*Nineteen*
Wow its indoubtley true
that i would like to be with you
but to mah dad it seems
that your a adult but your only nineteen
as cute as you are eyes sparkle as bright as a star
your smile touches my heart and soul
just a friend you are and will always be
just look and see
that you will always be too old for me
i felt this needed to be longer....
also you should have gone deeper into the feelings.....like anger at the father...misery at not being able to be with her.....this seemed to be like a mini reveiw of a bigger piece...you told us what happened...but you need to jump into the subject a bit more...
you have a decent idea......now just elaborate........make us feel your pain!!
lol keep it up
yea it shoulda beel a lil longer... coulda added a lil more detail to it.. i liked the topic doe i relate
thanx cuz i kno.......i didnt have that much to say but i will elaborate sum more on it....lol
thanx autofix...for ya input yeah i feel tha same way..lol
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