User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

  1. #1
    The Beat Of Philly QaaHolic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    South Philly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    439
    Battle Record
    2-5

    definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    url to da beat
    http://humo1220.imeem.com/music/9Xws...s_most_wanted/

    definition of philly


    this phillys most wanted in this bitch... i spray off clip... then nock off ur click i let a shot rip

    thru his chest... aimin for his head dont no if he gotta vest... rappbattles listen here

    its crystal clear ... were ever im around its pistols nere... i pop shots up in air... screamin fuck the world!!! i never had the sypmathy so i'll buck at girls..

    and guys... wenver im rappin i write no lies... yall niggaz on more shit then some flies

    my squad ride... down for hommi... i keep dat white girl my niggaz call her bonni... she play wit them things

    now u try me... i leave ur bitch ass hooked up to some i-v... im most wanted in philly only real niggaz fill me...

    im fellin like pac all eyes on me... it feels like these haters got spies on me...
    i cant trust nobody not even mamma...

    i kill a nigga quick then tie up his father... see im a rider i kiss u ass bye bye
    no homo... i let the chrome blow im own yo its kinda

    hard in philly..... matter fact its hard in philly... aint no body tryna see a brother live

    people hate to see u rich... niggaz a kill u kids... its the murda cappi were aint damn thing happy...

    75 % of the kids dont no dey daddy... but im crazy im danger wen i grip the steel i unload my anger

    i put the heat to ur mellon blow ur seeds... out ur head im on niggaz heel like im gellin...

    they say i be buggin... cause i be wildin throw my set up profilin...
    but in dis city u gotta be vilent....



    peace


    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...html?p=5904373

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...html?p=5904373
    Wicked Wicked Wicked


    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  2. #2
    The Beat Of Philly QaaHolic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    South Philly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    439
    Battle Record
    2-5

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    i need sum feed
    Wicked Wicked Wicked


    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  3. #3
    is in the house Facts Machine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Manhattan, NY
    Posts
    6,055
    Battle Record
    34-13

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    Well, this is obviously meant way more for an audio. Your text skills need so much work. first off, the structure is sloppy, u need to make it look neat.. i'm not saying u should change your slang & way of speakin neither, but u spelled violent wrong, u kno, just work on that type of shit.. pretty much work on your presentation... this is text topical in an open mic forum.

    your rhyming isn't bad, but you should work on less used words, i'm not saying have a nerdy vocab and speak all poetic and shit, but words like world and girl being rhymed together is so played out, i mean u did rhyme buck and fuck, but even that's simple. another thing is the gun-talk... it's not interesting on this website... maybe in the hood and shit, but here, u'll find that most heads would rather u talk about swinging swords than guns, for the fact it's more creative, just try different shit out u know...

    overall, i don't like these kinds of pieces at all, but hey that's probably just your style... either way, i think you should try something more creative... something deeper... just read a lot of open mics and shit, and see what i mean...

    u can start by reading my piece and leaving feed-back lol.

    here's the link, return the favor...

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...in-346472.html

  4. #4
    Banned
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Newcastle
    Age
    37
    Posts
    9,029
    Battle Record
    4-7

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    This is an audio peice.

    Your writing is ready for audio, the thing to rememebr about text is that its not supossed to read good. So if it is choppy in text thats good.

    You can tell when a text writer ascends to audio. It ALWAYS sucks. ALWAYS!

    Because they're used to writing perfect uniform bars that sound good when read in the head. But the way you di it like this


    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa / bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
    ccccccc
    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa/bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
    ddddddddd

    where the following line doesnt fit the rhyme scheme is good, it's meant for audio


    its kinda

    hard in philly, matter of fact it's hard in philly


    cook dope on it...

  5. #5
    Banned
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Newcastle
    Age
    37
    Posts
    9,029
    Battle Record
    4-7

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    Come on cuz....


    you know you did wrong, and you know what you did, fix it man...


  6. #6
    The Beat Of Philly QaaHolic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    South Philly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    439
    Battle Record
    2-5

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    i new this wood sound like an audio but i dont have the mic to do it
    Wicked Wicked Wicked


    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  7. #7
    is in the house Facts Machine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Manhattan, NY
    Posts
    6,055
    Battle Record
    34-13

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    Save up money for a local studio or something, if you haven't recorded in a booth already, it would be a great experience...

    but please keep this in mind, do NOT drink or smoke too much before u get in the booth, lol i got mad fucked up before recorden my first time cuz i was nervous and then i ended up doing really bad, messin up a lot.

  8. #8
    Still in the grave Johnny 6-feet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    England, Liverpool
    Posts
    5,123
    Battle Record
    8-1

    Re: definiton (writen off pac & snoop beat)

    Closed.

    p.s. you're a cuntrag.

    SS League Record 31-8
    SS HW Champ
    14 x OM HoF



    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Similar Threads

  1. Can Pac-Man beat Floyd?
    By ha'rizon in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: November 20th, 2009, 09:35 PM
  2. Replies: 16
    Last Post: July 25th, 2009, 10:11 PM
  3. new writen
    By Third Rail in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: June 30th, 2008, 05:32 PM
  4. Oasis & Snoop
    By Aines in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: September 24th, 2005, 04:04 PM
  5. Replies: 14
    Last Post: November 15th, 2003, 10:42 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •