User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Judgement Day

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    351

    Judgement Day

    Chorus
    (Singin)In the end we all share the same fate
    (Rappin)death then judgement day
    (Singin)tryin to get inside them pearly gates
    (Rappin)cause hell's the other way
    (Singin)life's actions get put on replay
    (rappin)as God reviews the tape
    (Singin)When it's your turn what you think he's gonna say?
    (Singin)which way you gonna take?

    Verse1
    Years of dealin got me sweatin profusely, waitin in line
    concealin my feelins more than usually, it's judgement time
    think back on past mistakes and the first to pop in my head
    was the first time I gripped the glock and popped, shot out lead
    I was disturbed, shakin, vision blurred, the car swirved and hopped the curb
    I turned and dipped, on my word, don't know if I hit, stomach stirred
    heard the sirens lift from the silent night and peirce my ears
    eyes was fierce to tears, fightin em off and sayin cheers to fears
    hate my deceitful peers, they peer pressured me
    now I'm near to the edge, in church cryin confessions-G

    In the end we all share the same fate
    death then judgement day
    tryin to get inside them pearly gates
    cause hell's the other way
    life's actions get put on replay
    as god reviews the tape
    when it's your turn what you think he's gonna say?
    which way you gonna take?

    Verse2
    The line inches forward as people rejected and turned away
    my minds racin more, if I'm rejected I'll burn today
    I question my faith and pray, a deliberate Kodak
    hopin that God will see I'm repentin and show that...
    words thats present in the bible and preached are carried out
    show forgiveness and be forgived, "I'm sorry's" just air me out
    I'm in extreme anguish, a migrane of faults crashin in my head
    hopefully the ends painless, this cult mass is my friends
    my affiliation and extensive involvment with masses of criminals
    incriminates me cause I didn't pay heed to messages subliminal

    In the end we all share the same fate
    death then judgement day
    tryin to get inside them pearly gates
    cause hells the other way
    life's actions get put on replay
    as god reviews the tape
    when it's your turn what you think he's gonna say?
    which way you gonna take?

    before I left this mornin, my mom's was scornin, "stop the sinnin son"
    walked out grinnin mom I'm winnin, hopped up in the Hum
    patrolled the block, scrutinizin the smaller crews behind me
    the blue was eyein me, tossed a stack of green, they cruisin by me
    on top of my game, that's when the shots rang, and came to stain...
    the white tee with my crimson rain, in pain, I'm slain
    it's my turn, I bow before the lord my knees burn, and mind churns
    begin to cry as he mumbles denied terms, his eyes stern
    to my shoulder he puts his hand, to distinguish I'm damned
    pulls back quickly lookin sickly, then he's screamin "ahmen"
    son you've repented, every crime commited resulted in church confessions
    I give your soul carressin, and for your holy repents, here's your blessin
    *Opens Gates*

    Chorus to end
    -Play-Boy

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post3436005
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...21#post3436021
    Last edited by Play-Boy187G; November 12th, 2005 at 11:19 AM

  2. #2
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Age
    33
    Posts
    425
    Battle Record
    6-5
    bad flow in the chorus, could use more vocab, but it was sdtill decent, the chorus didnt flow well at all, i dunno...... maybe im reading it worng, but i still dont like it, your imagery was ok, but this wasnt an original topic, try dreaming up some new shit. and try to throw some multies in their

    overall decent piece, 7/10

    hit up gods of destruction, links in my sig

  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    351
    Uppin for feed..^^^^^^^

  4. #4
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    351
    Uppin for feedback...^^^

  5. #5
    Banned
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    5,480
    Battle Record
    12-1
    bad flow in the chorus, could use more vocab, but it was sdtill decent, the chorus didnt flow well at all, i dunno...... maybe im reading it worng, but i still dont like it, your imagery was ok, but this wasnt an original topic, try dreaming up some new shit. and try to throw some multies in their

    overall decent piece, 7/10

  6. #6
    S.S. .:KLePTo:.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    D-Town
    Posts
    2,378
    Battle Record
    17-9
    yeah chorus is hard to follow....is it being sung, rapped or just spoken....hard to grasp the flow of it....Overall the verses were nice..probably sound better in audio then they look in text. good piece homie

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  7. #7
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    351
    DAMN....I forgot to write where it was singin and where it was rappin in the chorus my bad....hopefully it sounds better to you now...I was wonderin why ya'll couldn't get the flow of the chorus....anyway thanks for feedback...uppin
    -The Optimist

  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    351
    uppin for feedback^^^^^^^

Similar Threads

  1. Day of Judgement
    By Tragic in forum Poetic Scriptures
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: June 13th, 2014, 12:45 PM
  2. The Judgement Day
    By Vinzr in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: June 7th, 2011, 11:35 PM
  3. judgement day
    By chaotikist in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: September 27th, 2005, 03:02 PM
  4. Its Judgement Day
    By Jackpott8s in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: July 29th, 2003, 07:24 PM
  5. judgement day
    By J. Hustle in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: January 9th, 2003, 03:58 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •