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Thread: Sex In The City

  1. #1
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    Sex In The City

    And they laid there, sweat drippin`, both out of breath
    With his, head in the clouds, and her head on his chest
    She liked the comfort, but what she liked better was sex
    And the way he made love, left him second to best
    And him is her other lover, husband you can call it
    But it wasn`t for the love, it was what`s in his wallet
    And the house, and the car, shoppin` sprees and the stars
    He would buy `er if she wanted, so she often felt wrong
    But this, felt so right, and it almost made it worth it
    A Mr. fucks me right, and a Mr. treats me perfect


    Ring Ring

    Hello?

    Man, I think she`s cheatin` on me, I don`t know how to prove it
    I don`t know if I want to, if it`s true, I might lose it
    But I, got this feelin`, and she`s been actin` weird
    Damn, I hope I`m just buggin`, cuz these past few years
    Have been perfect, I do everything, I treat `er like a queen
    And my heart still skips a beat when I see `er, but it seems
    Like things are a little off, and I feel a little lost
    Tryna find what`s missin`, and I`m glad you`re here to listen
    Cuz it`s been, on my mind, and it`s drivin` me nuts
    I just hope she thinks I`m everthing I try to be, FUCK!


    Yo, can I call you back? I`m kinda busy right now....

    Click

    Gets out of bed to get dressed and leave. Finds a letter in his pocket...


    Dear...

    Nevermind, I can`t bear to say your name
    I can`t bear to hear your voice, I can hear the way it changed
    And it`s clear you made your choice, I can hear it when you say
    That you love me, and it just grows clearer as we fade
    It doesn`t feel the way it used to, and the tingle`s gone away
    When you hold me in your arms, can you see it in my face?
    I have and empty spot, here, that, no one can replace
    Worn tires, I just think we`ve over run our race
    And we`re runnin` out of gas, we should go our seperate ways
    Cuz our once happy home is now a place we`ll never stay

    Love,
    ...Somebody else
    Later that night at a local bar

    ...So yea, you know, I just came here to wind down
    Have a couple of drinks, spend the night on the town
    Seen you over here alone, hidin` behind fake smiles
    So I figured I`d come join you and conversate a while
    Tell a couple dumb jokes, you know, try to make you laugh
    Get drunk, act like best friends, talk about our past
    Cuz I can tell you have one, I can see it in your eyes
    Right now they`re yellin` fuck off, but if I didn`t try
    I`d be wonderin` what if, and girl, that`s a heavy burden
    For a man like myself, but really, I`m a nice person
    If you`d get to know me...


    You wanna get out of here? It`s kind of dull.
    We can go back to my place and have a few drinks...


    At her house...

    Ring Ring...Ring Ring...Ring Ring


    Hey... you know who you`ve reached.
    I`m obviously not home, so leave a message at the beep...


    Hey bitch, I know your home, I can see you in the window
    I knew somethin` was wrong, didn`t think you`d fuck other men tho
    Who is he? I fuckin` swear to god if I see his face
    Never thought I`d be this mad, emotion causin` my knees to shake
    Fuck! You little whore, but it`s funny, you see
    I been cheatin` on you to, but she means nuthin` to me
    A couple roses keep `er happy, more that I can say for you
    But I guess what goes around comes around, in more ways than 2
    So fuck it, I guess we`re done, I can watch it blow past me
    Like caution to the wind, I just hope that you`re happy


    Click

    And they laid there, him passed out, her, wide awake
    Eyes closed, been a while since she had a smile on `er face
    Glad that she brought him home, turned out to be a nice man
    But he was drunk, hopefully it`ll be more than a one night stand
    But for now, she was content with him stayin` the night
    Cuz what used to feel wrong... now felt so right
    She ended up cathin` feelings, she was hopin` to miss it
    And the way he made love, well, she could deal with it
    The way he talked and listened, she wonders why his wife left him
    Kissed `em good night, fell asleep next to her ex`s best friend


    A.i

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  2. #2
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    Last edited by Nahlidge; July 13th, 2007 at 11:45 AM

    A.i

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  3. #3
    Original Outlaw Domain 9's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    Oh damn, Nahlidge! That was a good read! The whole damn time I was like... what's gonna happen? Very nice story and VERY well written I love how you layed out the storyline... with the answer machine and how all the lives intertwined it was great... nice job sir!

    2 Up!
    Artificial Intelligence
    *~P.U.R.E.~*
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    Damn Girl!

  4. #4
    bobericc _Lyrics's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    this shit was flames. not even a love triangle but a square lol... oh man that was really clever using the color and italics and bold to indicate the person. the flow was nice, multis and all that. good imagery an overall great piece, the emotion sounded ill switching off to different personas. omhof for sure
    GreaterDesignGrowers.com

    Im not a rapper, im a gardener

  5. #5
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    This was one of the best pieces i have ever read on rb. It was flawless in my opinion. I don't even know what to say. Brillant. If this doesn't make the HOF i'm cutting off johnny, blacks, and witness' balls. Not much to critique here. I loved every part of it. The story was amazing and believable and just seemed so damn real. Hit close to home man. I really felt this.
    Follow at
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    Music --->>>>
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  6. #6
    Abraxas
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    Re: Sex In The City

    AHHAHA I loved this read. its great to see your stil around.
    One of the best peices ive read in a while and i stay reading open mics. this was a very nice written and the stroyline was just out of control in a good way!. The emotion was so unique and the imagery i can like real see what is happening and shit. the rhyme cheme was good too. this was an entertaining read keep it up Nah
    Percept Shun

  7. #7
    The Witness. Witty's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    I'll keep this open for now, but make sure you get links by the end of the day.

