"And a few die with remorse" - Jonathon
Thoughts fly by my mind,
like rocket armed butterflys'.
Blowing the many wigs off,
of lier's heads to open their,
minds, and allow the pressure,
to fall along the others,
brothers complete the fixture,
in a magnificant trough mixture.
Take a look at me, I'll comtemplate suicide, limb by limb, tree by tree
Each stroke pleads to make me think back, reminding love, reluctantly
A kiss of death, could be a kids last breath, the pain's almost gone...
For better or worse, I strive to crack a smile, before the crack of dawn
Whether or not this could be my last hour, I'm atop the tallest tower
I rain tears upon those below me, only bestowing a small shower
Running images through my head, of the past and future of me dead
From the frightening creatures, I fled... but now I'm the suture instead
No longer scared, as I just stare down death through its very skull
In this pickle, he swung the sickle unto me, but I found it fairly dull
Around the playground,
the blood hound sniff's for blood.
All the evidence washed away,
from minor's who begin to flood.
They pet and praise the dog,
with joy and supporting laughter.
Then out of the tree's I fell,
a few seconds shortly after.
Children scream, bag's bomb under their eyes, thinking its just a dream
Looking into the after-life, I hear cries, taking the pain to a new extreme
I knew what I had to do, and I knew that my end was getting near,
Blood dripped as a tear from my ear, and it appeared my time stopped here
The stress, compressed with years of hate, apologies a bit too late
Led me to believe, why I'm in a blood filled lake, closed in by heaven's gate
The stairway to my savior,
the flavor of relief I savor.
Waiting forever for 10 seconds,
which of now it beckons.
Everyone has to go some way,
many are different of coarse.
A few today, a few tomorrow,
and a few die with remorse.
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. You give a very nice description in this piece and the emotion carried the piece. I felt that the picture fit nicelty with the piece after i had read it at first i was wtf...lol but it worked out nice in the end. The wording was aiight and your rhymescheme was very much on point aswell. Your grammar was fine and your precision was very nice also, It had a good fluency about it which made the piece read really well, and the line length switches made the piece changed points and ish very good, and i have to agree with A.J that this was a motivational piece man, so all i have left to say is that this is was a very good piece and thanks for the read. Good job.