
Numb to the word ..that's how non-believer's follow…
They don't bother with tomorrow, but'll suck the air ya breathe,
It's a gauntlet where we hobble bobble monsters wit a scowl
Yet the fantasy's a cancer I created to devour.

^Pretty deep, sort of. But, I think the language is what's most impressive here. Just beautifully composed my dude. I enjoyed it!


All in all ... Great job! Keep 'em coming!






pZ

[LedgenZ]

Oh yeah....Your going to need to get some links in real soon or else this is going to get closed!

[H.Notik]

I replied before I posted this.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...an-348723.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...re-348714.html

[H.Notik]

Thanks yall..

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ss-349078.html

One last up.

[Plexus]

damn good refferal baron....

First off id like to say that off the rip i was capivated and i never stopped wanting to read and thats IMO the number 1 thing needed..The flow was sick. I mean there were a coulple of spots that seemed a lil forced but never enough to disrupt the flow at all. Like the people before me your imagry was obviously intense. Very good use of vocab along with mixed metaphors...

BOOM - know the vagrants are gone;
but what happened to peace?
if my nation was strong we'd allow war to rage on the streets
but all was do is race over seas...further corrupting this futile hoax
instead of attacking from inside and constructing a truthful hope
my brothers move an toke...exhale the energy of my words
and pleasantly any enemy will eventually lose there nerve.
Now think for a second and realize defeat is certain
Since the people we most common associate with, hide behind curtains
staining any drape of knowledge with semen ,drained from a monster…
known simply as a prophet we pray to for praise and prosper
DECAY THE GOSPEL – set ablaze the pages we made resourceful
Cuz true knowledge reigns from the days the brain was tortured…

^^This part was ridiculous man..The flow, imagry even emotion was so well developed it was crazy. I mean this was fuckin very well written \piece and i cant wait to see more man..

[Derive]

A lot of deep thoughts within this drop, which is what I enjoy reading. Great imagery, but what's more important is that you got the message across. It's nice to see people writing with their soul rather than their ass.

Hope to see more from you in the future.


Would appreciate some feedback on my piece:

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ld-349158.html