    I'm only doing this because I know you usually follow the rules

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    24 x OM Hall Of Fame

  8. #8
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    Thanks for the replies. And the links are there now.

    A.i

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  9. #9

    Re: Sex In The City

    yes yes bro - this shit was fuckin superb!! Gotta be a HOF If ever i saw one, .. seriously man, you are a very talented writer, and having known you for years, you seem to get better with each piece you write.

    keep up the godliness.

    Peace & God Bless.
    K2.
    ~*~Pure~*~



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  10. #10
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    fuckin sick man...nice topic i mean cliche but you just made it a whole new world with your concepts, metaphors and wording...beating around the played areas nah mean..nahlidge?!... great job man just magnificent on ho wyou made this your world and just made it so understandable for the reader to feel your expressions of emotion and anger ad love and pain all in one man.. shit was crazy and i loved it man... i cant say much cus there is nothing else to say man... just dope man... no need for more detailed feed cus it speaks for itself.

    Fav. Lines
    And they laid there, sweat drippin`, both out of breath
    With his, head in the clouds, and her head on his chest
    She liked the comfort, but what she liked better was sex
    And the way he made love, left him second to best
    And him is her other lover, husband you can call it
    But it wasn`t for the love, it was what`s in his wallet
    And the house, and the car, shoppin` sprees and the stars
    He would buy `er if she wanted, so she often felt wrong
    But this, felt so right, and it almost made it worth it
    A Mr. fucks me right, and a Mr. treats me perfect

    Ring Ring

    Hello?

    Man, I think she`s cheatin` on me, I don`t know how to prove it
    I don`t know if I want to, if it`s true, I might lose it
    But I, got this feelin`, and she`s been actin` weird
    Damn, I hope I`m just buggin`, cuz these past few years
    Have been perfect, I do everything, I treat `er like a queen
    And my heart still skips a beat when I see `er, but it seems
    Like things are a little off, and I feel a little lost
    Tryna find what`s missin`, and I`m glad you`re here to listen
    Cuz it`s been, on my mind, and it`s drivin` me nuts
    I just hope she thinks I`m everthing I try to be, FUCK!

    Yo, can I call you back? I`m kinda busy right now....

    Click

    Gets out of bed to get dressed and leave. Finds a letter in his pocket...


    Quote:
    Dear...

    Nevermind, I can`t bear to say your name
    I can`t bear to hear your voice, I can hear the way it changed
    And it`s clear you made your choice, I can hear it when you say
    That you love me, and it just grows clearer as we fade
    It doesn`t feel the way it used to, and the tingle`s gone away
    When you hold me in your arms, can you see it in my face?
    I have and empty spot, here, that, no one can replace
    Worn tires, I just think we`ve over run our race
    And we`re runnin` out of gas, we should go our seperate ways
    Cuz our once happy home is now a place we`ll never stay

    Love,
    ...Somebody else
    just a nice switch from stanza to stanza with quotes and shit man.

    hit this please in return
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ft-342066.html
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  11. #11
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    Re: Sex In The City

    Yeah I agree with everyone - this was hot!
    extremely entertaining to say the least. And what a wonderful title...expertly chosen to fit the topic. I mean where do I start?
    the entire love affair was like a cinematic movie...rich in detail and color...captivating, suspenseful, and intriguing. I just love the way you wrote this...the dialogue was just ingenious, scene by scene, reel by reel...the story unfolded before my eyes in real time. Great drop man!

    favorite lines:
    And it`s clear you made your choice, I can hear it when you say
    That you love me, and it just grows clearer as we fade
    It doesn`t feel the way it used to, and the tingle`s gone away
    When you hold me in your arms, can you see it in my face?
    Just genius and totally relatable!

  12. #12
    Soule
    Guest

    Re: Sex In The City

    Congrads, you're in the Open Mic Mag.

  13. #13
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    Re: Sex In The City

    Thanks for the replies. I thought I was finally gonna write sumthin` more than 20 lines and not get any feedback lol.

    A.i

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  14. #14

    Re: Sex In The City

    dope shit.

    -gestures

  15. #15

    Re: Sex In The City

    Nahlidge is a fat turd...
    He is also an incredible writer who happens be a fat turd..
    Word up bro`
    I haven't talked to you in a minute or read anything from you in a long time
    I almost forgot how crisp your writing style is with the detailing of dean koonz,
    This was an enjoyable read bro
    Hit me up on msn.
    Peace

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...lf-340036.html

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